My therapist dropped me cause I couldn't say I'll quit all drugs forever

[Mycophile]

The point is you're not going to find any psychiatrist that's fine with you abusing drugs. Good luck.

I never said that that was what I was looking for, and actually, I WANTED A THERAPIST WHO WOULD HELP ME WITH THAT AND OTHER ISSUES.

I wanted a therapist who would help me with my drug issues and my other issues, who would help MOTIVATE me to use fewer substances but not be an asshole about it and just say "tell me right now you will quit all drugs forever or I won't help you."

The guy claimed to be a drug counselor and also a therapist, but said he can't help people with more than one issue at once, and that's retarded.

I think there are different types of therapists.

I had a therapist for 12 years who was excellent and he wasn't "ok" with me abusing drugs, but he did not refuse to work with me, so you are wrong there.

He would tell me what he thought and try his best to help me in all areas of my life and not refuse to work with me because I was not 100% sober or would not tell him right there and then that I would never EVER have a single drink or use another drug again.

Good therapists are out there.

Also, he was not a psychiatrist but a therapist.

It's not always like you describe, and it's better to have someone be willing to help you than have no help.


You know what one of the last things he said before I left his office was??

I said "well I DO want to stop using substances so often though...." and he cut me off and said:

"oh No No...YOU CAN'T DO IT BY YOURSELF!!"

Then 10 minutes later he's telling me to leave his office cause he can't help me hahahhaa.

So...DON'T DO IT BY MYSELF...but you, who have listed on your resume that you are a drug abuse counselor and a therapist who helps with all these issue won't help me.

Right.

So what did he want me to do??

Basically, he just wanted me to find someone else who could do what he CLAIMS he has the ability to do cause he was too pathetic and incompetent to want to personally deal with me.

I STILL want to learn to use fewer substances and have been doing SOMEWHAT better the past few weeks on my own, but I STILL won't say I'll NEVER use another drug.

So I should be FORBIDDEN to have help from ANY therapist if I will not say "I will NEVER EVER use another drug again starting right now?" ESPECIALLY considering I have SEVERAL issues in my life that are not drug related I could use help with?

FUCK THAT.

That's wrong and I stand by it.

There are great therapists out there who WILL help people like me who are stuck in this in-between kind of situation with a bunch of problems that are not only related to drug use, just not this pathetic excuse for a therapist who said "I can't do it alone" but won't help me either...


It should, according to you and some others, be a situation of "110% commit yourself to never touching a single drug again or you get ZERO help?"

No, that's wrong.

 

[Mycophile]

I think people just think that "therapists must always be right" because if they are telling you have to quit drugs or whatever then obviously they must be intelligent, but this guy just wasn't. I have had therapists be willing to work with me even when I was not committing to 100% complete sobriety and will certainly find others.

A therapist should not be unwilling to help you with ANY problem you have if you will not 100% say that you'll never use any drug again. Saying you'll work on it and need help with other things in the meantime should be enough. WE PAY THEM afterall.

There is no clause in any kind of patient/therapist handbook that says "patient must be willing to commit to complete sobriety or else therapist should deny them any and all help with all other life issues." It just doesn't exist.

As mentioned, my own mother is a therapist a thinks this guy behaved very poorly.

The irony of saying "you can't quit drugs on your own" when I said i really DID want to work on it, but then saying "but I won't help you" is quite strong.

He wasn't right about how he treated me.

 

[Mafioso]

claimed to be BOTH a substance disorder counselor AND a therapist, able to help with multiple issues.

Then after seeing him it turned out his whole fucking resume meant "yeah, all those issues...ONE AT A TIME INDEPENDENTLY ONLY...and if you have more than one of them that are bad then he's not equipped to handle it

Most substance disorder counselors will drop you if you are still using, as many believe it's unethical for a variety of reasons- mostly that it's enabling and that it's charging for a service that is impossible to provide in the current condition. I know it sounds odd- why can't you stop a disease(addiction) while treating it, why do you have to stop using the drug first-- wouldn't that be part of the treatment?

It is, but it's the first stage of treatment and in order to progress, one has to make it past acute withdrawals and start learning to deal with post-acute withdrawal, cravings, and normal life stress and emotions without drugs. These aren't things that can be learned while drug use is still in progress. It is like trying to treat a knife wound while the person is still being stabbed.

It is not that unlikely that he is qualified to treat both substance use disorders and mental health disorders, but it may be very likely he is not qualified to treat medical detox which may be needed if you are still using drugs. Either way, if you find a counselor, especially a SUD counselor, willing to take your money while you are still using drugs then I'd run the other way because the guy us either a hack or a con of not both.

 

[Mycophile]

Most substance disorder counselors will drop you if you are still using, as many believe it's unethical for a variety of reasons- mostly that it's enabling and that it's charging for a service that is impossible to provide in the current condition. I know it sounds odd- why can't you stop a disease(addiction) while treating it, why do you have to stop using the drug first-- wouldn't that be part of the treatment?

It is, but it's the first stage of treatment and in order to progress, one has to make it past acute withdrawals and start learning to deal with post-acute withdrawal, cravings, and normal life stress and emotions without drugs. These aren't things that can be learned while drug use is still in progress. It is like trying to treat a knife wound while the person is still being stabbed.

It is not that unlikely that he is qualified to treat both substance use disorders and mental health disorders, but it may be very likely he is not qualified to treat medical detox which may be needed if you are still using drugs. Either way, if you find a counselor, especially a SUD counselor, willing to take your money while you are still using drugs then I'd run the other way because the guy us either a hack or a con of not both.

I have absolutely no acute withdrawals to anything and he knew this.

My biggest drugs of abuse are/were dexadrine, Kratom and alcohol.

I had very mild WD from Dexadrine and Kratom and this guy didn't even know about the Kratom, and I knew I could get rid of those withdrawals in days. I have never been physically addicted to alcohol.

So none of it was about that.

I needed no medical detox.

What he was was incompetent to deal with all the other issues I have because I needed a lot more than help with addictive habits/drugs but with anxiety issues, depression, and lots of other stuff.

He told me "I usually only treat people who have one major problem" and he was basically admitting to be in over his head and as mentioned, my mother is a very good psychoanalyst and she told me she agrees that what he said was VERY messed up and wrong and that almost everyone who has these issues has them co-morbidly and that he was in the wrong.

Again, you guys don't know the whole situation and are giving this guy too much credit.

While YES, PART OF IT was his saying I would not flat out say "I'll NEVER use another drug again" overall he stopped seeing me cause he admitted "I would not know where to start" with all the different problems I wanted help with.

I HAVE seen therapists before who were not substance abuse counselers, but who were there to help me with all my other shit, and really, MOST of what I have to deal with in life is NOT drug related, and they continued to do so while knowing I was using certain drugs, and they were NOT hacks or cons.

They would tell me their opinions that I needed to use less of this drug or that one, but because they were primarily therapists and NOT drug counselors continued to see me.

And therein again lies the irony because this guy said "you can't do this on your own" (meaning stop using drugs) but "I can't help you" and still said "I think you need another therapist, but they also need to be good with drugs and addictions."


So, what sense does that make??!!

All in all, he was saying he wouldn't help me, but recommended someone else who is basically just like him (but BETTER haha) to help me with my issues.

HE WAS A HACK.

In fact, because of how much of a hack he was I will NOT follow his advice.

IF I actually look for a new therapist I think I will NOT look for them to be any kind of substance abuse counseler and just a normal therapist so this kind of thing will not be an issue: they can help me with other stuff and NOT feel conflicted about whether or not I am using any drugs (even though it would be better for me to NOT be using many substances...)

This idea that a therapist should NOT help you with ANY issues, be they depression or anxiety or whatever, so long as you are using ANY drugs, is IMO 100% bullshit.

A therapist can still help someone with other problems and talk to them even if they are not 100% sober.

The therapy might not be as effective, and some people would consider them to be enabling, but I think helping a person who is not 100% sober is better than leaving them behind with nowhere to turn like this guy.

I've had therapists like that before who don't turn their back on you for not being 100% sober, and they exist without being hacks or cons.

 

[Mafioso]

had very mild WD from Dexadrine and Kratom and this guy didn't even know about the Kratom, and I knew I could get rid of those withdrawals in days.

That is, by definition, acute withdrawal. Even an alcohol hangover would be considered acute withdrawal, although probably mild at most.

I have never been physically addicted to alcohol.

As stated above, one does not need to be physically addicted- beside the point though, you have just admitted to using other drugs still which makes it nearly impossible(and potentially unethical) to make any sort of diagnosis as the signs/symptoms of both disorders are often indistinguishable.

So none of it was about that.

It seems to be largely, if not entirely about that... your definitiveness here seems to agree as well., imo.

I needed no medical deto

Probably not, but he may not be licensed or qualified to do so. I'm not here to defend the man, but you are making many attacks against what I understand to be industry standard.

What he was was incompetent to deal with all the other issues I have because I needed a lot more than help with addictive habits/drugs but with anxiety issues, depression, and lots of other stuff.

Detoxing, whether medical or not, someone who has co-occurring disorders could potentially require medical staff/doctor. Not saying medical detox, but did he make any referrals to you?

He told me "I usually only treat people who have one major problem" and he was basically admitting to be in over his head and as mentioned, my mother is a very good psychoanalyst and she told me she agrees that what he said was VERY messed up and wrong and that almost everyone who has these issues has them co-morbidly and that he was in the wrong.

Maybe he was really admitting his incompetence, or that you're in need of help greater than he could provide. If that's what he was saying, I don't see that as unethical, as most disorders occur on a spectrum and treating multiple severe disorders would present a much greater challenge than one severe and one mild disorder.

Again, you guys don't know the whole situation and are giving this guy too much credit

We don't, but you are also being extremely defensive and not being willing to admit any wrong or see any one else's perspective. NOt trying to be rude here, just something I try to remind myself is that when I start wondering if it's everyone else if there isn't something I'm missing that other's have caught on to.

While YES, PART OF IT was his saying I would not flat out say "I'll NEVER use another drug again" overall he stopped seeing me cause he admitted "I would not know where to start" with all the different problems I wanted help with.

I HAVE seen therapists before who were not substance abuse counselers, but who were there to help me with all my other shit, and really, MOST of what I have to deal with in life is NOT drug related, and they continued to do so while knowing I was using certain drugs, and they were NOT hacks or cons.

So this takes us back to that start, where you were denying that your drug use had any bearing on his willingness to work with you.

If you've seen other therapist who are not qualified to treat substance use disorders, they either were unaware, or did you a disservice by not making a referral.

And therein again lies the irony because this guy said "you can't do this on your own" (meaning stop using drugs) but "I can't help you" and still said "I think you need another therapist, but they also need to be good with drugs and addictions."


So, what sense does that make??!!

It seems he was trying to tell you as gently as possible that you've apparently grown hostile, or at the least cynical towards him and all that he has to say. He is saying that you need help, but he can't be the one to help you because of the relationship issue- how can he help if you doubt his credibility and can't get along? When he says another therapist who is good with addiction, he means not more of the one's like you've had in the past who either did you a disservice or were themselves unethical/incompetent.

He is saying he thinks your drug problem and mental health issues are serious, that he believes you need help for both, but that because of the failure of you two to get along, he will be unable to help you- therefor you should find someone who is qualified who you also get along with.

IF I actually look for a new therapist I think I will NOT look for them to be any kind of substance abuse counseler and just a normal therapist so this kind of thing will not be an issue: they can help me with other stuff and NOT feel conflicted about whether or not I am using any drugs (even though it would be better for me to NOT be using many substances...)

This idea that a therapist should NOT help you with ANY issues, be they depression or anxiety or whatever, so long as you are using ANY drugs, is IMO 100% bullshit.

A therapist can still help someone with other problems and talk to them even if they are not 100% sober.

I've had therapists like that before, and they exist

Again, I think you and/or the therapist will be doing you a disservice to do this... It is honestly like finding a doctor that will treat your migraine without concern of what may be causing it or making it worse.


Best of luck, I meant no disrespect despite my honesty.

 

[Mycophile]

That is, by definition, acute withdrawal. Even an alcohol hangover would be considered acute withdrawal, although probably mild at most.

As stated above, one does not need to be physically addicted- beside the point though, you have just admitted to using other drugs still which makes it nearly impossible(and potentially unethical) to make any sort of diagnosis as the signs/symptoms of both disorders are often indistinguishable.

It seems to be largely, if not entirely about that... your definitiveness here seems to agree as well., imo.

Probably not, but he may not be licensed or qualified to do so. I'm not here to defend the man, but you are making many attacks against what I understand to be industry standard.

Detoxing, whether medical or not, someone who has co-occurring disorders could potentially require medical staff/doctor. Not saying medical detox, but did he make any referrals to you?

Maybe he was really admitting his incompetence, or that you're in need of help greater than he could provide. If that's what he was saying, I don't see that as unethical, as most disorders occur on a spectrum and treating multiple severe disorders would present a much greater challenge than one severe and one mild disorder.

We don't, but you are also being extremely defensive and not being willing to admit any wrong or see any one else's perspective. NOt trying to be rude here, just something I try to remind myself is that when I start wondering if it's everyone else if there isn't something I'm missing that other's have caught on to.

So this takes us back to that start, where you were denying that your drug use had any bearing on his willingness to work with you.

If you've seen other therapist who are not qualified to treat substance use disorders, they either were unaware, or did you a disservice by not making a referral.


It seems he was trying to tell you as gently as possible that you've apparently grown hostile, or at the least cynical towards him and all that he has to say. He is saying that you need help, but he can't be the one to help you because of the relationship issue- how can he help if you doubt his credibility and can't get along? When he says another therapist who is good with addiction, he means not more of the one's like you've had in the past who either did you a disservice or were themselves unethical/incompetent.

He is saying he thinks your drug problem and mental health issues are serious, that he believes you need help for both, but that because of the failure of you two to get along, he will be unable to help you- therefor you should find someone who is qualified who you also get along with.


Again, I think you and/or the therapist will be doing you a disservice to do this... It is honestly like finding a doctor that will treat your migraine without concern of what may be causing it or making it worse.


Best of luck, I meant no disrespect despite my honesty.

Ok, I'm not good at the multi-quote stuff, so let me be as honest and clear as possible:

First off, I need no diagnosis. I know what they are and have for years. They are generally: Generalized Anxiety Disorder, OCD, Depression, some social anxiety, Non Verbal Learning Disability, substance use.

When I said "it's not about any of that" I mean physically detoxing, and while I can get with you on the very strict technicalities of it, truth is, that's nit-picking IMO if we are going to consider things which take less than a weak to withdraw from as "detoxing" and the guy knew about no substance use other than dexadrine and alcohol and I had told him I had already quit the dexadrine, which I had in fact already done.

You're saying that my "defensiveness" proves I am wrong about what I am saying is pretty much the problem here with what a lot of you are saying: it's like, if you admit you have a problem you have a problem (with anything, not just drugs) and if you don't admit you have a problem then you are in denial, so you you still have a problem LOL.

How can anyone win with that kind of logic??

And I never denied having all these problems, I was honest with him about all of them to a T and he refused to help me.

So I am not in denial that I feel that what this man did was not proper protocal, and again, my mother who is a psychoanalyst actually agrees with me that he seemed incompetent, and she's been in the mental health field for over 30 years.

Also, where did you get the idea that "I had grown hostile" towards him?

Is that because I may seem a bit "hostile" now?

If so, I apologize, as I am kind of pissed at this guy, but I was NEVER hostile towards him in the least.

I'd even apologize to him at various times asking him if anything I'd said had been "rude" and he'd laugh and shake his head go "No no!!" like saying "come on you know you haven't said anything wrong!"

So he didn't feel that way.

The only thing I ever got annoyed with him about was at the VERY end when he said "and you won't say you will quit all drugs forever" and I said "well I don't feel I can honestly say "FOREVER" right now but I'll say I will go as long as I can, so why do I have to say "forever"??

And he was like "well, you have to try" or something...

And I said "I AM willing to, I'm just not going to say that word "FOREVER", but what I'll do is take it one day at a time and try to go as long as I can."

He didn't want to hear that, then said "and you can't do it on your own" and I was telling him I LIKED HIM and he seemed like a decent guy (I don't like him anymore) and was pretty confused he wouldn't try to help me. Once again, he said "I wouldn't know where to start" because of all my issues.

And again, there was never any point where I told him "I doubted his credibility" and there was no point at which we really did not get along. We didn't know eachother well enough to know if we got along. I was thinking maybe we'd be ok. Then when he was telling me he couldn't treat me his words were "I usually only work with someone who has one major issue" and my mother agreed with me that that is NOT normal and she is usually able to help people with MULTIPLE major issues at one time.

These are all things you are reading into that didn't happen but are only now things I am saying AFTER the fact, these ideas that I was hostile towards him or that I told him I doubted his credibility.

I only saw the man FOUR times afterall....45 mins each....not much...

As far as this comment you made here:

"When he says another therapist who is good with addiction, he means not more of the one's like you've had in the past who either did you a disservice or were themselves unethical/incompetent."

Sorry but this is NOT true and you are reading into the situation. He NEVER knew much of anything about my past therapists who were FAR better than him. Why are you assuming he knew much of anything about them?

I barely mentioned past therapists. I told him I'd had a very good one for 12 years and wanted to see him again (I'd emailed him).

During the last visit I said "I want to see my old therapist" and he said "well why don't you?" and I said "because he told me has too many patients and not enough free time.

So he DID NOT tell me my old therapist was incompetent or did me a disservice.

He really meant "not me, as I just can't handle someone with all your problems right now", not really in comparison to anyone else, just not those who couldn't help with addictions.

And once again, I'm sorry but I do NOT agree that you can't have a therapist help you with your life and tell you that they think you should not use drugs but still see you, nor do I think it is unethical.

I had an AMAZING therapist for 12 years who this guy could only DREAM to be as good as, and while he DID recommend I go to N.A., and I did for a while, I started seeing him NOT because of drug issues but because of many issues I continue to have.

He helped me A LOT with them, even while I used certain drugs at times, but he did not refuse to stop seeing me because I would smoke weed and drink, which back then, were pretty much the only drugs I used.

I have no idea if he'd have stopped seeing me if I used Kratom...he knew I found Dexadrine at times and was against my using it.

I believe you have an idea that therapy is all about helping people with drug use even when that is not necessarily the case.


I am not saying I will "admit to no wrong" or "see anyone else's perspective", but I don't agree with most of the perspectives I've been given today.


I WAS in agreement before the current posts I was given today as almost everyone in the thread agreed with me that this guy was an idiot, and then you and Nuttynutskin started taking his side, and i just don't agree with you.


I can't see anything "wrong" I've done, other than yes, it's hard to help someone if they are using lots of drugs, but I'm trying NOT to do that now!

I have stopped Dexadrine and Kratom, though I don't know how long I can go, and while I've still been drinking too much I know I shouldn't be and am trying to stop for a while.

I don't want to stop ALL drugs FOREVER, but I want to go without most for as long as possible, and I'm willing to go to NA or do a 12-step too.

So why is that not good enough to be doing that AND seeing a therapist at the same time??


I am sorry, but i fail to see how it isn't, and the past therapist I had who was an amazing man was not being unethical by treating my issues regardless of any minor drug problems. Of course, back then I had fewer drug problems, but had he suddenly decided to drop me after years of therapy when more of them had arisen IMO THAT would have been a terrible thing to have done. You don't turn your back on someone like that, and I see THAT as unethical, and he continued to help me as long as he could.


The therapist we are talking about knew less than what I have revealed to you in this thread, and there was no hostility between us, and I expressed no doubt in his ability to help me to his face, until he led me to the door as I felt confused and hurt, which is still how I feel.

 

[Mafioso]

It seems you intend to argue every point, and my last reply was probably guilty of the same thing, but I was trying to confront some of the these things you keep glossing over, blaming on others, and failing to take responsibility for.

The truth is, if you're opinion of the therapist is already this bad, there probably isn't much good that could come of the sessions to begin with, as you'll either reject or be generally closed off to anything he says, as would anyone who doesn't trust in someone's abilities and dislikes them.

I don't know all the specifics, and unfortunately don't have the time to learn all of them about you, but from what you have told me(you are still using drugs and have multiple diagnosed mental disorders that are exacerbated by drug use), I don't think you've truly addressed your drug use, which is why I'd assume you were recommended to someone else who can treat both, as co-occurring disorders tend to feed into each other and addressing one without addressing the other is like patching one hole in a sinking boat that has 2-3+ holes.

You can definitely do self-care, and not everyone needs formal treatment- although I truly believe anyone open enough will be able to find some benefit to competent formal treatment, there are also excellent resource available to the public as well. The thing is, the only thing evidence based about NA or and self-help group for addiction that I"m aware of is the group therapy portion of it, which has clinical trials proving it's benefits. The big book and the 12 steps, despite being around for around 100 years has no scientific/clinical evidence of it's effectiveness and although it's extremely difficult to get accurate statistics of success rates with nay recovery, it's been reported around 5-10% or less by some sources. Sorting through all this info and misinfo while dealing with the disorder is difficult, to say the least.


Ultimately you'll decide your own treatment, and I could understand why might want to make some of the choices you are talking about.. My main point was that you're ultimately doing yourself a disservice by paying a professional for help but only telling them part of the problem, or potential cause- or that they are doing you a disservice to be aware of a potential problem/cause and not address it. Best of luck, I hope you can stay open minded through all of this.

 

[Mafioso]

I can't see anything "wrong" I've done, other than yes, it's hard to help someone if they are using lots of drugs, but I'm trying NOT to do that now!

I have stopped Dexadrine and Kratom, though I don't know how long I can go, and while I've still been drinking too much I know I shouldn't be and am trying to stop for a while.

I don't want to stop ALL drugs FOREVER, but I want to go without most for as long as possible, and I'm willing to go to NA or do a 12-step too.

So why is that not good enough to be doing that AND seeing a therapist at the same time??

You've answered your own question, but if it isn't clear to you yet and you are truly willing to go to any 12 step, you'll see that majority except those who are still using will agree that the drug use needs stop(at least for an extended period of time- though most at 12 step will say forever).

And I didn't mean to bag on 12 step in my last post, my original point was that these things are generally meant as aftercare if you are wanting professional help. Nothing wrong with doing self-help groups, but I you might be upset with their views on your drug use as well,

 

[Mycophile]

It seems you intend to argue every point, and my last reply was probably guilty of the same thing, but I was trying to confront some of the these things you keep glossing over, blaming on others, and failing to take responsibility for.

The truth is, if you're opinion of the therapist is already this bad, there probably isn't much good that could come of the sessions to begin with, as you'll either reject or be generally closed off to anything he says, as would anyone who doesn't trust in someone's abilities and dislikes them.

I don't know all the specifics, and unfortunately don't have the time to learn all of them about you, but from what you have told me(you are still using drugs and have multiple diagnosed mental disorders that are exacerbated by drug use), I don't think you've truly addressed your drug use, which is why I'd assume you were recommended to someone else who can treat both, as co-occurring disorders tend to feed into each other and addressing one without addressing the other is like patching one hole in a sinking boat that has 2-3+ holes.

You can definitely do self-care, and not everyone needs formal treatment- although I truly believe anyone open enough will be able to find some benefit to competent formal treatment, there are also excellent resource available to the public as well. The thing is, the only thing evidence based about NA or and self-help group for addiction that I"m aware of is the group therapy portion of it, which has clinical trials proving it's benefits. The big book and the 12 steps, despite being around for around 100 years has no scientific/clinical evidence of it's effectiveness and although it's extremely difficult to get accurate statistics of success rates with nay recovery, it's been reported around 5-10% or less by some sources. Sorting through all this info and misinfo while dealing with the disorder is difficult, to say the least.


Ultimately you'll decide your own treatment, and I could understand why might want to make some of the choices you are talking about.. My main point was that you're ultimately doing yourself a disservice by paying a professional for help but only telling them part of the problem, or potential cause- or that they are doing you a disservice to be aware of a potential problem/cause and not address it. Best of luck, I hope you can stay open minded through all of this.

Ok, I PMd you, but we can address these few points here before we let the thread die as it's easier to do so.

NOW I am closed off to what the guy says, after the sessions are over, so yes, now nothing good could come of it, and I am of the opinion he was a bad therapist, so I'm glad I will no longer see him. AT THE TIME I was relatively open minded about him.

This man was qualified on paper to treat BOTH my co-occuring problems, which is why my mother, who is a Jungian Analyst and social worker or 30 years, specifically found him online, thinking he'd be able to help me.

That is why she agreed with me that it was VERY weird that the guy said "I usually only help people who have one major problem" when on his page online it says "qualified to assist with: Substance abuse, generalized anxiety, social anxiety, men's issues, depression, etc." Basically, every problem I had.

You admitted you are not an expert. Well my mother IS an expert, which is why she found him for me, and she agreed it is ABSURD to say you can treat all that and then say that you usually only handle patients with ONE of those issues at a time, specifically because they are so often co-occuring, and how often her own patients have had multiple of these issues.

I should also mention that when he said "I usually only help people with one major issue" I said "well listen, I'm not THAT bad, I mean, what about people who are worse off than me who have PTSD or who are suicidal?" and he said "Oh no, I don't work with patients with PTSD or who are suicidal."

My mother also saw that as a red-flag, because while it is true some therapists do draw lines with who they work with, she said herself "what therapist worth their salt has NEVER worked with a patient who has EVER had suicidal ideation?"

Put simply, this signified to both of us, that the man was basically overwhelmed by the amount of different problems I had, not only drug issues, and that he usually doesn't work with TRULY troubled people...who I guess I would count as, but not NEARLY so bad as suicidal people or those with PTSD.

And of course I DID tell the therapist about my addictions and other issues, but because he was incompetent, he wouldn't help, and NOW after seeing that it seems that some of these therapists who CLAIM to be able to help with both addictions and other issues might not be worth their salt (maybe it's not fair to judge them all based on just him though), and what you so far have said in this thread, it DOES make me question if perhaps it might not be better for me to have a regular therapist who's not an addiction specialist, and tell him about my addictions but that we are not PRIMARILY working on them, and go to NA as treatment for that, so that this kind of problem does not happen again with a therapist feeling like he has too many issues on his hands with me.

But to tell you the truth, I think he'd have found me too hard to handle even minus my drug problems had I not had them, and I believe we'd eventually not have been a good fit for eachother in the end and I'd have probably sought help elsewhere. I'm certainly glad he openly admitted to not being able to handle me, because it means I don't have to waste more time on him.

 

[Mafioso]

Yes, I see you sent me a number of long PMs.... please stop. The messages are accusatory and aggressive, I'm not looking to start a fight here.

I'm not trying to argue or accuse you of anything, if I said anything that was untrue or inaccurate, then I apologize. As stated by myself, I do not have the time to read every word- and as you have stated, you haven't even given all the info. I have obviously upset you, and for that, I am sorry and would like to make it clear I don't have any hostile feelings towards you.

I gave my opinion as you have asked for in this thread. If you are looking for someone to fight, it isn't going to be me. Best of luck with your situation

 

[Mycophile]

Yes, I see you sent me a number of long PMs.... please stop. The messages are accusatory and aggressive, I'm not looking to start a fight here.

I'm not trying to argue or accuse you of anything, if I said anything that was untrue or inaccurate, then I apologize. As stated by myself, I do not have the time to read every word- and as you have stated, you haven't even given all the info. I have obviously upset you, and for that, I am sorry and would like to make it clear I don't have any hostile feelings towards you.

I gave my opinion as you have asked for in this thread. If you are looking for someone to fight, it isn't going to be me. Best of luck with your situation

I have no desire to fight either and I really dislike arguments.

I'm sorry for the anger on my part as I know you didn't mean to make me mad, but I think I've already said why I felt that way.

The last PM I sent you is still something I'd like you to consider.

Anyways, you have always seemed like a good guy and I have nothing against you.

I guess as a mod you felt compelled to reply.

If you wouldn't mind, please close this thread.

Thank you.