curiositykitty
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Aug 14, 2018
- Messages
- 10
I have been a blue light member for just over 1 year now. I have learned a lot of valuable information on this site. I would like to express my appreciation for all of the valuable info I have found with blue light. I just made my first post, and thought "It's probably a good idea to make an introduction post, too." In keeping true to my nature, I had to go about it completely backward, lol. Post a question first, then introduce myself.
I guess I could give a little of my history for ya'll..... I feel like my relationship with drugs started young, not illegal drugs, but prescribed ones started my journey. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 10. Back then, they barely acknowledged ADHD as something REAL, let alone have any solid alternative treatments for it. So I was prescribed Ritalin. It was AMAZING! I was in the 5th grade and was still supposed to have recess every day. However, I had not enjoyed a minute of recess since the first day that year. I was failing all academic subjects and had months and months of work backed up. I spent my recess time, while all the other kids got to play, in a classroom alone fighting with myself to catch up my schoolwork. The first day I took the Ritalin I ACTUALLY completed 5 overdue math assignments and a few other things in one 15-minute recess period. The second day, I got to go OUTSIDE and PLAY for the first time since that very first day. Ritalin was a miracle, in a teeny little pill. Fast forward a few years, and the side effects were VERY noticeable. My friends would tell me I was more fun to be around, and that they generally liked me better when I would forget to take my pill. I started noticing the "high" I got from not taking it, and the zombie-like effect it was beginning to have on me. Fast forward to my adult years, I was lost. Nobody had ever taught me any sort of healthy coping mechanisms. I legally became an adult and Dr's no longer wanted to prescribe the medication to me. Any time I brought up the subject I would get treated like, and vibes suggesting they thought of me as a "pill seeker" rather than an adult who needed the medication they had given me for years, in order to function well in society i.e.; keep a fairly tidy home, get a college degree, keep a job. My relationships suffered, everything suffered. Then I found meth. I've self-medicated with it off and on for years now. I feel like it is downright unfair that I should have to rely on somthing so illegal, and possibly dangerous in order to cope and be a functioning member of society.
Anyways, that's my story in short form LOL Thank you for having me, and finally, I can say "Nice to meet ya'll!"
I guess I could give a little of my history for ya'll..... I feel like my relationship with drugs started young, not illegal drugs, but prescribed ones started my journey. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 10. Back then, they barely acknowledged ADHD as something REAL, let alone have any solid alternative treatments for it. So I was prescribed Ritalin. It was AMAZING! I was in the 5th grade and was still supposed to have recess every day. However, I had not enjoyed a minute of recess since the first day that year. I was failing all academic subjects and had months and months of work backed up. I spent my recess time, while all the other kids got to play, in a classroom alone fighting with myself to catch up my schoolwork. The first day I took the Ritalin I ACTUALLY completed 5 overdue math assignments and a few other things in one 15-minute recess period. The second day, I got to go OUTSIDE and PLAY for the first time since that very first day. Ritalin was a miracle, in a teeny little pill. Fast forward a few years, and the side effects were VERY noticeable. My friends would tell me I was more fun to be around, and that they generally liked me better when I would forget to take my pill. I started noticing the "high" I got from not taking it, and the zombie-like effect it was beginning to have on me. Fast forward to my adult years, I was lost. Nobody had ever taught me any sort of healthy coping mechanisms. I legally became an adult and Dr's no longer wanted to prescribe the medication to me. Any time I brought up the subject I would get treated like, and vibes suggesting they thought of me as a "pill seeker" rather than an adult who needed the medication they had given me for years, in order to function well in society i.e.; keep a fairly tidy home, get a college degree, keep a job. My relationships suffered, everything suffered. Then I found meth. I've self-medicated with it off and on for years now. I feel like it is downright unfair that I should have to rely on somthing so illegal, and possibly dangerous in order to cope and be a functioning member of society.
Anyways, that's my story in short form LOL Thank you for having me, and finally, I can say "Nice to meet ya'll!"
