• Bluelight
    Shrine




    A memorial
    to Bluelighters
    who have passed away

RIP knock

Dear Knocks sister,

My sentiments are shared here already but I extend my condolences to you and your family. I think you clearly understand how much Knock meant to everyone here however I do respect you and your family's right to privacy. The MS fundraiser I do believe is a beautiful idea and if some good can come out of such a tragedy that can only be a good thing. If someone else could just PM Kronos to ask them to remove or change the surname on the Just giving page (I am strapped for time right now) anonymity can remain and the gestures can continue financially. I know Kronos had a few problems setting up the page and I think it is a right thing that should carry on.

Huge love <3
 
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I've already PM'd Kronos asking him to make the donation page anonymous, and we'll continue to donate to it anonymously if that's ok? It would have it's own thread dedicated to a 'lost friend' or similar and make no mention of knock or your family.

That said, last goodbye to a man I enjoyed working with and who I wish I'd gotten to know a bit more, and love to his family.
 
No..... :( :( :(

Knock.... Michael.... reached out to me when I was in pain. He wasn't afraid or freaked out, just kind and _there_.

I haven't read the whole thread -- but to knock's sister: I hope you know from this thread that his kindness helped so many people. I am *absolutely sure* that his harm reduction posts have saved lives, and I really really feel for what you're going through.
 
What a terrible loss
Knock(ando) was one of the first to welcome me back to EADD after a self imposed exile.
He grew to be one of my favorite posters and a great mod.

RIP Dude
 
Sister2Knock said:
Dear All, I am Michael's sister and I want to post some info and correct a couple of things.
My cousin and I have looked at this thread and we want to thank you for your caring for Michael.
He was a tremendously loving and generous son, brother, uncle, cousin, nephew and friend, as well as a contributor to this community. His family loved him very much and he loved us back.
He died last Friday in his home alone. Why? The post mortem showed no reason. But as you all well know he may have recklessly taken something which stopped his heart or his breathing.
It was a terrible waste. And our heartbreak over his loss will be with us for as long as we live.
We know he wanted to find a deeper purpose for his life. He felt deeply and thought deeply and wanted to make the world a better place.
A Few things:
We appreciate the generosity of those who have contributed to the MS society in his name. At the same time, it feels uncomfortable because his brother who is dealing with MS is a very private person and we don't want to draw attention to him.
About flowers: We have asked people not to send flowers. There will be wildflowers. Send your beautiful thoughts, and help make sure nobody else senselessly dies too young.
We have seen the posts about Michael being demoted as a mod. We know that would have been a blow to him. But we don't believe he harmed himself deliberately or because of anyone here. Please don't blame yourselves or one another.
Michael had pain he did not share.
My brother posted that I was a heroin addict for a while. Well that's just not true. I have never used heroin -- or any other opiate beyond co-codamol for toothache. I'm simply baffled how he got that idea. My cousin said he told her I'd written it in a family letter. I wish he'd talked to me about it so I could have set him right. Somehow that idea became a memory for him, but it was a false one.
I wish Michael had been more cautious. I wish he'd found his purpose, found his happiness in life. I will miss him always.
After you have had time to process and share, we humbly ask that you remove this thread and his profile. His family and close friends deserve privacy. I don't think Michael would want his parents or his niece and nephew to see this.
He valued the people in this community I know you valued him. Keep him in your hearts, stay safe and seek your happiness. That's what he would have wanted....

Peace
Click to expand...

How very, very kind & very brave of you to visit this place & post such a wonderful message to all those who've, quite simply, been devastated to hear of Michaels passing. We passed each other in the boards & chatted many times, but I can't say we were close. However, he was remarkable intellect & wit & I didn't have to be close to him to know he had a heart of gold. Which is probably why his sould was too good for our stale earth.

I don't just believe in lfe after death. I know it to be so.

So these are only temporary partings, from this mortal coil, in some strange inexplicable way, I know Knock feels the love that I & everyone else here have expressed.

Bless you, everyone in the family & Knocks friends. We won't forget!
 
Miss you in EADD n we'll never forget you ever we'll hold you in our hearts always xxxx
 
RIP dude, shame we crossed lines a bit in our latest communications.
 
Coming back to Bluelight after a long period of inactivity, it is very sad to read of this tragic loss.

R.I.P Knock, you will be remembered. <3
 
still hurts man and now to learn the is no explanation as to why you left us is just one more thing on top of it wish you could read this stuff man really do miss you knock bye mate see you hopefully again one day :(
 
Oh man. Haven't read BL very closely recently but stumbled upon this terrible news in the Diphenidine thread in PD. Just awful. I remember Knock mostly from EADD, he was always there. Awesome guy.

I am very sad.

Rest in peace. :(
 
a_c edit to keep things on topic

Micheal stepped into the moderator role in EADD during a difficult time, I fully supported the choice but as I stood down quite suddenly felt I should step away and leave the new team to move things on.

I'm not going to claim I knew him well although I had always wanted to know him better, we exchanged a few PMs and I knew a little of his life.

The last message I had from him was unexpected, he was concerned for my welfare and took the time to reach out, I was truly moved by that and it just shows what a selfless person he was.

Safe journey Michael<3
 
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Allein said:
a_c edit to keep things on topic

Micheal stepped into the moderator role in EADD during a difficult time, I fully supported the choice but as I stood down quite suddenly felt I should step away and leave the new team to move things on.

I'm not going to claim I knew him well although I had always wanted to know him better, we exchanged a few PMs and I knew a little of his life.

The last message I had from him was unexpected, he was concerned for my welfare and took the time to reach out, I was truly moved by that and it just shows what a selfless person he was.

Safe journey Michael<3
Click to expand...

a_c edit to keep things on topic

We may not have known him well but we knew something of him, a different part of him, and got to "spent time with him" so to speak - that's what matters. I personally, don't think how long you knew a person counts because you can know a person a day n they can have an affect on you, he crossed your path in some way (I hope all this is not coming out wrong n if it is, I'm happy for it to be deleted off...)
The fact he reached out to you is special and you have a piece of him there. I have one E-mail (PM) n I'm going to keep it unless the server ever gets destroyed.
I can't begin to imagine the pain his family are going through n I also wish them some sort of peace n comfort

I was reading through his "Where is xxx" thread, how keen he was about it and keeping it updated. Think he mentioned that again not long after he'd stopped being a mod, the wanting that to be kept updated. So maybe you stepping aside when you stood down helped Knock find his feet as a mod?

Thank you, Knock, n RIP <3
 
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I don't know why I did this to myself. Why am here. Whatever cunt who made a remark about my attending his funeral being in the name of closure had better watch their fuckin mouth. Closure, what the fuck is that supposed to mean. I gotta get out of here. My chest feels like its about to implode.

Shine on you Crazy Diamond.
 
What strikes me about Knock...

Is what a caring person he was. I remember him telling us all his cat was ill, he actually paid £400 for an operation whereas most people would have probably had it put down. He showed care for human and animal welfare; think he was mostly vegetarian also. He was genuinely offended by any discriminative comments towards other humans and went out of his way to address and sort those comments out.

It's these qualities which I admire him for and ensure he is a person I will not forget.
 
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i didnt really chat to him all that much but when reading his posts i could tell he was a decent, down to earth lad. he always had a way of talking that was his own style and he did his own thing and gave his own views without compromising on what he really thought.

my thoughts go out to those who knew him personally.

rip knock
 
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