Awoke this morning and everything is as it was. This is comforting as the opposing is what gets to me... where the fu** did everybody* go?
BL is still here, .
Get paid today (which all goes to bills so translates to something ~ bills get paid today... which is cool)
The sun is out and will bask for a minute after putting on psychonaught-goggles; could use some vit d and sh**.
check this sh** out... owl sittin inna tree in back yard prolly looking for a kitten to snatch. he/she been haunting around for a couple years. hear it always in the early morning in the distance.
I got up early this morning for an appointment and I have a new man in my life. They say if you go to bed thinking about 3 positive things you have done that day, you can wake up 'happier'. It's evidence based (apparently), but sorry I don't have the reference to hand
^good on you. i need some wake up happy strategies.
i've been rolling around in bed for far too long today dreading a meeting i had at 5pm. morning depression would not leave me. i finally forced myself up, took my taper dose of sub, ate breakfast and some coffee (at 3pm), and checked the weather. it's in the teens fahrenheit and will be dark and closer to single digits by 5pm. bicycle is how i get around, no car to fall back on. i was thinking i'd bus it, because even with winter socks, boots, and two pairs of gloves it's physically painful to bike at that temp. then i got an email asking if i wanted to reschedule. so glad. not only do i not have to bike through this weather or spend twice as long and money on a bus, but i was having a hard time shaking the depression and putting on my business face. it would not have been acceptable to be down during this meeting, where the other person is likely going to offer me a small contract job.
i should apply for a job in lieu. instead of letting the evening go to waste.
Day off tomorrow. Enjoyable hold'm tournament tonight at my favorite dive bar. Mandolin study is progressing.. allot new interrelated areas of my mind are hopefully hooking up.. and I can not wait. I might actually be able to go off on this instrument someday...
Went out for eggs benny and a blueberry pancake with my Mom and blushed out almost the entire female wait staff. I'm looking really good these days and I get smiles and blushes all day long and that makes me feel good about myself. Day off so im going to play some poker, practice my Mandolin, soak at the club and maybe catch a movie,
I woke up today and I've got food to eat and clean water to drink. I'm warm and not sleeping in the cold. I'm making steps towards fixing who I am as a person. Today is not a good day, It's a blessing!
^ Nice.. I rode dirt for a bit.. Completed a national enduro once then I almost broke my back and that was that. So wicked, but also a split second from permanent results and i wont ride street because too many moron drivers can end your ride.
Felt good enough to start cleaning my house a bit today, feels good to be in a slightly tidier space now.
I've learned that small self-care jobs like keeping a nice environment to live in/good personal hygiene/taking care of appearance/do a little exerise/decent diet etc make a huge difference to the process of returning to feeling healthy. Starting small just by spending a small amount of time each day on doing a couple of these types of jobs really helps get the ball rolling towards recovery for me.
A bold and uncompromising feminist manifesto that shows women and girls how to defy, disrupt, and destroy the patriarchy by embracing the qualities they’ve been trained to avoid. Seizing upon the...
Seizing upon the energy of the #MeToo movement, feminist activist Mona Eltahawy advocates a muscular, out-loud approach to teaching women and girls to harness their power through what she calls the “seven necessary sins” that women and girls are not supposed to commit: to be angry, ambitious, profane, violent, attention-seeking, lustful, and powerful. All the necessary “sins” that women and girls require to erupt.
Eltahawy knows that the patriarchy is alive and well, and she is fed the hell up: Sexually assaulted during hajj at the age of fifteen. Groped on the dance floor of a night club in Montreal at fifty. Countless other injustices in the years between. Illuminating her call to action are stories of activists and ordinary women around the world—from South Africa to China, Nigeria to India, Bosnia to Egypt—who are tapping into their inner fury and crossing the lines of race, class, faith, and gender that make it so hard for marginalized women to be heard. Rather than teaching women and girls to survive the poisonous system they have found themselves in, Eltahawy arms them to dismantle it.