Mental Health Mental Health Update (bad trips)

[kirbo]

Hi,

I posted on here in November last year regarding some bad trips I had and I just wanted to make an update post. Since I last spoke on here I said that I would try and sort things out with delusions and whatnot by myself, although, things have not gone so swimmingly. I realised after awhile my bad experiences had properly messed up my brain in a way even therapy couldn't help. After seeing a therapist for a bit she recommended I see a gp to get a diagnosis/medication. My parents are still oblivious to how I am feeling and just assume I am depressed. Since I last posted I have been isolating myself due to fears of what might happen if I go out (things tied to my delusions). One of the bad things about this is that I refuse to go out with my parents for things like dinners, gym, or movies and they assume I hate them because of it but thats not the case. When I say I avoid going out with them, I really mean it, for example, the last time they wanted me to go eat we argued for about 40 mins although I was basically just being yelled at. My dad went off on me, swearing at me and saying things like "why cant you just be normal" or "get the fuck out of your room and be like a regular person". These are just 2 examples I can remember but it went on and it got to the point where I was so pissed that I punched my closet door 3 times and broke my knuckle. This is just an example of how much I sometimes don't want to go out. Moreover, I do think less about my delusions yet they are still debilitating at times. I told my mom that I should see a gp and I think she just ignored it and it sucks because I am 17 and cant go alone. I have basically not been going outside for months and instead playing video games. I guess me being rather paranoid led me to post again on here to ask about a few things. Although I had heard a few stories of people experiencing time loops on acid and other substances, I was wondering if anyone else has experienced something like that. Another question I have is, has anyone had drugs for delusional disorders and if so do they actually make a difference and did you manage to be happy again? I am very scared for my mental health as it still remains withered and am very confused on time loops even make sense like how the fuck did it happen twice to me and one time only with a zoot. My life at the moment has a very hellish hue, and I need some advice.

Thank you for reading this,
Jer %)

 

[nuttynutskin]

I think you need to tell your parents you have mental problems that aren't going away and that you think you need to work with a psychiatrist. Then again, it doesn't sound like they're being very supportive. Can you try to convince them? If you can't convince them maybe check around to see if there's any resources for people that are in your position that are underage. Maybe a school counselor?

 

[kirbo]

I think you need to tell your parents you have mental problems that aren't going away and that you think you need to work with a psychiatrist. Then again, it doesn't sound like they're being very supportive. Can you try to convince them? If you can't convince them maybe check around to see if there's any resources for people that are in your position that are underage. Maybe a school counselor?

Thanks for the reply. I can’t really tell my parents about the problem because it’s drug related and they won’t support me at all. I’m about to go to uni soon so I’ll try and use their psychiatrist. I think I’ll just have to wait till I can get help without them knowing. Because whenever they ask why my therapist wanted me to see a GP I just have to say “idk depression or something”.

 

[RV Mystery Journey]

Tough stuff.

Have you taken any measures to integrate the difficult experiences?

I think the actual term is integration. Integrating the bad trip to make sense of it completely?

I can't tell you what is going on.

Buddy at least you aren't a junkie worrying your parents about OD'ing and crushing their accounts with rehabs that don't work fees?

 

[kirbo]

Tough stuff.

Have you taken any measures to integrate the difficult experiences?

I think the actual term is integration. Integrating the bad trip to make sense of it completely?

I can't tell you what is going on.

Buddy at least you aren't a junkie worrying your parents about OD'ing and crushing their accounts with rehabs that don't work fees?

Thanks for the response,

I have been thinking about the bad trips for about a year now and I still cant make sense of it. I would love for some kind of explanation behind time loops on psychedelics because I cant wrap my head around it. I understand that my perception could have been so warped that I felt like I was going in an infinite loop but it just seemed way to realistic to the point where I swear I walked the same path hundreds of times and my friend was saying the same shit over and over again. I dunno its just really messed with me.

 

[nuttynutskin]

I would love for some kind of explanation behind time loops on psychedelics because I cant wrap my head around it. I understand that my perception could have been so warped that I felt like I was going in an infinite loop but it just seemed way to realistic to the point where I swear I walked the same path hundreds of times and my friend was saying the same shit over and over again. I dunno its just really messed with me.

I had the same thing NOT on psychedelics but withdrawaling from clonazepam and alcohol in a hospital waiting room. To this day I don't know wtf that was about other than my brain going haywire.

 

[kirbo]

I had the same thing NOT on psychedelics but withdrawaling from clonazepam and alcohol in a hospital waiting room. To this day I don't know wtf that was about other than my brain going haywire.

Thanks for the response,
I was wondering if you could tell me what you experienced. I understand if you don’t want to talk about it though.

 

[RV Mystery Journey]

It is ok. Sometimes drugs cause nonsensical and scary delusions.

I wouldn't recommend using them again.

Bad trips for me usually happen when I am doing something wrong. It is my shit karma making it bad lol. Always.

Good karma can be acquired and really karma dictates a good or bad trip IMO.

P.S.

I am not expecting you to believe what I do and I know I am being biased.

Karma aside if you do approach a psychedelic again pay close attention to set and setting. And I would wait a couple years if you have to but I am not your parents.