Cocaine Iv cocaine ptsd?

[d3lnarg0]

So I had become an iv user with anything worth slamming Ieasily had a good 25 nights of iving blow n hearing the trains n generally always had some level of euphoria or enjoyable rush. After moving in to a buddy's apartment who used every day. In huge portions compared to mewould do his shot n not 5 seconds later have a look of utter terror most often fixating on the door or window... like at any moment it was going to get.kicked down ... after a couple minutes of this his normal routine was to grab a pair of large scissors and hold them so they would be concealed up his sleeve. swimwould shrug it off and ignore his actions n crazy energy without issue.. until 1 night.. already saturated with a teener of fire fish scale pushed his limit. 15seconds after hit I'm in uncontrollably convulsing on the floor.im feels very alert and aware. Crystal clear voices n sounds of a women knocking on the front door n calling my roommates name. Now I cannot even do the smallest shot without getting a wave of terror along with vivid whispers. So Ip cannot use coke at all anymore , speedballs with black were a favored doc. Now no euphoria, no fun , only anxiety and horrible emotions. I tries a couple times a year out of curiosity but it is now 8 years with this same PTSD.has anyone else experienced 1anything like this?


Pls pardon the editing. my mobile fkin sucks n keeps recalling

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

I can see how that may be traumatic. A curse and a blessing, i guess?

I have not experienced the paranoia/anxiety (that intensely), but i don't think you're alone.

BTW - We don't use SWIM here.

Welcome to Bluelight.

 

[d3lnarg0]

Ahh ok, sorry, will fix that. Thank you.. after a decade reading these forums I decided to create an account. welll.. a little about myself.. 30yr old polysubstance abusing inventor. Slammed my first a215 a decade ago n basically tried anything n everything I could find atleast once. My docs are opiates n mdma . I least enjoy ketamine and peyote. I did webcam porn for 3 years with an ex girlfriend to afford solely to sustain my opiate addiction. I enjoyed.skateboarding n snowboarding n outdoorsy activities before my habit took full control of my daily routine. I originally became opiate dependent@ 18 yrs old, taking vicodin after working out unaware of withdrawls n what power it had.

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

Cool - i love snowboarding!

Though i dislocated my shoulders many times doing so.

Luckily no broken wrist.

Drugs can take a lot from us.. but i like remembering the good times, and making room for more.

Welcome again dude.

 

[MDPV_Psychosis]

In the beginning I did not experience psychosis symptoms. I could use really hard for days on end without eating or sleeping and still keep my shit together. Eventually, though, I had my first true episode of stimulant induced psychosis where I thought people were following me, heard helicopters in the air, believed cameras where in the walls, everyone was out to kill me, etc.

This first episode only happened after staying up for a very long time (6 days) and while using very very heavily, probably actually an OD looking back on it.

After that first episode it started happening more and more often and would occur sooner in the binge. Eventually it got to the point where I could experience psychosis from just using a normal amount even while well rested and well fed.

Stimulant induced psychosis is like a learned state that your mind can snap back into easier and easier each time.

Now, even after several years of not using, I can start to experience those symptoms almost immediately anytime I start to use again.

 

[Sertürner]

I have very bad PTSD from IV cocaine. I killed myself on it. It was absolutely horrifying. I dont remember too much of it I think.
I did a shot as usual during my binge at the time. I remember thinking it was a little large and was nervous about it but I was pretty sure everything was going to be just fine like it had every other time.
I took the shot and and got a bellringer, it wasnt going away like it should've though. My buddy gave me ice cubes to hold on to and made tuck my head below my knees. Everything sounded distorted, the ice was melting very quick, I my heart was pounding and I could see it pulsing through my shirt. My buddy asked if I was ok. It didnt sound like that that though. It was gibberish to me, that's when I panicked and realized something was wrong. I think I stood up in a state of panic, everything went white. I woke up with paramedics over me. I had seized severely and and turns out my heart had stopped for around 2min I think. Maybe longer but I'm not sure.

Every time I have touched cocaine since I have massive panic attacks. I am terrified of cocaine now.

 

[d3lnarg0]

"

I have very bad PTSD from IV cocaine. I killed myself on it. It was absolutely horrifying. I dont remember too much of it I think.
I did a shot as usual during my binge at the time. I remember thinking it was a little large and was nervous about it but I was pretty sure everything was going to be just fine like it had every other time.
I took the shot and and got a bellringer, it wasnt going away like it should've though. My buddy gave me ice cubes to hold on to and made tuck my head below my knees. Everything sounded distorted, the ice was melting very quick, I my heart was pounding and I could see it pulsing through my shirt. My buddy asked if I was ok. It didnt sound like that that though. It was gibberish to me, that's when I panicked and realized something was wrong. I think I stood up in a state of panic, everything went white. I woke up with paramedics over me. I had seized severely and and turns out my heart had stopped for around 2min I think. Maybe longer but I'm not sure.

Every time I have touched cocaine since I have massive panic attacks. I am terrified of cocaine now.

Wow .. I'm glad you are here today to share the experience. One of the scariest things I remember vividly is feeling my heart beating very irregular...like beat...beat..beat..beatbeatbeat
....................beat.......beatbeat.................beat literally it was like it was not beating for a few seconds at times..

 

[emkee_reinvented]

Men what a intense read. Be glad you made it somehow.

After abusing Ephedra, Cocaine and Methylphenidate. Luckily my roa was oral or nasal. But anything remotely like this Noradrenalin/ Adrenalin drug's is a no go. Like those Cathinone's they come up with. Methylone was ok though.

 

[d3lnarg0]

After 3 years of not being able to find it from anyone ,my homegirl plug calls me 4 months ago to let me know "sing sing" was back in town. She's referring to a chunky white clumpy substance she would advertise as China white, even with my constant verbal correction that it wasnt true china.. which I only could discern after a business venture of 40lbs of mid grade outdoor was 100% mine. That would barely fetch a grand per if I was very lucky, but in Columbus ohio would easily fetch 3.2per. So my lifelong comrade n business partner load up 4 pounds inexperienced in cross country police influence. We both had a very small issue. Easily sustained by a dub of tar per day. We arrive and take a walk down the "main college bar party street" and the first encounter we have is a gutterpunk attired little white guy asking if we could bum him a cig. After being near certain he had no law affiliation I ask him if he knew anyone that would be interested in the green we had available. Without divulging our IV opiate issue he goes on to tell us that his roommate would be very interested but sadly could only trade Raw China for it until he could flip that for cash.. It was the most amazing rush of excitement. coming from a smaller town in southern CO we only had ever found Tar even actively searching for the White. Long story short. We lasted a month in Ohio before agreeing to leave before we fuxked off our real chance to come up . We had made 500 cash off 4lbs cause of the ripoff deals we agreed to do have a nice steady supply of China and Crack every day for that month. So I had been familiarized and experienced in The true China White. The stuff my homegirl had was some fentanyl based creation that literally .02gs would case me with a daily gram of good tar tolerance..My girlfriend making me promise I would never do it again after she found me out cold before she decided to ever try heroin. Fast forward 3 years to 4 months ago when I get the call saying it has returned.I explain that it does the same, just will take way less n be more affordable. I have only used black a few times since its return. Slamming a half gram shot n barley feeling it at all. We have jacked our tolerances up to splitting a gram a day of this fent derivative that costs 160 a g and a tolerance of truly insane proportion. The plug is paying 800 a zip for it n charging 4grand a zip... this is truly impacted my overall emotional state since finding out last week what she pays.. Even if we could get it for 1600 all of our constant struggles n stress over maintaining our daily requirement to function. I think its time to bust out the chemistry books n put all this misplaced frustration n negative energy into something useful

 

[neversickanymore]

Hey.. sorry to hear of your experience,, in my opinion it never switches back. Sorry its just gone. Consider switching to banging amphetamine salts / Adderall. It kills the insane drive to line coke as that desire does not disappear just because the real effects have become a nightmare. If you try this please post and continue to post your results. Also Feel free to PM me as I may be able to lend some insight/help with your struggle.

 

[nznity]

I have the same thing, can't IV Cocaine anymore. The paranoia Is just wayyy too fucking intense.