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☮ Social ☮ PD Social Talk Thread: If 2020 Was the Dumpster, Can 2021 Be the Fire?

JackARoe

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Going through old posts near march last year bought back memories of those early lsd trips before i lost alot of the magic. I think i have alot of magic lost even with the breaks i took compared to those 150 ug trips i really did enter the same super mind blowing realms a few times before i really abused the lsd last year but did get various trips back when i did take longer breaks

I think we have to define loss of magic. Is it lack of insight? Lack of satisfaction? The chemicals always work. But I can say I don't get the mind blowing insights like when I was younger as they are integrated into my consciousness. Sort of like I am already there in a way. I get them everyday from regular things. So going from a normal waking consciousness to taking LSD the first few times are mind blowing and then if I keep doing that it becomes routine. So I think that is what we call the loss of magic. But magic is everywhere. Not sure why we became so immune to seeing it. LIke how does ignorance of that beauty remain so stuck in place with people? With me? It fades.

I have said a few times if you have your head on straight (like most here) and keep tripping it will just get boring, rotuine. It is a tool but has it's limits. Hell even DMT will stop working on a person that does it too much in it's own way. Or the dimensions get boring. lol So cutting back and tripping after reading books, living life by taking in different stimuli works better.

Just simple logic. Psychedelics are strong and can knock a person off his center. But a person that is aleady centered it just becomes commonplace and our minds look to other things here in regular consciousness to stimulate us. Then we sleep. lol (to recharge)

I am talking regular psychedelics. Certainly not dissociatives. I believe the loss of magic from dissociatives is more sinister. Scarier. Eh, not sure though. I have no real experience with that.
 
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phenethylo J

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Ended up not doing it last night was kinda tired and didn't want my sleep schedule to get messed up again. Just put the syringe in bag and put it inside a bottle. Probably will do it a little later this afternoon or evening.

Ended up doing some 2c-p 3 times in a week near the middle-end of last month when I was still on my thc break. Was fairly low doses just snorted 1-2mgs followed by multiple sub mg redoses.
 

TripSitterNZ

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Stanislov grof books his trip report of 5 meo dmt is so amazing so here it is for people to read who don't own it.

The beginning of the experience was very sudden and dramatic. I was hit by a thunderbolt of immense power that instantly shattered and dissolved my everyday reality. I lost all contact with the surrounding world, which completely disappeared as if by magic. In the past, whenever I had taken a high-dose of psychedelics, I liked to lie down and make myself comfortable. This time, any such concerns were irrelevant because I lost awareness of my body, as well as of the environment. After the session, I was told that after taking a couple of drags, I sat there for several minutes like a sculpture, holding the pipe near my mouth. Cristina and Paul had to take the pipe from my hand and put my body in a reclining position on the couch.

In all my previous sessions, I had always maintained basic orientation. I knew who I was, where I was, and why I was having unusual experiences. This time all this dissolved in a matter of seconds. The awareness of my everyday existence, my name, my whereabouts, and my life disappeared as if by magic. Stan Grof … California … United States … planet Earth … these concepts faintly echoed for a few moments like dreamlike images on the far periphery of my consciousness and then faded away altogether. I tried hard to remember myself of all the existence of the realities I used to know, but they suddenly did not make any sense.

In all my previous psychedelic sessions there always had been some rich specific content. The experiences related to my present lifetime – the story of my childhood, infancy, birth, and embryonal life – or to various themes from the transpersonal domain – my past life experiences, images from human history, archetypal visions of deities or demons, or visits to various mythological domains. This time, none of these dimensions seemed to exist, let alone manifest. My only reality was a mass of radiant swirling energy of immense proportions that seemed to contain all of existence in a condensed and entirely abstract form. I became Consciousness facing the Absolute.

It had the brightness of myriad suns, yet it was not the same continuum with any light I knew from everyday life. It seemed to be pure consciousness, intelligence, and creative energy transcending all polarities. It was infinite and finite, divine and demonic, terrifying and ecstatic, creative and destructive - all that and much more. I had no concept, no categories for what I was witnessing. I could not maintain a sense of separate existence in the face of such a force. My ordinary identity was shattered and dissolved; I became one with the Source. In retrospect, I believe I must have experienced the Dharmakaya, the Primary Clear Light, which according to the Tibetan Book of the Dead, the Bardo Thödol, appears at the moment of our death. It bore some resemblance to what I encountered in my first LSD session, but it was much more over whelming and completely extinguished any sense of my separate identity.

My encounter with the Absolute lasted approximately 20 minutes of clock time, as measured by external observers. As far as I was concerned, during the entire duration of my experience, time ceased to exist and lost any meaning whatsoever. After what seemed like an eternity, concrete dreamlike images and concepts began to form in my experiential field. I started intuiting fleeting images of a cosmos with galaxies, stars, and planets, Later, I gradually visualized a solar system, and within it the Earth, with large continents.

Initially, these images were very distant and unreal, but as the experience continued, I started to feel that these realities might actually have objective existence. Gradually, this crystallized further into the images of the United States and California. The last to emerge was the sense of my everyday identity and the awareness of my present life. At first, the contact with the ordinary reality was extremely faint. I recognized where I was and what the circumstances were. But I was sure that I had taken a dose that was excessive and that I was actually dying. For some time, I believed I was experiencing the bardo, the intermediate state between my present life and my birth in the next incarnation, as it is described in the Tibetan texts.

As I was regaining more solid contact with reality, I reached a point where I knew that I was coming down from a psychedelic session and that I would survive this experiment. I was lying there, still experiencing myself as dying, but now without the sense that my present life was threatened. My dying seemed to be related to scenes from my previous incarnations. I found myself in many dramatic situations happening in different parts of the world throughout the centuries, all of them dangerous and painful. Various groups of muscles in my body were twitching and shaking, as my body was hurting and dying in these different contexts. However, as my karmic history played out in my body, I was in a state of profound bliss, completely detached from all these dramas, which persisted even after all the specific content disappeared from my experience.

- Stanislav Grof, "When the Impossible Happens: Adventures in Non-Ordinary Reality." (2006)

The czechs are really on another level with psychedelic thepary a must watch movie learnt a few things about how to anchor back into reality after many intense trips.

 

phenethylo J

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Do find nasal to be a bit more stimulating; find that with 2cs as well. Ended up not doing it yesterday either. Mind actually get around to dosing it in a little bit before it gets too late. How about how long would you say it stays good in water. I know alcohol is better long tern storage
 

TripSitterNZ

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Im going to try call it a end to my psychedelic career and focus on achieving non duality with the methods given to us 5000 B.C by dattatreya. Had some powerful experinces doing mantras for hours on end and reading the avadhuta gita. I realized what i labelled as my worst trip i reframed it and understood it clearly now and look as one of the most powerful experinces of my life which is neither good or bad it was simply to powerful for me to handle at that point in my life with a terrible setting and set. But the power of it took me beyond this physical plane into hyperspace on that acid and not sure if i can call it psychosis since i did come back down quite fast from the highest peak level of it where i had no control for 15 minutes. But looking back on it taught me many things and i could not let go of my attachments so i suffered terribly. It was the most poweful encounter i had with all aspects of the unified field while i believed myself to go to hell i just could not get through the gate to the other side transcending duality instead my attachment got me stuck there til shiva appeared and showed me meditation was the right path.

any more drugs is just going to hinder me i see that now. Discovering the secrets to ego death at any time i wanted on a trip would be a bit foretelling i should no longer trip since i have learned everything possible from it.
 

Xorkoth

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I think that's a good idea, at least for the foreseeable future. I gave psychedelics up for 3 years, without ever intending for it to be permanent. At some point it felt right again, and since then I have had valuable trips of a different nature (lighter trips to help me stay in touch with the psychedelic state and my inner child), and my relationship with them has been healthy. I really do think that trying to keep hammering away at ego loss becomes detrimental. I would welcome a future ego loss experience if it happens, but it's not something I have any immediate plans to seek out again.
 

TripSitterNZ

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even ego death is simply counter to the path to true awakening. Meditation and the meditator do not exist anyway in true non-dual awareness neither does the mind so there is nothing to try kill wipe away or cleanse. the self is already illumined by itself of itself. Meditating is technically shameful since it means said meditator has forgotten their true nature.

But if you do not know you have to meditate to finally realize the self then there is no more meditation. These mantra meditations are pretty dam powerful keep getting more insights into past things and my trips integration more. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avadhuta_Gita this book is really fucking amazing.

I don't expect to gain moshka in this lifetime since i have many worldly attachments still but next time i come around i believe i will. But i will sure try incase i do.

Trying to train that single minded laser focus is hard work. Some people have very rarely become totally liberated by gurus in the past from a mantra energy transfer since they were so primed for it. Imagine that some guru says a mantra next thing you know your totally gone in the white infinite light of self. That still blows my mind that acutally happens.
 

Shadow Cat

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I lost my voice a week ago and i dont really have soar throat but some congestion going on. I haven't tripped or done Ecstacy in three days. In fact no Dope either just taking the Methadone and trying to get a grip of my addiction i really went off the deep end for awhile and i thank all off my friends and loved ones for putting up with my wacky behavior. I've deff crossed a line into HEAVY drug abuse i dont even know exactly when it happened but i need to dry out for awhile. Im not gonna state time frames cuz i just get bummed out when i fail. Going to make a cup of tea right now have a light breaking took 40mgs, may go back to work today i have to call my boss.

Thankfully I dont feel depressed after that MDMA binge which was pretty outrageous and yeah fun but it took a toll on me physically for sure and if i wadnt on such high doses of Opioids i probably wouldn't have functioned as well. Saw my daughter the other day and that was nice i gotta stay alive for her and my Mom they love the fuck outta me. I may come off as wild man but im a truly loving soul and extremely empathetic towards others. When i love somebody i will do whatever i have to and protect them, i need to start treating my body with that same respect. Im gonna be okay just have to slow down and deleting all those numbers and friends i was doing dope with helped, i was near the hood yesterday got cravings and couldn't even call anyone thought about cold copping and then talked myself out of it.

Appreciate my lady friend for teaching me that block and delete method its helping me get time together i mean its only 3 days but when you been using tonthe level I've been its big deal just stopping...really miss her and hope she reaches out to me someday i forgot to pay my phonebill like dumbass so im using text app and wifi, what an a-hole if i said how much i blew on drugs its really frustrating.
 

Kaden_Nite

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I gauge my own wellness by thinking: if I had to battle myself right now (like an evil, alternate universe version of myself) would I have both the physical and mental charisma required to come out victorious?

Some days I'm not so sure. Today is one of those days..
 

Buzz Lightbeer

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I gauge my own wellness by thinking: if I had to battle myself right now (like an evil, alternate universe version of myself) would I have both the physical and mental charisma required to come out victorious?

Some days I'm not so sure. Today is one of those days..
Two KARATE ASTRONAUTS battling it out, it'd make way for some interesting dynamics for sure.
 

Xorkoth

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Man BTC has taken 0ff today, looks like it's about to spike hard again. The BTC mining stocks are growing around 3x as much as BTC, their movements mirror it exactly but are quite a bit more extreme, I guess because their value is much lower. The one that I bought on margin and sold for a loss the other week grew by 300% this week, while BTC grew by like 20%. Wish I'd have sold some of my other stuff to cover the temporary loss when they hit me with a margin call, I would have made $4,000 in a week. But whatcha gonna do? Hindsight and all that.

However I did buy 8 shares of that stock today, sold a position on an ETF that has been super stagnant. If I can make 10-20% I'll be happy, help me recoup some of my losses. Or I may just hold onto it longer term. However I expect that once BTC finds a new level, the excitement will recede and some of that BTC mining stock value will bleed out as people sell to take profits. So probably best to pick an exit amount and take some profit and put it back into ETFs or mutual funds.
 

TripSitterNZ

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Moved today and right outside where i live is literally a patch of dried up shrooms wtf lol. Reintegrating back into society so felt very good and happy im going to stay sober and found something new to live for.


Met alot of mature students at the uni today and i surpised myself by been one of the most social walking up to many strangers and realized alot of people have alot of social anxiety. I think those trips really did help me in some way to be peace with myself and removed alot of my social anxiety i was very surpised at how easy it was for me now to just talk to many random strangers. I realized that by removing myself to the rural where i had not many people to interact with anymore in my road to recovery over the last few years isolated myself socially to much from the greater society out there. Thats why i kept turning back to drugs but now i have found something better to do and will keep sober.
 

Shadow Cat

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Had a good day at work yesterday about to go back now, this is at same jon i had since last year tommrow after my shift im gonna work another trial shift at this other other restaurant for a higher position as suis chef which is little nervewracking. I've been staying sober besides the Methadone and plan on it for the foreseeable future. Im sorta not qualifiéd for the position at this other place I've always just been line cook but you gotta go for it someday, its alot more money...feel tired as fuck i slept like maybe 6 hours but now that im no hammering stims my past life style is really catching up. I will be okay tho just gotta keep moving getting dressed for work about to leave, have good day everyone.
 

psy997

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Man BTC has taken 0ff today, looks like it's about to spike hard again. The BTC mining stocks are growing around 3x as much as BTC, their movements mirror it exactly but are quite a bit more extreme, I guess because their value is much lower. The one that I bought on margin and sold for a loss the other week grew by 300% this week, while BTC grew by like 20%. Wish I'd have sold some of my other stuff to cover the temporary loss when they hit me with a margin call, I would have made $4,000 in a week. But whatcha gonna do? Hindsight and all that.

However I did buy 8 shares of that stock today, sold a position on an ETF that has been super stagnant. If I can make 10-20% I'll be happy, help me recoup some of my losses. Or I may just hold onto it longer term. However I expect that once BTC finds a new level, the excitement will recede and some of that BTC mining stock value will bleed out as people sell to take profits. So probably best to pick an exit amount and take some profit and put it back into ETFs or mutual funds.

Everyone is still talking about a top in the next 3-10 weeks, a big 30-45% correction, and then a final run later in the year for the cycle top, btw.
 

TripSitterNZ

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coming up three weeks sober. My HPPD is pretty extreme but im working to ground myself in my body and the earth. Been social really helps and well im a bit out there myself people are really friendly and kind around these parts. I swear music is somehow sounding better as the days go on maybe since im getting out more in the world my mind is getting more fresh and sharper and can appreciate life more.

this is the longest i been sober in over a year. sometimes the urge to do drugs is there. But i will probably break the sobriety spell for a few social drinks but try control my drinking to just a few drinks and not the half bottle of whiskey like i would sometimes drink in the past.

Life is the trip and while i won't be returning to base line time and space anytime soon i think if i really do abstain from psychedelic drugs i will one day be able to return to the ground how many ever years that takes and digest and integrate all those experinces over my life.

The meditation and mantra affirmations do enough for me to feel connected to the other world each day. Going to sign up to the gym next week and get my physical health back.
 
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