Story Time With D's...Gather 'round children!

it was awesome! on the way driving back sheriffs were hauling ass going into the opposite direction. driving right into the fucking tornado.
i hear t-town is fucked. hope my dads alright.
 
If he's dead...I hope you'll search for drugs and "steal" his wallet. ...and SS# and not say he's dead.
 
lol xD, yeah cheese pups are those dog treats that look EXSACTLY like fucking cheesetos sept they are shaped like a bone, i thought it was a chedder chesee log or something new.

you want to hear a story?

when i was a kid.. and i just began to learn what "fapping" was., i couldn't help myself but fap atleast 3+ times a day, sometimes more. i'd fap on the bed fap on the floor fapped so long i grew a fappin' afro then i fapped to the left fapped to the right fapped to the sound of momma cookin rice.
anyways, i couldn't help but fap almost 24/7, i still took time out of the day to eat my captin crunch baries and work on my cursive homework assignments.
well oneday in shop i was like, i'm fuckin tired of fapping, so i desided to make a feefee, everyone else in class was making like fuckin bookshelves, and birdhouses. fuckthat shit i want to fap, the birdhouse gave me the idea because of the hole, and the bookshelf reminded me of my dads porn that i will get into later in the night. well everyone is working on their projects and i'm hammering,sawing,stapleing,glueing,fapping,sandwich, etc.
here is a microsoft paint drawing of my fapper:
drewsfapper.jpg

wish i still had the real thing, my mom threw it away after she saw my exexex gf's panties stuffed in the "birdhouse", she got courious about why there were women panties stuffd in a birdhouse, so she investageted like a snoob,.
oneday afterschool i was bust fappin in my ''birdhouse'' and i didn't kno that my mom setted me up, she put glue in my ''lube'' bubbles, and she fucking made me glue myself to the ''birdhouse'', whats fucked up is i had to go confront her and my dad, and sisters and fucking brother.
they laughed at me, hard, like they were crying, i felt so emberased. so went to the hospital with this still on my penis, well my best friends mom is a nurse in the ER and well since she saw what i did, she stopped letting her son hang out with me :/.
the doctor wasn't laughing, he told me that i have serous issues, and sent me to a therapist.
and well ive been fuckd in the head since.
the end!


Bahahahahahahaha I can't stop bahahahaing.
 
So the other day at church the christianmingles.com chick rolld her ankle and she was to heavy for me to lift up, so i went n pulld the car around so she could grabhold of the seatbelt or someshit. she wanted me to rub her feet later but i have found ways to get outa these situations, the whole day i planned that i was sick. so when we got 2 her place i fingerd my throat and made my throwups sound like i was dieeeing! she took the bait and told me 2 go see the doctor, which i bumpd out n never came back.

she shoulda known wat was upwhen she took ehr shoes off and the bottom of her socks were as black as my dress pants.
 
awww D's what is christianmingles doin for you?! is she at least a good cook?
 
bookmarking for tomorrow, or this evening ... not sure what day it is.

(thanks for bumping ... )
 
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