• MDMA &
    Empathogenic
    Drugs

    Welcome Guest!
  • MDMA Moderators:

MDMA Recovery (Stories & Support - 7) [ALL LTC posts go here]

ZeroLuck said:
Today I've took 40mg propranolol, 2 times through the day and... wow this destroyed my anxiety. It's not like I stop being worried, but... makes me not care about LTC or my past at all. It's very cheap medicine, and no bad side effects, maybe the worst I've read is reversible hair loss.

My memory is a little better.
Click to expand...
Propanol lowers blood pressure. Be careful, one too many and you may find yourself with one (a blood pressure). Try and check your BP before taking.
 
Hey mate, Im very glad to hear that you feel you have some control and influence over how you feel, and are able to make conscious decisions and take steps to improve things.

Yes indeed a clean diet will always pay off. Due to my long term illness and severe allergies, my diet has been 100% homecooked, zero processed, whole, unrefined foods.

It pays off massively. Eating the standard refined artificial processed diet rapidly ages the body and the mind. Throughout my illness I have always looked a good 10 years younger than I am. Most people who are 5 or 10 years younger than me look 5 or 10 years older than me.

It has nothing to do with vanity but has always been an undeniable demonstration of the link between Diet and the rate at which our bodies age.

My own diet is brutally restricted however and I can't tolerate any supplements barely, virtually all herbs and natural healing remedies are intolerable and there are only two types of herbal tea I have come across which I can actually drink without an adverse reaction. Nettle and chamomile tea and I do not like either of them apart from that is plain filtered water is the only liquid which enters my body however much I crave a nice cup of tea, coffee, cocoa or some other herbal tea.

The severity of the adverse reactions just is not worth even thinking about taking any sort of miniature detour from my straight-line tight-rope I must stay on in order to be able simply to endure living comfortably, the respiratory reactions are so severe.

It has taken the most remarkable discipline to stay motivated throughout this time and continue to suffice on what has become a monotonous and grindingly boring and unenjoyable way of living.

It didn't always used to be like this but the last few years have been unbearably hard due to injuries and illness and the toll of long-term lyme disease and all of it's damages.
But no question it has paid off and continues to immeasurably to maintain this natural home-cooked unrefined eating way of living.

@ZeroLuck make sure you are getting enough healthy natural fats in your diet we need to eat a lot more fat than we are misinformed about.

However please be aware that man-made refined fat basically all refined vegetable oils and margarine is an incredibly toxic poisonous substance to put into our bodies and has absolutely no health benefits quite the opposite is extremely damaging to health and wellbeing and is directly linked to cancer development.

People have been brainwashed by the food Industries and government into using this man-made patented poisonous artificial product with the strong belief that the natural saturated fats are very bad for them.

When it is entirely the other way round. If you can and this advice goes to everybody avoid those man-made fats like the plague.

We require a fairly large amounts of natural fats in an equal ratio of saturated to unsaturated optimally and our bodies need this to flourish however this fat is like a key for our perfect locks and the man-made fat is like a hammer busting down the door.

I mean isn't it glaringly obvious that we should not be eating man-made unnatural fat when our bodies are made to require and be nourished by natural fat?

Absolute insanity by definition which is the name of the game for mankind these days.
So I recommend making sure you have an adequately high intake of these natural fats like 40 to 50 of organic virgin coconut oil a day I would suggest as a daily. regimen.

I have been consuming 40 to 60 g of organic coconut oil daily for well over 10 years.
The mainstream media and medical establishment would have me believe that this would Sabotage my heart health and pump my cholesterol through the roof.

When actually I have a phenomenally healthy heart to this day and my cholesterol was tested to be way better than average in both directions like better than optimal practically.

Also of great importance is getting enough quality natural unrefined salt and this is probably actually arguably one of the greatest deficiencies on earth because the vast majority of people again are consuming man-made toxic poisonous artificial salt, without the slightest clue that this practice is mental and health damaging.

Man-made salt is not quite as bad as man-made fat but is still one of the most toxic and damaging foods consumed worldwide and it is virtually entirely responsible for the bad name that salt has and it's negative health effects.

It is specifically the refined form of the salt which has been unnaturally processed and stripped and destroyed of all goodness, and turned into an alien artificial product which our bodies can not only utilise but has very negative consequences.

So fortunately because my diet has been 100% unprocessed home-cooked there is no added salt in any of my food and I avoid it vehemently but I add my own natural unrefined salt to my meals each day- currently we use Redmond real salt and this one I recommend above all others but if you can get a very good quality Himalayan salt this is also just as good but the Himalayan salt quality is more variable depending on where and how it is mined from but will always be infinitely better than refined salt no matter what.

And we need a much much greater amount of salt then we are told and and a deficiency of natural salt is directly related to depression and anxiety and many other conditions and symptoms and often goes a whole lifetime without being corrected or even understood due to the misinformation of the media and the bastards behind the script.

So everyday I weigh 10 grams of Redmond real salt and I add this to my meals and I consider this to be pretty much a minimum requirement, and in no way excessive at all as long as sufficient clean water is taken each day of course.

For quite a few years I bought into the no more than 6 grams ridiculous recommendation which is a huge under dose and I was under salting my body without realising.

Again I have maintained this supposedly very high salt intake for many years now without any adverse effects on my heart or cardiovascular system, perfect blood pressure as well.

As well as my high coconut oil intake I also as as much extra virgin olive oil to my meals each day plus there is fat in meat, fish, nuts etc.

My diet is very high in natural fat and natural salt yet not only do I not demonstrate any of the symptoms which the medical establishment would warn me about but actually it is completely the opposite case.

www.westonaprice.org

Salt and our Health

By Morton Satin
www.westonaprice.org www.westonaprice.org

Here is a link with very strong evidence in relation to how much salt we really need and the proof that we need a much greater amount which is not associated with health problems but actually the opposite, with a correlation between lower recommended salt levels and many complications.


So consider this if what I'm saying is correct and we require a much larger amounts of unrefined salt in our diet and our bodies and brains need this as much as any other nutrients or food source.... then you could consider this to be a huge deficiency because a lot of people do not consume ANY natural unrefined salt at all or have any clue what it is vs they're refined versions.

And salt deficiency is very strongly related to depression and anxiety.
The same goes for the natural fats especially Omega-3 fatty acids which if there is a deficiency of will directly contribute depression and mental health problems.

Does this scenario apply to anybody here struggling with LTC?

So that would be my very strong advice to every and any human being on this planet to make some dietary improvements the best and first place to start would be to aim to eradicate man-made artificial salt and fat from the diet and replace them with ample quantities of the unrefined natural healing versions which are made by Nature to nourish and Heal our bodies and brains.


Ok my thoughts have run dry for a moment. I hope at least somebody can relate to what I'm saying and my benefits from it.

@ZeroLuck wishing you all the best mate I hope you gradually and continually find ways to feel better and more optimistic about life and the future.
 
Last edited:
Hi ya,guys!
I hope you are well.
Little update from me.
1 year and 6 months of my LTC.
I feel almost 100% recovered.
Now I’m in progress of stopping the SSRI.

I wish you all the best,mates!
It will end for everyone.
 
shouldvestayedhome said:
I used to have a strong libido however, I noticed my erections haven't been as strong since the incident .
Click to expand...

I'm asking if your libido is affected as well, because if you have strong libido, but ED, then there's clearly something wrong, while if you have no libido it's normal to lack a good erection. People have such issues with PTSD and anxiety, so wouldn't think it's physiological.

Edit with me, I'm feeling fantastic, my memory is still good, experimenting with caffeine and sugar and still keep the results. It's silly how diet lifted me so fast, only 1 month ago I was at one of my lowest points.
 
ZeroLuck said:
I believe it's pshychoclogical, I never had issues. Do you have strong libido? Of the answer is no, then I don't think you should worry.
Click to expand...

No it’s not libido. My morning and nocturnal elections are either weak or non existent
 
Hi all,

I've been reading online for about a month now and though I'd ask for some advice and just get some of it out of my system.

I attended a festival this year about a month ago, May 17-19, and not knowing better I rolled all three days. (I've rolled before on these and they are from a trusted source, everyone in our group also rolled all three days, they had nothing wrong after).

In total I ingested orally about 4.5 - 5 pills. I cant remember if it was five because I think I threw a half away.

The first day I took a whole pill (250mg) and had a crazy roll, I re-dosed with another half. The second day I believe I only took one (250mg) (hence I believe I might've thrown away the other half by accident).

The last day I took two whole pills (very stupid I know) and I did not feel ANYTHING. I just felt irritated and angry.

The Monday I got home, nothing wrong. Tuesday comes and I get hit with something I dont want to ever experience again. Extreme DP/DR and depression, along with brain fog, extreme head tension and anxiety. I had a panic attack and went to the ER. They said everything was fine and gave me anxiety medication to sleep that night.

That first week was mainly depression with the DP/DR. That sort of faded first. The second week I just felt light-headed and had some ringing in my ears. The third week I had none of the previously descried symptoms, but I had slight head tension still, and my head would sometimes get very warm, almost like a fever. I would also wake up randomly in the night, but I would usually go back to sleep.

This has now been 4 weeks and I can say I feel like I am at 95%. I still have some slight head tension. Sometimes I'll feel out of it for a few minutes to half an hour. And just slight anxiety. What worries me is the head tension. I'm afraid I've severely damaged myself. I'm also worried about problems arising down the road. My focus is good, my memory is the same as before (I always forget if I lock the door when I leave lol) and I've been doing cardio basically everyday. I try not to focus on the tension and waking up at night, but these two symptoms are keeping me from believing Ill be okay. I did talk to my doctor over the phone, and he said to give it more time, I just want to see what anyone on here has to say about the tension. It seems to be in the back of my head right above my neck area, and sometimes but very rarely I feel it around my forehead.

Thoughts? I'm staying hopeful for a speedy recovery, this has definitely caused me to change my life around in a positive way (more exercise, healthier diet, more organized and focused on my goals).

I appreciate any feedback. Much Love.
 
rinzzlerr said:
Hi all,

I've been reading online for about a month now and though I'd ask for some advice and just get some of it out of my system.

I attended a festival this year about a month ago, May 17-19, and not knowing better I rolled all three days. (I've rolled before on these and they are from a trusted source, everyone in our group also rolled all three days, they had nothing wrong after).

In total I ingested orally about 4.5 - 5 pills. I cant remember if it was five because I think I threw a half away.

The first day I took a whole pill (250mg) and had a crazy roll, I re-dosed with another half. The second day I believe I only took one (250mg) (hence I believe I might've thrown away the other half by accident).

The last day I took two whole pills (very stupid I know) and I did not feel ANYTHING. I just felt irritated and angry.

The Monday I got home, nothing wrong. Tuesday comes and I get hit with something I dont want to ever experience again. Extreme DP/DR and depression, along with brain fog, extreme head tension and anxiety. I had a panic attack and went to the ER. They said everything was fine and gave me anxiety medication to sleep that night.

That first week was mainly depression with the DP/DR. That sort of faded first. The second week I just felt light-headed and had some ringing in my ears. The third week I had none of the previously descried symptoms, but I had slight head tension still, and my head would sometimes get very warm, almost like a fever. I would also wake up randomly in the night, but I would usually go back to sleep.

This has now been 4 weeks and I can say I feel like I am at 95%. I still have some slight head tension. Sometimes I'll feel out of it for a few minutes to half an hour. And just slight anxiety. What worries me is the head tension. I'm afraid I've severely damaged myself. I'm also worried about problems arising down the road. My focus is good, my memory is the same as before (I always forget if I lock the door when I leave lol) and I've been doing cardio basically everyday. I try not to focus on the tension and waking up at night, but these two symptoms are keeping me from believing Ill be okay. I did talk to my doctor over the phone, and he said to give it more time, I just want to see what anyone on here has to say about the tension. It seems to be in the back of my head right above my neck area, and sometimes but very rarely I feel it around my forehead.

Thoughts? I'm staying hopeful for a speedy recovery, this has definitely caused me to change my life around in a positive way (more exercise, healthier diet, more organized and focused on my goals).

I appreciate any feedback. Much Love.
Click to expand...
he will go through health, meditate, you will not hurt anything
 
Hey all, currently on month 4.5 of LTC.
I've been experiencing a myriad of symptoms which have impacted my life severely to the point where I'm questioning my existence. Being 19, the future just seems so bleak. I'm smart, attend a go8 uni and had a bright future ahead of me but things have taken a turn for the worst.-
Here are my symptoms:
Depression- Most prominently emotional numbness/blank and apathy, my mood is mostly flat and dull, things that sparked emotion prior to LTC don't affect me at all now. I also lost all interest in my hobbies and things that sparked joy in my life. It's as if the dopamine reward circuit in my brain shut off. Just going through the motions nowadays. Everything feels/is 'meh' at most. No motivation to do anything except sleep. Was obsessed with bodybuilding and fitness before, but nowadays finding the motivation to hit the gym is very difficult. IT feels as though my former self and personality has been completely stripped away from me. Just empty.
Anxiety- Cannot get restful sleep as my mind is constantly racing with thoughts. Wake up feeling like shit, that dread 'ughhh' feeling when thinking about the day ahead. Random bouts of feelings of impending doom during the first month. Random bouts of anxiety occurs that never used to happen, at work I'm constantly on edge, never relaxed and always questioning myself in my mind.
First 2 months I was living in a haze, brain was severely clouded and everything felt fake, as if I was watching myself from a third person perspective.
Cognitive abilities- Short term memory noticeably affected, sometimes struggle to find the right word (this has improved).
Before LTC, I used to do whatever and didn't give a shit, acting goofy, making jokes and always having an opnion in my social circle but now I have nothing on my mind.
I just want the drive and energy for life back. Im so so tired.
I know for a fact that'll recover, Its just so demoralising that the fact its taking so long.
Ill be off these forums as excessively ruminating on this will do no good and only hinder the recovery process.
Will update when I recover.
Stay positive and keep fighting <3
 
Last edited:
iwanttobenormal said:
Hey all, currently on month 4.5 of LTC.
I've been experiencing a myriad of symptoms which have impacted my life severely to the point where I'm questioning my existence. Being 19, the future just seems so bleak. I'm smart, attend a go8 uni and had a bright future ahead of me but things have taken a turn for the worst.-
Here are my symptoms:
Depression- Most prominently emotional numbness/blank and apathy, my mood is mostly flat and dull, things that sparked emotion prior to LTC don't affect me at all now. I also lost all interest in my hobbies and things that sparked joy in my life. It's as if the dopamine reward circuit in my brain shut off. Just going through the motions nowadays. Everything feels/is 'meh' at most. No motivation to do anything except sleep. Was obsessed with bodybuilding and fitness before, but nowadays finding the motivation to hit the gym is very difficult. IT feels as though my former self and personality has been completely stripped away from me. Just empty.
Anxiety- Cannot get restful sleep as my mind is constantly racing with thoughts. Wake up feeling like shit, that dread 'ughhh' feeling when thinking about the day ahead. Random bouts of feelings of impending doom during the first month. Random bouts of anxiety occurs that never used to happen, at work I'm constantly on edge, never relaxed and always questioning myself in my mind.
First 2 months I was living in a haze, brain was severely clouded and everything felt fake, as if I was watching myself from a third person perspective.
Cognitive abilities- Short term memory noticeably affected, sometimes struggle to find the right word (this has improved).
Before LTC, I used to do whatever and didn't give a shit, acting goofy, making jokes and always having an opnion in my social circle but now I have nothing on my mind.
I just want the drive and energy for like back. Im so so tired.
Its just so demoralising that the fact its taking so long to recover.
Trying to stay positive.
Click to expand...
I'm coming up to 2 years in October and haven't really improved much all I can say is eat right stop doing drugs and stay away from anti depressants
 
iwanttobenormal said:
Hey all, currently on month 4.5 of LTC.
I've been experiencing a myriad of symptoms which have impacted my life severely to the point where I'm questioning my existence. Being 19, the future just seems so bleak. I'm smart, attend a go8 uni and had a bright future ahead of me but things have taken a turn for the worst.-
Here are my symptoms:
Depression- Most prominently emotional numbness/blank and apathy, my mood is mostly flat and dull, things that sparked emotion prior to LTC don't affect me at all now. I also lost all interest in my hobbies and things that sparked joy in my life. It's as if the dopamine reward circuit in my brain shut off. Just going through the motions nowadays. Everything feels/is 'meh' at most. No motivation to do anything except sleep. Was obsessed with bodybuilding and fitness before, but nowadays finding the motivation to hit the gym is very difficult. IT feels as though my former self and personality has been completely stripped away from me. Just empty.
Anxiety- Cannot get restful sleep as my mind is constantly racing with thoughts. Wake up feeling like shit, that dread 'ughhh' feeling when thinking about the day ahead. Random bouts of feelings of impending doom during the first month. Random bouts of anxiety occurs that never used to happen, at work I'm constantly on edge, never relaxed and always questioning myself in my mind.
First 2 months I was living in a haze, brain was severely clouded and everything felt fake, as if I was watching myself from a third person perspective.
Cognitive abilities- Short term memory noticeably affected, sometimes struggle to find the right word (this has improved).
Before LTC, I used to do whatever and didn't give a shit, acting goofy, making jokes and always having an opnion in my social circle but now I have nothing on my mind.
I just want the drive and energy for life back. Im so so tired.
I know for a fact that'll recover, Its just so demoralising that the fact its taking so long.
Ill be off these forums as excessively ruminating on this will do no good and only hinder the recovery process.
Will update when I recover.
Stay positive and keep fighting <3
Click to expand...
Hey, real sorry man for your suffering and unhappiness. I want to encourage you to do just one thing- keep hope! It is vital and instrumental here for recovery, or to put it another way- navigating your way out of the Maze you have wandered into is how I like to see it.

A maze can seem like there is no way out and no hope when actually there usually is a way out and keeping that belief to keep looking for it is absolutely vital to actually finding the exit but also to your mindset and emotions and experience while you are in that Maze.

It can be heaven or Hell depending on what we think and believe anything in life can be like that any single experience on any single day if we have overbearing anxiety and fear and negative thought patterns and beliefs we can be having a truly terrible time unable to think and functions and look forward and suffering physically.

I know this because I suffer with extremely severe anxiety myself due to debilitating, complicated and demanding health conditions and I can see how for absolutely no reason other than my mind and emotions I can feel absolutely terrible in every sense physical and mental depending on the thoughts in my head and vice versa when these anxieties are cleared and put to rest.

So please try to be mindful of the fact that things can appear to be so much worse because of thought patterns and conditioning and when we completely believe that things are fixed and that we have no power this can create an illusion of hopelessness and despair.

So I only wish to encourage you and remind you to please hold hope and belief even if you find it difficult at presents hold that thought high and expect to recover without doubting it and without fear.

And yes I wouldn't discourage you from taking a break from reading about and thinking about this subject so that you can gradually ruminate less about it and just focus on taking one day at a time and being thankful for anything you can in life which I'm sure would be a good exercise for you to practice we all have so much more to be thankful for than we keep ourselves conscious of.


I just wanted to ask you out of curiosity and in the interest of objectivity here and learning from all experiences what sort of MDMA usage lead to your LTC?

Of course you don't need to answer that I'm just interested and curious.

Wishing you all the best bro stay strong and like I say hold hope there is always so much more hope and potential than we realise.
 
AutoTripper said:
Hey, real sorry man for your suffering and unhappiness. I want to encourage you to do just one thing- keep hope! It is vital and instrumental here for recovery, or to put it another way- navigating your way out of the Maze you have wandered into is how I like to see it.

A maze can seem like there is no way out and no hope when actually there usually is a way out and keeping that belief to keep looking for it is absolutely vital to actually finding the exit but also to your mindset and emotions and experience while you are in that Maze.

It can be heaven or Hell depending on what we think and believe anything in life can be like that any single experience on any single day if we have overbearing anxiety and fear and negative thought patterns and beliefs we can be having a truly terrible time unable to think and functions and look forward and suffering physically.

I know this because I suffer with extremely severe anxiety myself due to debilitating, complicated and demanding health conditions and I can see how for absolutely no reason other than my mind and emotions I can feel absolutely terrible in every sense physical and mental depending on the thoughts in my head and vice versa when these anxieties are cleared and put to rest.

So please try to be mindful of the fact that things can appear to be so much worse because of thought patterns and conditioning and when we completely believe that things are fixed and that we have no power this can create an illusion of hopelessness and despair.

So I only wish to encourage you and remind you to please hold hope and belief even if you find it difficult at presents hold that thought high and expect to recover without doubting it and without fear.

And yes I wouldn't discourage you from taking a break from reading about and thinking about this subject so that you can gradually ruminate less about it and just focus on taking one day at a time and being thankful for anything you can in life which I'm sure would be a good exercise for you to practice we all have so much more to be thankful for than we keep ourselves conscious of.


I just wanted to ask you out of curiosity and in the interest of objectivity here and learning from all experiences what sort of MDMA usage lead to your LTC?

Of course you don't need to answer that I'm just interested and curious.

Wishing you all the best bro stay strong and like I say hold hope there is always so much more hope and potential than we realise.
Click to expand...
Hey man, appreciate your positivity! We are all in this together and its only a matter of time before this becomes a distant memory. And for my usage, I took 400-500mgs~ of MDMA every 4 weeks for 3 months.
 
today passes exactly three years after the last use of mdma, a headache that lasted almost 2 years has gone away and is not coming back for 3 weeks, very good memory, brainfrogs gone, more energy, a new man was born, only slight muscle tremors were left, but there are more and more rarer, perhaps much earlier it would be better but I flooded alcohol, poor diet and great pornography, from January 1, 2019 healthy diet, sport, meditation, I feel really good, I am glad that a headache that lasted almost 2 years has gone, I'm doing better with stress
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top