• Bluelight
    Shrine




    A memorial
    to Bluelighters
    who have passed away

RIP knock

parttime crackhead said:
Why don't you just say his online friends? Or his friends from a forum? You don't need to lie and say it's a music forum, you don't need to tell the whole truth and say it's bluelight.org.
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I think what was worrying folk was that if someone in the family innocently asks "oh where online is that then?", being fore-armed with "oh just some music site" or "facebook" might be better than having no answer & squirming about a bit.

I wasn't suggesting lets all lie just for the sake of it, & niether do I think it a good idea to divulge anything about BL without being 1000% certain that no-ones going to be shocked by that... & how can any of us be sure of that?
 
I think, to play it safe, just donating the money to the charity is plenty. I understand that his sister seeing that people cared enough to donate money could be a nice thing for her, but other than that why does anyone need to know? Isn't donating the money in itself good enough?

I'm beyond skint just now but I'll donate some money when I get paid.
 
ben so furry said:
it's got nothing to do with be ashamed of bl. If the family didn't know about what knock got up to behind closed doors then i don't think this is a good way or time to find out. I wouldn't want to find out this way. What seems normal to us may shock others. I'd hate to think that by doing something that seems innocent would in some cause distress or heaven forbid soil knocks memory for his family. They have got enough to worry about with the funeral coming up. We are doing our thing in memory of michael with the just giving page to demonstrate what he meant to us. Lets not cause any undue hurt to his family at a difficult time and leave it at that please.
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this
 
Thirded. I'm reasonably sure his family were unaware of his BL activities and quite probably only dimly aware at best of his lifestyle. I honestly don't think his family would appreciate visiting "that nice forum who donated so kindly on Michael's behalf" and finding several dozen posts about various chemicals up his backside, subsequent incoherent postings (his last post would surely be the first they checked... not one I'd like to be the introduction of my BL existence to family) and frequent mentions of - and indeed pix, I think - of his cock. I do believe his family are somewhat... "posh" and highly unlikely to approve of much of what he shared with us.

Donating alone is fine in my book. There's really no need to make a song and dance about it. Yes it would be great if the family could know quite how loved he was by so many "internet strangers" but I really don't think it's a good time for them to find out about the "other side" of his life.
 
Ben So Furry said:
It's got nothing to do with be ashamed of BL. If the family didn't know about what Knock got up to behind closed doors then I don't think this is a good way or time to find out. I wouldn't want to find out this way. What seems normal to us may shock others. I'd hate to think that by doing something that seems innocent would in some cause distress or heaven forbid soil Knocks memory for his family. They have got enough to worry about with the funeral coming up. We are doing our thing in memory of Michael with the just giving page to demonstrate what he meant to us. Lets not cause any undue hurt to his family at a difficult time and leave it at that please.
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"sigh" You're probably right. It may cause unnecessary hurt or colour view. His parents are in their 80s n they already lost one son now Knock they all don't need more shocks unnecessarily. We're doing our bit to help Knock n his family n that's what counts xxxx

T.E.S true. Of course we don't need thanks. I was not thinking that n I apologise if that's how it sounded. I meant if they wanted to say thanks (some people are that way). So sorry if it came out that I was thinking of us wanting to be thanked in any way xxxx

Sorry for so many 'edits' trying to reply to all these posts n not be ignorant but yes I totally agree donating is enough xxxx
 
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please edit that post Eve, & you Shambles, thanks xx Love ya darling ;)

... post editted out of respect for Knocks Sister/family, who have so kindly posted below <3

Probably a bit post-horse barn door but it's the thought that counts!

Perhaps anyone who might've also quoted Shams slightly too honest comment, or who might've quoted me, would be kind enough to do that same.
 
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No probably about it. :)
Anonymity is essential here.
Giving out your real name here is an act of trust, taking away someone's anonymity without consent would be a betrayal of that trust.

Eveleivibe said:
"sigh" You're probably right.
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Can I just say shocked I am at how generous the contributions to the charity are.

Considering the amount of cash I've chucked around on the forum and donated in recent months, I decided not to donate to the charity. But, being so touched by the heartfelt donations of other members (some at £50), in respect of that spirit of goodwill, I have now joined in and hope others do so.
 
Eveleivibe said:
Ahhhh I don't know about any of that, only had a codeine addiction n been on suboxone.
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The latter of which is especially good stuck up one's backside. Although - bewarned - it's about double as potent. If not more.

Somewhat off-topic but given this is Knock's RIP Thread it seems as appropriate as it gets <3
 
Ha! Well - technically - it is injecting... just that the orifice you are injecting into is pre-existing ;)

It's exactly the same process only involved no needle (for obvious reasons 8o). And many drugs - particular opies and psyches and stims - are significantly more potent up the tradesman's.

But that's quite enough plugging talk for an RIP Thread. Probably shouldn't have mentioned it at all but... I did. Ask in any other thread if you want actual details. (Although after your recent GIbberings posting I'm guessing plugging is the last thing you need right now :D;)<3)
 
Dear All, I am Michael's sister and I want to post some info and correct a couple of things.
My cousin and I have looked at this thread and we want to thank you for your caring for Michael.
He was a tremendously loving and generous son, brother, uncle, cousin, nephew and friend, as well as a contributor to this community. His family loved him very much and he loved us back.
He died last Friday in his home alone. Why? The post mortem showed no reason. But as you all well know he may have recklessly taken something which stopped his heart or his breathing.
It was a terrible waste. And our heartbreak over his loss will be with us for as long as we live.
We know he wanted to find a deeper purpose for his life. He felt deeply and thought deeply and wanted to make the world a better place.
A Few things:
We appreciate the generosity of those who have contributed to the MS society in his name. At the same time, it feels uncomfortable because his brother who is dealing with MS is a very private person and we don't want to draw attention to him.
About flowers: We have asked people not to send flowers. There will be wildflowers. Send your beautiful thoughts, and help make sure nobody else senselessly dies too young.
We have seen the posts about Michael being demoted as a mod. We know that would have been a blow to him. But we don't believe he harmed himself deliberately or because of anyone here. Please don't blame yourselves or one another.
Michael had pain he did not share.
My brother posted that I was a heroin addict for a while. Well that's just not true. I have never used heroin -- or any other opiate beyond co-codamol for toothache. I'm simply baffled how he got that idea. My cousin said he told her I'd written it in a family letter. I wish he'd talked to me about it so I could have set him right. Somehow that idea became a memory for him, but it was a false one.
I wish Michael had been more cautious. I wish he'd found his purpose, found his happiness in life. I will miss him always.
After you have had time to process and share, we humbly ask that you remove this thread and his profile. His family and close friends deserve privacy. I don't think Michael would want his parents or his niece and nephew to see this.
He valued the people in this community I know you valued him. Keep him in your hearts, stay safe and seek your happiness. That's what he would have wanted....

Peace
 
I can completely understand and respect that, and I hope that Michael's other online friends will honour your privacy and your wishes.

Thank you for sharing the information that you have shared; it must be hellishly difficult to do so, and neither I nor anybody else can even pretend to imagine how devastated you feel at the loss of your brother.

Thanks again and all the best to you.
 
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Request posted in other thread and closed it. I wish you and your family the best at this awful time.
 
My condolences to you, cant begin to comprehend how you and the family must be feeling. thankyou for giving us some insight, and we will respect your wishes

Peace and love
 
Thank you for posting. knock was an incredibly kind man and I can't begin to comprehend what you and your family must be going through right now but please know that we are all thinking of you.
 
Sister2Knock said:
Dear All, I am Michael's sister and I want to post some info and correct a couple of things.
My cousin and I have looked at this thread and we want to thank you for your caring for Michael.
He was a tremendously loving and generous son, brother, uncle, cousin, nephew and friend, as well as a contributor to this community. His family loved him very much and he loved us back.
He died last Friday in his home alone. Why? The post mortem showed no reason. But as you all well know he may have recklessly taken something which stopped his heart or his breathing.
It was a terrible waste. And our heartbreak over his loss will be with us for as long as we live.
We know he wanted to find a deeper purpose for his life. He felt deeply and thought deeply and wanted to make the world a better place.
A Few things:
We appreciate the generosity of those who have contributed to the MS society in his name. At the same time, it feels uncomfortable because his brother who is dealing with MS is a very private person and we don't want to draw attention to him.
About flowers: We have asked people not to send flowers. There will be wildflowers. Send your beautiful thoughts, and help make sure nobody else senselessly dies too young.
We have seen the posts about Michael being demoted as a mod. We know that would have been a blow to him. But we don't believe he harmed himself deliberately or because of anyone here. Please don't blame yourselves or one another.
Michael had pain he did not share.
My brother posted that I was a heroin addict for a while. Well that's just not true. I have never used heroin -- or any other opiate beyond co-codamol for toothache. I'm simply baffled how he got that idea. My cousin said he told her I'd written it in a family letter. I wish he'd talked to me about it so I could have set him right. Somehow that idea became a memory for him, but it was a false one.
I wish Michael had been more cautious. I wish he'd found his purpose, found his happiness in life. I will miss him always.
After you have had time to process and share, we humbly ask that you remove this thread and his profile. His family and close friends deserve privacy. I don't think Michael would want his parents or his niece and nephew to see this.
He valued the people in this community I know you valued him. Keep him in your hearts, stay safe and seek your happiness. That's what he would have wanted....

Peace
Click to expand...

Sister2Knock, thank you for taking the time to post here. We will certainly honor your request to delete this thread after people have had a chance to process his passing and anonymize his account. Your brother touched many people's lives through Bluelight and was a special member of this community. On behalf of all of us, we offer our deepest condolences to you and your family.

Kindest Regards,

SG
 
I'm so glad that we exchanged pm's before it was too late. I wish you could see how much people miss you and how much they thought of you.
R.I.P
 
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