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Harm Reduction Meth/Xanax use on and off for months.

Gulspor

Greenlighter
Joined
Oct 13, 2020
Messages
10
Location
Low Desert
I mean of course I do find myself taking more and more of each substance to balance each other out but I’ve never felt more functional while doing so. Protein shakes every morning, daily tasks done in a timely manner, having no social anxiety while talking w anyone, budgeting fairly well for the first time ever, etc... and to be fair, we are in a pandemic so I haven’t had to work a single day since June.
New year is going to be coming very quickly, along with the stresses of moving into an environment where none of what I’m doing is even a possibility. Any tips on how to stay functional while weening myself off and/or quitting altogether?
 

DeathRow

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 13, 2020
Messages
39
Location
Chicago
Benzos were a huge addiction for me too, like to the point doctors were shocked I was even alive when I told them how many I took daily. For me, withdrawal was terrible, almost deadly actually. Meth for me was also an addiction but had always been a side drug that was never the focus of my preferences (heroin and benzos). Meth wasn’t hard at all for me to abstain from.

Although my benzo experience seems to clearly exceed yours if you’re only using them on and off for some months, so it doesn’t seem like they can compare, even mild benzo withdrawal can be pretty damn uncomfortable. Gabapentin is a good way to relieve some of the symptoms. As far as meth goes, it’s mostly mental, which is either a good thing or a bad thing depending on your thinking process. It’s nice to not have many physical symptoms but the mental struggle is half the battle, and if you felt like you needed meth to be happy, you may find that abstaining is exceedingly difficult due to PAWS.

Like I said, gabapentin works wonders for me, but learn how to properly use it first with staggering. Try to avoid other psychoactive drugs as coping mechanisms as they’ll just prolong the issue and the root will never be solved.

Hope this helps a bit.
 

Gulspor

Greenlighter
Joined
Oct 13, 2020
Messages
10
Location
Low Desert
Thank you for the advice. I know my mother has gabapentin on hand quite frequently and wouldn’t mind if I asked for some.
I suppose the real question is what is the root of the problem and how do I get to it. Which has been discussed with loved ones before and yet I’m still here 😪
 

DeathRow

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 13, 2020
Messages
39
Location
Chicago
Thank you for the advice. I know my mother has gabapentin on hand quite frequently and wouldn’t mind if I asked for some.
I suppose the real question is what is the root of the problem and how do I get to it. Which has been discussed with loved ones before and yet I’m still here 😪
See that’s the thing about addiction, is there’s always a route, and after we get sober we’re forced to try to find and deal with it, or we’re cursed to live unhappily forever. I was “lucky” enough that my root was an obvious case of schizophrenia.

Good luck trying to stay sober. Attend meetings if you need support or are having a difficult day. NA really works. Hope you find your root.
 

Gulspor

Greenlighter
Joined
Oct 13, 2020
Messages
10
Location
Low Desert
See that’s the thing about addiction, is there’s always a route, and after we get sober we’re forced to try to find and deal with it, or we’re cursed to live unhappily forever. I was “lucky” enough that my root was an obvious case of schizophrenia.

Good luck trying to stay sober. Attend meetings if you need support or are having a difficult day. NA really works. Hope you find your root.
Crazy that you mention schizophrenia, as my mom has schizoaffective disorder, which either was passed down to me in one way or another, as it’s schizophrenia with major depression and bipolar. Or I simply induced those myself with drugs. So the likelihood of me having at least depression and bipolar are pretty high but I wouldn’t go as far to say schizophrenia just yet. I sure wish healthcare was more accessible 🤕
But thank you, again. I hope you’re doing well too, Deathrow.
 

thelung

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 24, 2004
Messages
2,232
Location
Seattle
I've been dealing with benzo addiction for a while now. Pressed pills are prevelent in my area, and some of them are way too potent. I've seen lots of folks die from the benzo/opiate combo.
 

DeathRow

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 13, 2020
Messages
39
Location
Chicago
Crazy that you mention schizophrenia, as my mom has schizoaffective disorder, which either was passed down to me in one way or another, as it’s schizophrenia with major depression and bipolar. Or I simply induced those myself with drugs. So the likelihood of me having at least depression and bipolar are pretty high but I wouldn’t go as far to say schizophrenia just yet. I sure wish healthcare was more accessible 🤕
But thank you, again. I hope you’re doing well too, Deathrow.
Depending on how old you are, I’d say you might be safe on the schizophrenic part, but I of course can’t say that with certainty. Typically schizophrenia starts showing up in your mid twenties, and if you’re over say, 26 or so and you haven’t been diagnosed, you’re safe for the time being, as somebody would’ve definitely noticed you’re exhibiting symptoms by now, severe schizophrenia like mine are pretty easy to spot especially for people who can see the changes in your behavior. Although it still could show up at some point, or could just be at a minor severity at this point.

I've been dealing with benzo addiction for a while now. Pressed pills are prevelent in my area, and some of them are way too potent. I've seen lots of folks die from the benzo/opiate combo.

Oh for sure, opiates and benzos are a LETHAL combo. Do NOT do it. It will kill you very easily. I am lucky I somehow survived, as my doses of both heroin and benzos were beyond belief. Although equally worth mentioning is that sudden abstinence from a moderate-heavy benzo dependence can be just as deadly, as it causes seizures which can kill you. I had a massive seizure from w/d and was rushed to the hospital where the doc said I was lucky to be alive at all and put me on seizure watch for awhile while they tapered me.
 

4meSM

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 6, 2014
Messages
2,072
Location
The Brainstem
You're going to have to taper the xanax so be prepared for that. If you want to quit I recommend changing to diazepam or clonazepam and tapering that.
For meth, expect some slight depression at least and possibly anhedonia if you have been doing a lot, but mostly fairly strong cravings (some people get them worse than others).

From personal experience, I think changing your environment is extremely useful. You're going to have a much easier time staying off meth. Just make sure to take advantage of your new life situation and start meeting new people and engaging in rewarding (non drug related) activities, maybe get a new hobby.
 
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