Opioids I Argue In My Head that Roxys Are The PERFECT Anti-depressant... Do You Too?

[Erikmen]

The problem with opioids is that they ARE great antidepressants.

As long as you use it very frequently. Lots of endorphin.
I'm sober from opiates and my depression comes and goes. I feel my body is relearning to produce what my brain needs.

 

[tricomb]

I used to think so, but that's just a fucking delusion of the addiction. Getting clean made me realize just how much those fucking roxis took away from my life and contributed to further and extremely severe depression especially during PAWS, which for me lasted about a year and a half due to the extent of my opioid use and the length of my dependency, more than half my life. It's a bandaid for a .50AE gunshot wound.

 

[Erikmen]

I hear you. It took 24 years away from my life and I still struggle to keep sober after almost 5 months. My detox was from Methadone. I had thought that my life was totally normal when I didn´t do "street drugs" and felt like my life was super normal.
That was my worst mistake. I fooled myself for years and years until I realized I had to quit everything.
It´s not easy, as you said "a band aid for a gunshot wound" .

 

[ZacherySwan]

@SugarCoatedHigh , @pinpoint

I agree with both statements both of you contributed. After wasting age 16 to age 32, mostly on alcohol, and Valium, I hit
bottom the last 3 years age 29 to 32, elevated to powered Cocaine, pathological Quaalude addiction, which placed me in a
42 day inpatient treatment center, followed up by 90 days immediately in a half way house, then the best days of my life,
were from age 33, my first year clean and sober, until about age 45, with AA, CA, NA support. I also lived in exile in the U
SA Desert Southwest all during this time (Scottsdale/Phoenix Arizona). I returned to the SE USA, and got married finally,
but, something went astray. I tested out trying to complete my University degree, that booze and drugs ruined in my 20's,
I tested out to have a "bad case of ADD inattentive type" so I found a AA Psychiatrist,who placed me on Dexedrine Spansules
and Adderall I/R. This worked for maybe 10 years, but I ended up Divorced by age 57. The stimulants started working
against me, I got morbidly depressed, and found a connection for Percocet 5/325's taking them daily, for 8 years in a row.
I carefully, secretly, watched my intake to never more than 10mg per day. In 2013 I lost my Connection (underground)
In the past 18 months, my Depression worsened with PAWS, after once 5 months in abstinence from 0xy, I found another
connection, and I have been strung out 120 of the past 180 days, increasing my dose, from 10mg a day to 40 mg per day,
with 0C Extended Release old school formula. I am now detoxifying again, day two, (usually takes me 5 days) then the
PAWS. I have another supply of 30 more 0C 40mg due likely in about one more week, across the pond. I thought at first,
Percocet was my panacea, from rejection from my only divorce, (involved only marrying a Gold Digger) my drug usage was
a smaller problem, as I did become irritable, and, cynical the last 2 years of my 12 year marriage. Now, 0c is so very pricey,

I absolutely cannot afford it, I am gradually going broke, as I retired early 3 years ago. Too Depressed to work, I have
transformed myself into a complete loner, a essentric, with no friends, for the 1st time in my life. Quit 12 step meetings
5 years ago. I am a semi scholar and have read of some Germany studies "short term" where opiates helped the
Depression Resistant population, but no long term follow-up. I feel my neurotransmittors are really screwed up, as I am
psychologically addicted to low dose dextroamphetamines, now for 21 years in a row, and, the use of Oxycodone, has
really messed up my dopamine system. I attained once many material comforts, but now have to sell them off, every year
just to live, that is depressing in itself, but, even with "he with the most toys wins" failed me" by reaching age 50. I do not
know what to do except I must stop paying the price of leasing a BMW 7 series "Li" when I can now only afford to drive a
US 3,500 dollar 150,000 mi high mile Cadillac Seville. OC in the USA is as high as Cocaine was in the Disco 70's, and I just
cannot afford it. Plus, it is effecting my health, and I now see for me it makes my Depression worse for fear of running out
of money. My days of making a fast buck are over, I have a lot of high miles on me, and health problems are right around the
corner. Just my 2 cents worth. (I once had 5 cars, I have no BMW, that $$ is spent on drug dealers)

I have overcame Cocaine Methaqualone, and Booze at age 32, with the help, of AA, and lots of SEX, but, at my age, the
task of Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome, for I see at least 8 months to one year seems overwhelming, as I am a withdrawn
lonely eccentric paranoid recluse.. Still have my home, but, had to get it titled out of my name due to so many debts I now
owe. Belongs to my sister now. I can't believe my net worth has fallen from $900.000.00 US in 2005 to less than
$250,000.00 in only 10 years. I miss my youth badly. "The price of old age is having one's youth". Sorry for my
rambling and my wall of text. .
I

 

[chitownskag]

Back In my roxy phase I had some chick who could litterly get an unlimited amount, prolly from Florida. Anyways I was in college for like the first year of my roxy phase I met ppl up there in a college town that really liked them and eventually met a dude that had alot of money and ended up bringing up like 100 of them every other day this went on for like 4 months non stop. This is when I found out the best cure for my social anxiety. I was able to hit on girls and acculy pull them. And just socialize with anyone it was awesome. Then I would only need like 3 of them intranasally and it just worked wonders. I would just middle man for this dude and he would still them and I would charge him a few dollars extra on each pill and I would usually get at least 15 pills minimum every other day. I eventually was snorting like 10 at a time to get a good nodd, I didn't even care about the social part at that point, just wanted to nodd out. But to make a long story short tolerance will build do high on those and eventually ur not using them to socialize and use as an antidepressant. They do work amazing with no tolerance for that reason though hahaha

 

[tricomb]

@SugarCoatedHigh , @pinpoint

I agree with both statements both of you contributed. After wasting age 16 to age 32, mostly on alcohol, and Valium, I hit
bottom the last 3 years age 29 to 32, elevated to powered Cocaine, pathological Quaalude addiction, which placed me in a
42 day inpatient treatment center, followed up by 90 days immediately in a half way house, then the best days of my life,
were from age 33, my first year clean and sober, until about age 45, with AA, CA, NA support. I also lived in exile in the U
SA Desert Southwest all during this time (Scottsdale/Phoenix Arizona). I returned to the SE USA, and got married finally,
but, something went astray. I tested out trying to complete my University degree, that booze and drugs ruined in my 20's,
I tested out to have a "bad case of ADD inattentive type" so I found a AA Psychiatrist,who placed me on Dexedrine Spansules
and Adderall I/R. This worked for maybe 10 years, but I ended up Divorced by age 57. The stimulants started working
against me, I got morbidly depressed, and found a connection for Percocet 5/325's taking them daily, for 8 years in a row.
I carefully, secretly, watched my intake to never more than 10mg per day. In 2013 I lost my Connection (underground)
In the past 18 months, my Depression worsened with PAWS, after once 5 months in abstinence from 0xy, I found another
connection, and I have been strung out 120 of the past 180 days, increasing my dose, from 10mg a day to 40 mg per day,
with 0C Extended Release old school formula. I am now detoxifying again, day two, (usually takes me 5 days) then the
PAWS. I have another supply of 30 more 0C 40mg due likely in about one more week, across the pond. I thought at first,
Percocet was my panacea, from rejection from my only divorce, (involved only marrying a Gold Digger) my drug usage was
a smaller problem, as I did become irritable, and, cynical the last 2 years of my 12 year marriage. Now, 0c is so very pricey,

I absolutely cannot afford it, I am gradually going broke, as I retired early 3 years ago. Too Depressed to work, I have
transformed myself into a complete loner, a essentric, with no friends, for the 1st time in my life. Quit 12 step meetings
5 years ago. I am a semi scholar and have read of some Germany studies "short term" where opiates helped the
Depression Resistant population, but no long term follow-up. I feel my neurotransmittors are really screwed up, as I am
psychologically addicted to low dose dextroamphetamines, now for 21 years in a row, and, the use of Oxycodone, has
really messed up my dopamine system. I attained once many material comforts, but now have to sell them off, every year
just to live, that is depressing in itself, but, even with "he with the most toys wins" failed me" by reaching age 50. I do not
know what to do except I must stop paying the price of leasing a BMW 7 series "Li" when I can now only afford to drive a
US 3,500 dollar 150,000 mi high mile Cadillac Seville. OC in the USA is as high as Cocaine was in the Disco 70's, and I just
cannot afford it. Plus, it is effecting my health, and I now see for me it makes my Depression worse for fear of running out
of money. My days of making a fast buck are over, I have a lot of high miles on me, and health problems are right around the
corner. Just my 2 cents worth. (I once had 5 cars, I have no BMW, that $$ is spent on drug dealers)

I have overcame Cocaine Methaqualone, and Booze at age 32, with the help, of AA, and lots of SEX, but, at my age, the
task of Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome, for I see at least 8 months to one year seems overwhelming, as I am a withdrawn
lonely eccentric paranoid recluse.. Still have my home, but, had to get it titled out of my name due to so many debts I now
owe. Belongs to my sister now. I can't believe my net worth has fallen from $900.000.00 US in 2005 to less than
$250,000.00 in only 10 years. I miss my youth badly. "The price of old age is having one's youth". Sorry for my
rambling and my wall of text. .
I

Thank you very much for your contribution to this thread. I relate very much to your experience. But things WILL get better depression-wise if you can keep sober off opiates. It took me nearly 2 years of PAWS from my lifetime of hardcore opioid and poly drug dependency until I started to feel a shred of hope again. You can do it, don't tell yourself that it's too late, it's never too late to make a conscious decision to better your life even if it means having to learn basically, how to live, and function, without opiates.

I'm not surprised that my PAWS lasted so long, my tolerance when I quit cold turkey was so insanely high i'm not even going to specify further, but hindsight being 20/20, I'm grateful for every single day that I manage to survive without fucking opiates. Shit ruined my life, took everything that mattered from me, my friends, my family, the woman I was going to marry, every goddamn thing that truly matters in life but you don't realize until you quit opioids for a significant amount of time.

 

[cannabis cowboy]

I guess because of the stimulating nature of oxy, it's WAYYY TOO GOOD of an anti depressANT. it actually worsens depression in the long run. Tolerance and w/d etc... Its a painkiller with some pep

 

[DixiChik]

At soon to be 54, I can't "see" me being alive @ 60. I've either gotta find a way for better or forget it!

I don't want to exist in this facade with blinding pain just beneath, even until my birthday this month. I've long contemplated suicide and must confess I find comfort in having a concrete plan. Crazy, I know, unless you're me.

I'm STILL ASKING...devil (pain) I know, or get serious with the prescribed Oxycodone and live whatever life is left?

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

At soon to be 54, I can't "see" me being alive @ 60. I've either gotta find a way for better or forget it!

I don't want to exist in this facade with blinding pain just beneath, even until my birthday this month. I've long contemplated suicide and must confess I find comfort in having a concrete plan. Crazy, I know, unless you're me.

I'm STILL ASKING...devil (pain) I know, or get serious with the prescribed Oxycodone and live whatever life is left?

Have you ever thought about using cannabis, or weed like an Indica type orally?

Just have a long block of time where you do not have to do anything or go anywhere if you do eat some pot in food.

Many people also smoke weed. Vaping it gets you high but it lasts longer than smoking it does.

Good luck.

 

[rave_itsrealfun!!!]

Personally, a low-ish dose of LSD does that to me... if more research was done I think people would discover it is a highly effective antidepressant and stimulant (well, I'm sure a lot of us folk on here have discovered this for ourselves : p). Acid makes me happy and hyper-smart (relative to normal me) while I'm on it, and there isn't a down. I've been using it weekly or biweekly for ages, it almost feels healthy like a tonic for me.

Percocet gives me a great mood lift but nothing too crazy. I take them as prescribed, 10mg a few times a day for extreme chronic pain in my spine, and they are a hell of a lot better for back pain than they are as an antidepressant in my opinion since they have rebound depression. Well, I guess they have rebound pain too but I made my choice. If you don't need opiates (I literally can't walk without them, bedridden in agony and in too much pain to focus on reading a news articles) then I simply would never go anywhere near them. Be thankful, if you don't need them! Honestly most of you are clueless to the realm of chronic pain and I'm really envious of that, it's pretty much 'ruined my life' in the eyes of any sort of sentient being who considers the realm of worldly existence on planet earth to be in any way real (as opposed to "myself", a stream of somewhat awakened conscious energy attempting to view labels, occurrences, and objects as Maya or Illusion. I never touched an opiate before I mangled my spine, just wasn't interested in them at all, as I was already upbeat and typically pain free. If I wasn't I'd just smoke some weed back then, but it isn't enough anymore (although I'm inquiring into medical cananbis, I'm curious if I could find a strain that works for me. I doubt it though, I'm just too fucked up now).

 

[dez79]

Couldn't agree more however what goes up must come down

 

[DixiChik]

Thanks, Priest...I'd be willing to try (if) it doesn't increase appetite and (if) it allows me to remain sharp-minded and productive.

I've never, ever used recreational drugs of any sort. I don't judge lest I be judged.

I'm simply looking for pain relief without sedation. I just don't want to smoke anything. Lord knows, I don't need MORE reasons to lust for cookies and brownies but I could swallow a capsule. Something's gotta give...pretty quick like or I'm done.

 

[Newin419]

Suicide? Why???
Truly, there are many ways to reduce or often times eliminate pain. Sounds bad in your case though.. However there is a bunch of fun shit to do in this world, and I've been through a lot too. Most of us probably have on this site.. I find a lot of relief in utilizing all sorts of different drugs. Moderately, bc you have to have something to focus on besides drugs and pain. I'm more of a workaholic than an addict, and that is intentional. I have to force it sometimes.. But it's worth it.. In my lowest days I can always find a reason to enjoy life, even if it's partaking in something very illegal. Weed really is great for settling your mood and helping with pain, although chronic pain is a whole other animal and needs specific medication to manage it. If you look around on this site, you will find how to properly use all types of drugs. There is a sub-community of drug users all around us where I have found friends and a lot of good times. Even though we might be just sitting there laughing about some stupid shit someone said.. My point is sometimes happiness, or being content, has to be created.. Try something new, be safe, and open your mind. If you're thinking about ending it all anyway, then what the hell is the difference.. Take care!

 

[DixiChik]

Hey Newin...You need only read my threads/posts which are laboriously LONG to know why death looks good to me. I keep asking the same question...but ultimately there's no "right" answer.

I've no doubt I'm one of those "funny" folks who asks "stupid shit". I know very little about drugs, for which I do not apologize. I've never used recreational drugs and only Darvocet for pain. It seems I am in the minority, but believe me, I DON'T JUDGE.

I have been in pain management (unsuccessful) for 1.5 years. Someone remarked about the meds I've been "offered". Morphine and Fentanyl were not for me. Oxycodone, though I'm currently taking itty bitty doses, could potentially be destructive. I don't feel good about taking something with such potential to harm long term.

Fear of opiates vs. no fear of death seems contradictory, I'm sure. "Chronic pain is (indeed) a whole other animal". It's a beast I've been battling for many, many years. I've done so with a 35 year marriage, a successful career, home and extended family.

I am by nature an over-achiever and a perfectionist. The older I'm getting, the pain is harder to endure 24/7. This past year and a half in PM has taken the fight out of me. I thought that when I "surrendered" to PM, my fucking pain would be MANAGED! Instead, the meds have made me even more unable to eat, sleep or poop.

My mind IS open, but so are my eyes. I read the horror stories of people who are trying to detox from these very same opiates being prescribed to me. I don't need to add to my struggles. I need pain medication that offers "for better" or "forget it".

 

[Jabberwocky]

I'm a heroin addict (maintaining, not junky BIG DIFFERENCE)

this is the funniest thing I've read in a long ass time!

maintaining your dope habit; youre not a junkie tho, dont worry! lol you just shoot daily to help get through the day, right? well, its good to know that means youre not a junkie cuz then I wasnt a junkie either, I just shot every day, multiple times a day to be happy and be able to work and live life. sure, I had no cash and nothing to show for my work besides track marks but at least I wasnt a junkie.

 

[Michael Constantin]

Oxycodone and other euphoric opioids/opiates are great antidepressants if you can live with the addiction. I have had ongoing severe depression for over 20 years and the only thing on planet Earth that relieves my desire to commit suicide is heroin and other potent opiates. Herb helps but I think that for some people opiates are the only substance that makes depression bearable.

 

[cannabis cowboy]

this is the funniest thing I've read in a long ass time!

maintaining your dope habit; youre not a junkie tho, dont worry! lol you just shoot daily to help get through the day, right? well, its good to know that means youre not a junkie cuz then I wasnt a junkie either, I just shot every day, multiple times a day to be happy and be able to work and live life. sure, I had no cash and nothing to show for my work besides track marks but at least I wasnt a junkie.

Well, I'm sorry it got to that point for you. I just currently don't see a seamless exit from opioid use. I don't shoot btw,I snort it. No needles. Severe phobia. Which I'm sure you've heard before but I'm holding our fine on the downward end of my taper. I'm substituting prescribed oxy with heroin. Don't see how I'm a junkie.

 

[cannabis cowboy]

although not rich, I must say (without dicksizing) I don't have a bad savings account (considering my recreational use of everything) I appreciate the concern tho.

 

[Jabberwocky]

Well, I'm sorry it got to that point for you. I just currently don't see a seamless exit from opioid use. I don't shoot btw,I snort it. No needles. Severe phobia. Which I'm sure you've heard before but I'm holding our fine on the downward end of my taper. I'm substituting prescribed oxy with heroin. Don't see how I'm a junkie.

lol, so because you just sniff HEROIN you are not a junkie? only if you shoot? and you are substituting the opiates you would be scripted w/ HEROIN you BUY ON THE STREETS but yet you are not a junkie, right? its because you still have an apt, a car, money, etc, but you have to do HEROIN DAILY TO GET BY, but you are not a junkie, right? you are just a typical addict, correct? well bud, not sure how long how you have been using, or who else you know who uses, but I can tell you it only gets worse from there, so be careful now while you are still not a "junkie" and smarten up and stop EVERYTHING while you are ahead.

 

[Nom de Plume]

Dissociatives and GABAergics are more effective anti-depressants, in my experience. Opioids are good, but aren't terribly useful.