So Who Likes Benzos? Ver III: Blackouts and Amnesia

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pinkanga

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Yeah that is unfortunate. And this is purely speculation but likely they wouldnt have the motivation or even the thought to enjoy their drugs in a sensible fashion. I like to think that those of us on bluelight are self aware enough to acknowledge our hobby and all that comes with it and to do what it takes to avoid self-delusion and ultimately stay safe.

Non-english speakers in this country who are using drugs are probably so far from that reality that cleaning a needle before re-using is probably the extent of their harm minimisation efforts.

Maybe Paul Dillon should focus his efforts on educating people like that. And hey, maybe he does, I have no fucking clue what that dude does all day or what his basic job description is.
 

Mr Blonde

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Edited a post that was offering to provide a source for a therapeutic substance. Links only for HR goods, not drugs of any kind including 'natural' substances.
 

ayjay

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^ It used to come in gel caps (known as temaze 'eggs' I think), in dosages greater than 10mg I believe, so people could just suck the gel straight into the fit. I think it was mainly used in conjunction with heroin or as a cheap replacement when one was sick, they took the stuff off the market due to people losing limbs from injecting it. IIRC a report I read on it suggested it was popular amongst the non English speaking Vietnamese community, I suppose those who don't speak english would find it harder to educate themselves on HR. That said I have known several English speaking, caucasian heroin users (mostly junkies, but not all) to inject the gel in Unisom/diphenhydramine capsules alongside heroin, so injecting gel from caps definately isn't something confined to those who don't speak English.
Up until late 2000, the majority of temazepam gel-cap (normies, footies, temazzies) injection (in Vic at least) was done by young male street heroin dealers from SE Asian backgrounds. Typically injected into the femoral vein along with heroin. It definitely kicks along the effect of the heroin (combining heroin and benzos is not unique and is done everywhere!) but was probably also a signifier of membership in a select group (let's face it - it's pretty hardcore!!). Temazepam is thrombophlebitic - it irritates and inflames human tissue including veins and arteries and is just not suitable for injection. Also - it's not water soluble. The gel contents used to be fairly runny but injection here and elsewhere (quite a culture of it in Scotland I believe) led to synthetic oil added to thicken. This just meant that people ran a lighter under the gel when it was sitting on the needle to soften the contents - and increased the harm as the gel contents solidified and stuck to lining of veins. Also led to "normie tatts" - carbon from lighter on needle being inserted under skin in injection process. There were definitely some leg amputations and hospitalisations for endocarditis related to this practice. But it was a fairly small group involved and you could surmise not a priority population for the health system

Anyways, the "heroin drought" that kicked in Jan 2001 meant that people were hurting - the gear was a fraction of the strength and heaps more expensive. Not surprisingly, the practice of injecting normies exploded across the using scene. Bad shit happened straight away - most people were not using their femoral vein (which has the advantage of being fairly big) and experience vein collapse, abscesses etc straight away. People who had been banging up in their arms for years ran out of usable veins in as little as a matter of weeks and in some cases started injecting in their necks and groin (yes much more dangerous!). The Vic government funded some focus groups and we ended up with a bunch of pamphlets showing gangrenous hands and other gore porn (actually a bit deceitful - the photo they showed was of auto-amputation caused by accidental arterial injection of a crushed up temazepam tablet - not a gel). This did as much as most pamphlets do to curb the practice - what finally stopped temazepam gel cap injection was their removal from sale in Australia.

Soon after the temazepam gels disappeared, unisom injection started up. If you're used to injecting gels then you look for a replacement I guess. Luckily - unisom injection is a lot less harmful than temazepam injection. Diphenhydramine is actually water soluble and less potential for trouble than benzos. Not as strong, but will still boost the effect of your cap of heroin for a minimal outlay.
 

Halif

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^great post. Clonazepam is my favourite amongst the benzos that I've tried. It's a really useful and helpful substance.

I certainly woulnd't like to be stuck with it, and yes 5mg a day is a long way to come down from, especially given its long half life. I hope it works out for you somehow. At least it sounds like you're realistic about your 'relationship' with Clonaz. Facebook and benzos are contraindicated, I believe:p
 

Beat Narrative

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i have been having all sorts of problems the last month getting off poppyseed tea and benzo's were my saviour, as i hardly use them they were very effective, its amazing though how quick your tolerance rises though

I have not had any in the past 2 weeks and i have been having terrible insomnia and anxiety, i have no doctor in my area that i have seen more than once snd i don't feel comftable asking a doctor to prescribe something like valium without having a decent history of seeing them

Thankfully a very kind person has given me their script of valium, so now i just need to reduce my weed consumption (a major cause of my anxiety) and be disciplined with my sleep routine, i am fond of binging on benzo's though so i have to give them to my girlfriend to dole them out to me.

Hopefully i can use this script for a beneficial purpose as opposed to getting wasted, if i can drastically reduce my weed consumption i think my anxiety will decrease and i will be able to function and hopefully will not need anymore type of benzo , this is the plan anyway
 

euphoricc

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i love benzos i dont get blacked out wish i did..........................best imo is klonopin is the best xanax dosent last me long enough
 

drug_mentor

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^ Trust me you don't wish you blacked out. What exactly is fun about an experience you remember NOTHING about, generally do silly things that often jeopardise personal relationships (occassionally your freedom) and using several times more of your drug supply than you would for an enjoyable experience you actually remembered?

I can only speak to my own experiences but blackouts on benzo's have never lead me to anything but trouble and misery.
 

pinkanga

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^^^ was going to say the exact same thing earlier today. In my experience "blacking out" and benzo related memory issues in general simply added to post benzo anxiety. Nothing desirable about amnesia.
 

Stato

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Hadn't ever really had bentos, got my hnads on a few 5mg valiums... Those went, then I got a couple more.. Those went too. Found 2 2mg Xanax bars in my hands and ate both in 2 doses day after day. Then I got my hands on some 10mg diazepam, have had 20mg yesterday and 30mg tonight...

Great stuff to have around but I much prefer the Xanax hey, Valium is really good to chill out and for anxiety, plus I keep having issues with my jaw dislocating, the Valium prevents a lot of pain here... Gonna take a break though, see if I can get by with codeine for the jaw pain and just keep relocating it myself, benzo withdrawal doesn't sound fun...

I'm not even that drowsy from 30mg (3 seperate doses, within 2-3hours though)

Someone please, punch me in the jaw... :(
 

sonic_reality

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^ Trust me you don't wish you blacked out. What exactly is fun about an experience you remember NOTHING about, generally do silly things that often jeopardise personal relationships (occassionally your freedom) and using several times more of your drug supply than you would for an enjoyable experience you actually remembered?

I can only speak to my own experiences but blackouts on benzo's have never lead me to anything but trouble and misery.
definitely... and not only that, but they can be very dangerous. during a blackout, i ended up eating a good portion of my stash, in doses that could have killed me when put in combination with everything else i had taken. what started out as eating 2mg of xanax to treat a panic attack(i DID NOT want to get high), ended up with me eating 6mg xanax, 4mg clonazepam, 50mg temazepam, 20mg diazepam, 160mg oxycodone, 100mg morphine, 600ug fentanyl lollipop and a 6 pack of beer. i am lucky that my partner woke up in the middle of the night to find me putting cooking pots in the fridge and other random stuff like that, and stayed awake with me until i passed out, where she made sure i was asleep in a safe position where i would not choke on my tongue. i took the initial dose of xanax at 10pm, and woke up on the couch at 3pm the next day, with no recollection of what happened after the initial dose. the only reason i know how much i took, is because i knew how much was in my stash before i took anything.

it was a scary realistion to make, knowing that i very easily could have died from those doses and combinations. that night i flushed the rest of my benzos and decided to face my anxiety without them. i still have issues with anxiety, and fiending on benzos when i have them... but that was a very big wakeup call on how easily things can go wrong!!

having no recollection of what happened the night before is scary enough, without also knowing that what i did during that blackout could have killed me!
 

drug_mentor

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I got my hands on an Erimin 5 today. Not sure when I will be taking it but I am rather excited as I think this will be my first new benzo for over a year since I was prescribed bromazepam for the first time, very much looking forward to it. :D
 

Stato

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50mg diazepam, 1.5mg Xanax (1 orally .5 intranasal), and 4 drinks tonight. Not bad.


Rapid tolerance though.
 

Mr Blonde

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I got my hands on an Erimin 5 today. Not sure when I will be taking it but I am rather excited as I think this will be my first new benzo for over a year since I was prescribed bromazepam for the first time, very much looking forward to it. :D
I'm jealous comrade. :D

i love benzos i dont get blacked out wish i did..........................best imo is klonopin is the best xanax dosent last me long enough
You really don't want to experience. It might seem funny the first couple of times, forgetting what happened during a night out and hearing stories or whatever, but it's easy to do stupid, life-changing things whilst blacked out. I lost two months to alprazolam addiction and fucked up a whole lot of things, still dealing with the consequences half a year later.
 

Sustanon

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Im just wondering how soooo many people take it by itself for recreational purposes and abuse the hell out of it. Do most of you guys take it by itself or combine it? I mean I used to be addicted to it as well but I needed to combine it with something else because by itself it was so boring and not recreational at all. U get pissed off from not getting high and just end up taking more and then getting knocked out lol Like Mr Blonde said its not good to get a blackout as you have a big chance on doing stupid things which u can easily regret later. I suspect a lot of people like me were chasing that first experience when ud get a drunk feeling off half a bar but unfortunately that experience only happens when u have zero or very very low tolerance and as we all know tolerance rises very very rapidly with benzos.
 

Beat Narrative

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valium, wine and weed is my recreational benzo use

been using xanax and valimus over the last month almost daily (helping with opiate wd), i have only been given one scrit though the rest from friends

I am worried about potential wd's as i dont think i will be given anymore by my doctor

shoud have used this script properly to get off the stupid amounts of booze i consume, i have given 30 to my gf so she can give them to me in reduced amounts as i will just gobble 7 and drink wine then write shit on the internet for hours of no relevance

the worst part is my gf has now left me due to being such a wasted fuckwit and i have no idea where those 30 valiums are
 

pinkanga

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Im just wondering how soooo many people take it by itself for recreational purposes and abuse the hell out of it. Do most of you guys take it by itself or combine it? I mean I used to be addicted to it as well but I needed to combine it with something else because by itself it was so boring and not recreational at all. U get pissed off from not getting high and just end up taking more and then getting knocked out lol Like Mr Blonde said its not good to get a blackout as you have a big chance on doing stupid things which u can easily regret later. I suspect a lot of people like me were chasing that first experience when ud get a drunk feeling off half a bar but unfortunately that experience only happens when u have zero or very very low tolerance and as we all know tolerance rises very very rapidly with benzos.
I agree to a certain extent but you get to a point where you have abused them enough and learned some tough lessons. That experience teaches you to respect them and enjoy them more sensibly. Well it did for me anyway. I can get a lot out of just 1 or 2mg alpraz now.... just by savouring them at the end of the day with a nice scotch or whatever. Sure its not as fun as having 4mg at once and feeling fucking awesome for a few hours, but 1 or 2 at the end of the day can still be pretty satisfying.

Its also great still having a stash after 2 weeks ;) Not to mention any sort of exercised self-discipline always feels good.

the worst part is my gf has now left me due to being such a wasted fuckwit and i have no idea where those 30 valiums are
lol that sux. I bet youre more annoyed about that than you are your girl leaving at this point.
 

Beat Narrative

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if i had the choice of my gf and making amends for amends for an 8 year relaionship i think i would choose my gf over the valium

however the valium would assist incredibly self destructive mindset right now as i dont think she is returning
 

Sustanon

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Welcome to teh world of drugs man, it ruins friendships and family and a million other things. Really hope u can get off them without any issues man, I know exactly how it is:S Benzo withdrawals are the worst, worse than all the drugs combined together (well almost lol). I realized that benzos do not decrease anxiety over time when u go off them. Its the worst medication ever invented. Its only good if u really really need something when in a bad situation. My anxiety was through the roof when I went off them. Hope everything works out for you bro and manage to get your gf back.
 
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