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Psychological abuse thread

telepathetic

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I looked at them when they brought amateur hour and they're feeble mind games and told them to cut the shit. Did the trick.
haha man you dont even know. that would not have worked with the person im thinking of.

in fact that would make it much worse.
it might provoke a rage in the moment, or it might hatch a more sinister plan in their mind.

depending on how seriously they took you and who was around
 

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haha man you dont even know. that would not have worked with the person im thinking of.

in fact that would make it much worse.
it might provoke a rage in the moment, or it might hatch a more sinister plan in their mind.

depending on how seriously they took you and who was around
You'd be surprised. 😄
 

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Well see, I think psychopaths are necessary tbh. They’re not always bad.
I agree. The hero and the psychopath are cut from the same cloth. I think psychopaths have been crucial for our progress.
Most people who experience a ton of emotional empathy are not going to go in and make the very hard decisions that need to be made sometimes.
Definitely not. Decisions that sprung from emotions seldom end well, IMO. The world doesn't give a shit about emotions.
I would say I have a level of psychopathy…and I do moderate my behavior as much as I can. But there is a level where I do not take crap.
Yeah, I've been diagnosed with psychopathic traits, though not the physical aspect of psychopathy. Passed a certain stage the talking is over.
All psychopaths are narcissists, but not all narcissists are psychopaths.
Actually, psychopaths aren't. They are two very distinct personality disorders. Very few actually are, of those that are documented (from what I've gathered).
Agreed on the second statement though.
 

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Is it though????
I spewed that out to quickly. If you have a natural talent and disposition for manipulating and lying, I'd say yes.
The narcissists I've dealt with have been HORRENDOUSLY difficult to shut down. Once they feel threatened they have the biggest adult tantrums one can imagine, pulling out ALL their manipulative tricks.
I know. That's when I either walk away or tell them to STFU - but who's got the energy to piss against the wind? They feed of conflict.
It can be exceedingly difficult to walk away from, and I personally think it takes a really strong personality to pull it off easily.
I think if you learned to identify when the manipulation starts, it's much, MUCH easier. The shocked isn't there then, for example.
Oh 100%. Wayyy too easy, especially for personalities like mine. I am literally the opposite of a narcissist.
If you're the opposite, that's why you attract them. That would be my guess, based on their predatory behavior, atl east.
 

n3ophy7e

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They lack the structure to process emotions and empathy. That's why you need an scan to get diagnosed. Their brains are physically different.
Oh I see what you mean, the physical anatomy. Yes.

I majored in Psychopathy in my Psych degree, I love this shit :)
 

HOOH

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A victimhood narrative? LOL
The narcissist partner you mean?
It's not so easy you know. And when your battling your own victim mentality as you like to call it because of maybe childhood trauma it's hard not to feel victimized when it happens twice or maybe more than that...so imagine trying to get better and having another victim personality pull you back down through their well thought out tactics and patterns.... Plus in terms of leaving a psychological abuser it's not constructive to beat ourselves up about it. Better to acknowledge it forgive ourselves and ditch them...
I believe it's a process because it's complicated and doesn't happen over night black and white
The thing that separates the true victim from the victim persona I think is the sincerity. True Narcissists lack that and can in fact be really good at faking it.
Another edit: they may just feel so bad that they want to hurt others in a sick way. Honestly. It's hard to believe but it's true.
You know you could quote me if you'd reply to me... I wouldn't have even seen your message unless I had come to read schizoinfective's reply to me
Also I think the whole "narcissism" thing is kind of overused, there are plenty of mental issues that could cause relationship issues, not everything is due to some "charming handsome narcissist"
 

iTry91

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You know you could quote me if you'd reply to me... I wouldn't have even seen your message unless I had come to read schizoinfective's reply to me
Also I think the whole "narcissism" thing is kind of overused, there are plenty of mental issues that could cause relationship issues, not everything is due to some "charming handsome narcissist"

Sorry bout that sure I was struggling to see the screen at the time or just being lazy lol.
I don't agree though. I would have thought the same thing before this experience. He is calculated and I have been fooled too many times now it's extremely convincing. You don't know the lows he's went to to keep me here such as lying and manipulation tactics. Plus I think it's exactly that mentality of always making excuses for his behaviour and blaming myself that's kept me in it...also doubting my own sanity, start thinking I'll never be good enough then feeling ashamed because I know deep down I'm being used. It hurts because I love him and he knows this and uses tactics which I really believed were genuine for years.
I'm not talking about narcissistic traits -i have them too btw! But I mean having no empathy or unable to really care truly care about anyone else. Also to be comfortable in himself to take things I have told him that I haven't even told a psychologist or anyone in real life and use this as a weapon to keep me here all because he is terrified of being alone and actually having to pay for his own shit again, and not having constant attention.

Love is complicated that's why he doesn't get away with it with people who he doesn't have a close relationship with. I've seen some evil things come out and when someone's making you feel like shit for encouraging them to seek help for their 'depression' after 2&1/2years the excuse gets old. I am angry at myself for being so naive but equally astonished that someone can lie about so many hardships that makes my blood boil.
For a while when I was totally ignorant to, or just user to it, I feel like I gave up on myself and never really been the same since...oh and I even started picking some bad habits which I'll need to fix. I realised I had a big problem when I started meeting up with some old friends a couple years ago and they told me I was different, became a shell of my former self etc. I avoided them afterwards because I genuinely believed they hated me or looked down their noses at me, but really they had a clearer image of how my personality was being dominated.
 
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also doubting my own sanity
This. The love-bombing, the hot and cold play, everything, is to lead you to this point. Shake the foundations of your reality and make yu doubt yourself. That's how many of these malevolent underhand cunts work. By this point, they have you where they want you.
I'm not talking about narcissistic traits -i have them too btw! But I mean having no empathy or unable to really care truly care about anyone else.
This kind of manipulative behavior, always emotional and abusive, is textbook NPD, narcissistic personality disorder. I feel so certain about this because I have two in my family (that I haven't spoken to in a decade). It's such dirtbag behavior.
I am angry at myself for being so naive.
My sister was the victim of a cunt like this. She's also doubting herself, feeling stupid. I try to tell her not to, but I guess time needs to help.

I hope your doing alright now, or at least better @iTry91 . Breaks my heart to read stuff like this. Being fucked over by someone you love leaves it's marks.
 

iTry91

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Thanks @tubgirl.jpg it definitely does! I'm glad your sister got away and is on the mend! I'm sure she will be stronger for it eventually.
I've got another painful journey ahead (life's a bitch lol) but hoping it will be worth it. I broke up with him not long ago but stupidly took him back thinking that the space would have made things better. But the war never ends with people like that and no matter how convincing they are...nothing ever changes and the true nastiness comes to light once they feel like it, for whatever reason.
 

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Thanks @tubgirl.jpg it definitely does!
Good man.
I'm glad your sister got away and is on the mend! I'm sure she will be stronger for it eventually.
Me too. Thank you :)
I've got another painful journey ahead (life's a bitch lol) but hoping it will be worth it.
A vindictive slap-happy bitch for sure. I hope the rocky road ahead won't be so rocky for you.
I broke up with him not long ago but stupidly took him back thinking that the space would have made things better.
I think we've all been there at some point. Love can be treacherous.
But the war never ends with people like that and no matter how convincing they are...nothing ever changes and the true nastiness comes to light once they feel like it, for whatever reason.
I feel exactly the same way. The moment you give them resistance, they come alive. Tenacious fuckers. I think it's because they're losing the control they've cultivated, and NPD's aren't exactly wholesome people with sound defense mechanisms or coping skills in place. And that's usually when they can get really dangerous physically, depending on disposition and inclination towards violence.
The people I knew (beside family members) were people I hung out with because of geography, school. But as soon as I graduated, I cut one of them out. I shared a flat with the other one for over a year, but after that I was done with him. I've got enough problems managing myself, I can't look after a megalomaniac man-child too. Same with my sisters ex - he had to go.

But it's crazy the control they get. My sister is tough as nails. She never took shit, ever. But this pathetic man broke her down.

Hmu if you should ever feel the need to vent or talk. I wish you all the best man.
 

G_Chem

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Have y'all ever thought that maybe you were so involved in your victimhood narratives (not saying that victimhood exists, but everything is within one's perception) that you forgot you could just distance yourself from it?

Like Alan Watts said, "you are under no obligation to be the same person you were 5 minutes ago"

You love playing the troll don’t you? Lol.


Part of the way these people operate is by knowing the right things to do and say to keep the victim around. They also tend to go for people with weaknesses that can be exploited.

Great Watts quote but applies very little here.

-GC
 

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See, I think with some psychopaths (sounds like he may be one) you can have a satisfying relationship IF they are willing to try and not be manipulative all the time…but some are just keen on that.
Definitely. But instead of getting high on oxytocin and feeling love, it's a choice for a psychopath - a choice to invest and dedicate themselves to someone.
One of the most moral people I know is a diagnosed psychopath, though she calls it code of conduct, and not morals. She's been married for 9 years. Nobody would ever suspect her of being a psychopath. She really opened my eyes as to how completely inaccurate portrayals of psychopaths are.

Not all psychopaths are manipulative even if all (functioning) psychopaths by necessity has had to learn to manipulative and feign being neurotypical.
 

telepathetic

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have you guys ever seen what happens when you give some with NPD/ASPD (not really sure which in this case) mdma? they don't get empathetic, they don't really open up, they will literally hit the floor in hedonistic moans off small amounts,

maybe they lacked a liver enzyme, idk
 

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have you guys ever seen what happens when you give some with NPD/ASPD (not really sure which in this case) mdma? they don't get empathetic, they don't really open up, they will literally hit the floor in hedonistic moans off small amounts,

maybe they lacked a liver enzyme, idk
Psychopaths (part of ASPD) have a physical defect, structural "damage" to the part of the brain that processes emotions and also is involved in empathy.
They also don't pick up oxytocin as neurotypicals. So yeah, for a psychopath at least, MDMA does nothing but give physical pleasure and euphoria.
But it can't produce emotions in them since they lack the tool that makes emotions in the brain.

Sociopaths and NPD's are another thing though, as they have emotions, conscience and so forth, do very much more stunted that NT's.
 
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