kickitnow
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2016
- Messages
- 75
I've been using heroin on and off for 8 years now. I've been physically addicted many times, varying in severity, but there have also recently been 3-4 month stints when I touched nothing harder than a beer. The most recent of these was feb-may of this year. I got married overseas. Sadly, from the minute I got home I've binged since then to the point where i was using 1/4 a gram daily. This costs $150 in local currency.(I know right).
Money has always been my trigger, created in the days of knee-deep desperate addiction. I need to put together 10k to get on with my life. (Immigration bill for my wife. So we can live with together. I miss her - another excuse I use to get on). The stress of this is why I use, and using is, obviously counter productive to this goal, compounding that stress. Vicious circle. I've blown every fortnightly paycheck on smack since may. The exception being the current one.
In terms of Withdrawal, I'm no stranger to it. I made it to 5 days before using to avoid insomnia so I could work. Used for a week. Then went through WD again. Lasted 7 days, the withdrawals were handled with valium,loperamide and grit. Used again, and here I am on the end of day 3, fighting cravings but with no physical withdrawal symptoms and about $800 in the bank.
I know that if I can kick my habit now, with the money I am so blessed to be earning (junkies make great salesmen)
I can reach my goal in no time. I just kind of lucked a gentle taper off the shit so there is never going to be a better time to quit than now. I genuinely love my wife, and dont want to being her into a world I'd already convinced myself I'd left behind.
I'm a smart guy, a loving husband that wants to do good and be good.
but I really want that needle in my arm.
please, help
Money has always been my trigger, created in the days of knee-deep desperate addiction. I need to put together 10k to get on with my life. (Immigration bill for my wife. So we can live with together. I miss her - another excuse I use to get on). The stress of this is why I use, and using is, obviously counter productive to this goal, compounding that stress. Vicious circle. I've blown every fortnightly paycheck on smack since may. The exception being the current one.
In terms of Withdrawal, I'm no stranger to it. I made it to 5 days before using to avoid insomnia so I could work. Used for a week. Then went through WD again. Lasted 7 days, the withdrawals were handled with valium,loperamide and grit. Used again, and here I am on the end of day 3, fighting cravings but with no physical withdrawal symptoms and about $800 in the bank.
I know that if I can kick my habit now, with the money I am so blessed to be earning (junkies make great salesmen)
I can reach my goal in no time. I just kind of lucked a gentle taper off the shit so there is never going to be a better time to quit than now. I genuinely love my wife, and dont want to being her into a world I'd already convinced myself I'd left behind.
I'm a smart guy, a loving husband that wants to do good and be good.
but I really want that needle in my arm.
please, help
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