• TDS Moderators: mafioso | mal3volent | Xorkoth

Blog Kicking Kratom Once and For All!!!

KratomDemon

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 17, 2014
Messages
246
Day 62 - son and I flying solo until mommy gets home from her business trip later Tuesday. Everyone have a nice week!
 

KratomDemon

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 17, 2014
Messages
246
capsules came yesterday. Had some last night while enjoying the republican debate and then this evening while helping my inlaws setup a new PC I bought them. They are all gone now and don't feel any kind of draw to get more. We will see if this decision was ultimately a bad one or not. I suppose tomorrow will be back to day 1 - but get to see the new Star Wars film after work!
 

KratomDemon

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 17, 2014
Messages
246
Can't get the Star Wars theme out of my head today. Work can't end soon enough so I can head to the theatre for the Force Awakens!

Anyone else seeing it today?
 

Erikmen

Bluelight Crew
Joined
May 3, 2014
Messages
20,805
capsules came yesterday. Had some last night while enjoying the republican debate and then this evening while helping my inlaws setup a new PC I bought them. They are all gone now and don't feel any kind of draw to get more. We will see if this decision was ultimately a bad one or not. I suppose tomorrow will be back to day 1 - but get to see the new Star Wars film after work!
Too bad. You seem quite determined. Start over!
At least you don't get the withdrawals now, right.
 

KratomDemon

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 17, 2014
Messages
246
Day 2

Had a holiday party at our house last night which was a ton of fun. 3 more working days until Xmas!
 

stillkickin

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 3, 2015
Messages
199
Location
In between flusteringly clean and blissfully not
I'm curious as to if the build up of all the thoughts pre-order to delivery to final consumption felt like they were satisfied by this brief foray back into kratom territory? Wondering your thoughts now that the "relapse" has come and gone. I've been busting my ass working on kicking opiates over the last month or two but I'm still having those couple day binges that derail my short-term progress. I guess what I'm getting at is it always seems like a let down when I finally satisfy my cravings; then I wake up and it's the next day and I'm generally feeling down on myself and have at least 2 days where my body is repenting for my actions. Granted, I didn't have 60 days of good behavior when my slips occur.
 

KratomDemon

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 17, 2014
Messages
246
I am feeling good. Yes I did give into my cravings but I felt no guilt when I was using it. I very much recognize that I still can't have any on hand or I will not be able to resist. I have no issues with myself if I were able to use a handful of times a year but I would need to take careful steps to safeguard against falling back into the throws of addiction and even then - I am not convinced this is a very wise long term strategy.

I'm taking each day as it comes and right now I am in a good place mentally and physically and looking forward to my first Christmas in sometime not needing to dose kratom just to enjoy Christmas morning with the family.
 

KratomDemon

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 17, 2014
Messages
246
Monday is Never good ;)

It's over for me now though. 2 more work days until a little holiday break.

I had the "opportunity" to run out and pick up some more kratom today which I toyed with for a little before dismissing it as a really bad idea. I reminded myself of the physician and mental anguish that withdrawals were just a few short months ago and that I would be most certainly headed down a dangerous path if I get yet more kratom.
 

herbavore

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Jul 26, 2011
Messages
14,922
Location
in a dream
^The rational brain can sometimes come through like a white knight to save us from ourselves!;) Keep up the rebellion against addiction and nurture yourself in other ways. You are doing amazing work--not just against an addiction but in creating the life that you want. <3
 
Top