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How High Are You? V. Dude Where's My Bar?

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I took 25mg of MXPr earlier, and took a nice walk with my girlfriend, now we just finished dinner and are going to try to find a movie to watch. Feeling pretty decent. Can't believe how much I'm craving *something* though. Ugh.
 
Sitting across from a treasure trove of opioids is difficult, but I just need to hold out a few more days. Took a few Gs of kratom and just made myself a drink (bourbon of course). Might go smoke a cig.

I'm kinda anxious guys. I don't want to move again. I wanna do drugs and not move.
 
Are you literally moving locations?

Either way, hopefully the kratom and drink can take the edge off. Enjoy the stash and keep it healthy. Your self as well.
 
madness00 said:
Are you literally moving locations?

Either way, hopefully the kratom and drink can take the edge off. Enjoy the stash and keep it healthy. Your self as well.
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Yeah Nashville > Chicago

It's helping out. Something about moving a lot really makes you kinda numb to people. Time and time again I get close to people and make friends then leave.

My PO is really starting to make me nervous too, I'm supposed to check in before I leave to make sure it's okay and I can't reach her.
 
Cream Gravy? said:
Do y’all have cheaper generics in the UK @Vastness ? I get generic for my alpraz and I only pay a dollar eighty after insurance. Almost makes me happy to pay out the wazoo for insurance lol, at least my alpraz is essentially free.
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Honestly I've never got anything fun with a legitimate prescription, although I've never really tried, as I mentioned the prescribing culture here is extremely conservative compared to the US, especially when it comes to mental health. I think if I did, it would be very cheap, because of the NHS prescriptions are basically a flat rate per pickup of £9, I believe around $11, so depending on your prescription, some meds could be very cheap indeed, although I suspect with potentially abusable repeat prescriptions there will be a limit to how much they'd prescribe at any one time.

So all my non prescribed pharms are from other sources, benzos and whatnot are very cheap IME, just pharma stims that are mindbogglingly high. Maybe something to do with the relative rarity of such prescriptions in the UK. Many people shit on the US medical system about being too prescription happy, and for sure there are problems with big pharma and capitalism coming before the greater good, but I think Europe and probably elsewhere too is way too draconian in some ways, like some things that are not even remotely abusable are prescription only when there's just no justification for it, like asthma inhalers (and not like old benzedrex ones, these ones are absolutely in no way abusable - not that I've tried).

We do have private healthcare options here but, again, it's expensive, and meds will be more expensive too. I need to look into it a bit more, just gotta decide if I want to gamble like $500 or something on the off-chance of getting a private doctor who is a bit more sympathetic to the usefulness of certain medicines, when it might still end up being a waste of time. I'm not suicidal, I have a job, I seem to be coping so, "suck it up and let me refer you for talk therapy." Not that talk therapy is not an important thing and I am a proponent of it but I feel like I've talked about everything already now and am just retracing the same old ground and cyclic ups and downs.

Forgive that spiel, I know this isn't the mental health forum, just a bit frustrated right now.

Few hours ago before going to bed and failing to sleep.
+30mg amphetamine because I'm a degenerate.
+4g kratom
+10mg diazepam

Few beers, man that was too much speed today, really crashed towards the end.

Time to try again to sleep. All the best y'all, may your lives be filled with happiness and free from suffering.
 
Vastness said:
Honestly I've never got anything fun with a legitimate prescription, although I've never really tried, as I mentioned the prescribing culture here is extremely conservative compared to the US, especially when it comes to mental health. I think if I did, it would be very cheap, because of the NHS prescriptions are basically a flat rate per pickup of £9, I believe around $11, so depending on your prescription, some meds could be very cheap indeed, although I suspect with potentially abusable repeat prescriptions there will be a limit to how much they'd prescribe at any one time.

So all my non prescribed pharms are from other sources, benzos and whatnot are very cheap IME, just pharma stims that are mindbogglingly high. Maybe something to do with the relative rarity of such prescriptions in the UK. Many people shit on the US medical system about being too prescription happy, and for sure there are problems with big pharma and capitalism coming before the greater good, but I think Europe and probably elsewhere too is way too draconian in some ways, like some things that are not even remotely abusable are prescription only when there's just no justification for it, like asthma inhalers (and not like old benzedrex ones, these ones are absolutely in no way abusable - not that I've tried).

We do have private healthcare options here but, again, it's expensive, and meds will be more expensive too. I need to look into it a bit more, just gotta decide if I want to gamble like $500 or something on the off-chance of getting a private doctor who is a bit more sympathetic to the usefulness of certain medicines, when it might still end up being a waste of time. I'm not suicidal, I have a job, I seem to be coping so, "suck it up and let me refer you for talk therapy." Not that talk therapy is not an important thing and I am a proponent of it but I feel like I've talked about everything already now and am just retracing the same old ground and cyclic ups and downs.

Forgive that spiel, I know this isn't the mental health forum, just a bit frustrated right now.

Few hours ago before going to bed and failing to sleep.
+30mg amphetamine because I'm a degenerate.
+4g kratom
+10mg diazepam

Few beers, man that was too much speed today, really crashed towards the end.

Time to try again to sleep. All the best y'all, may your lives be filled with happiness and free from suffering.
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I really think the “fast and loose” view Euro peeps have of our prescribing is a decade out of touch. Ten years ago you could get anything easy. Now even low dose cpam and alpraz or even dexamps are hard to get prescribed. I went to five doctors complaining of pain levels that made me suicidal and finally one gave me alpraz and now I don’t have to jump off a bridge. My gut hurts so much without it. People who get long term bzds for anxiety irk me because they make it harder for people like me who need them for chronic GI pain.

Like no joke I wanted to die. I’m so, so grateful I found a compassionate doctor willing to help me avoid suicide.

Feeling super tired. 8+10mg O-DT today and 5mg etiz spread over the day. So tired of packing boxes.
 
Morning blue world

Started the day with 6mg bromazepam and a joint. Few hours later I had a drink and then went out to score some H or even see if its gonna be possible with the lock down. I passed a few roadblocks with the army and everything. Got stopped and said I'm on my way home after sleeping at a friends house in town. So they let me go and I hooked up with my supplier in the middle of a shopping centre as it was the safest place, go figure. Anyhow got home and had my fix

5 hits H
200ml vodka
1 quart of beer

Feeling supper relaxed after that. Hope everyone else is having a good time and is healthy
 
It's still pretty easy to get Rx stimulants and benzodiazepines here in the states if you present well. Opioids, yes, they're much more conservative about those than they were in the past.
 
Last day at work before I move so I caved and took some desmetramadol along with 300mg pregabalin. I honestly tried kratom first but it is just straight up not working. Everyone at work is gonna be all emotional and I need drugs for that too.
 
I'm wanna try and order some phenibut today. But that products I can find are all OTC products, so is this still the real thing?
 
Cream Gravy? said:
I really think the “fast and loose” view Euro peeps have of our prescribing is a decade out of touch. Ten years ago you could get anything easy. Now even low dose cpam and alpraz or even dexamps are hard to get prescribed. I went to five doctors complaining of pain levels that made me suicidal and finally one gave me alpraz and now I don’t have to jump off a bridge. My gut hurts so much without it. People who get long term bzds for anxiety irk me because they make it harder for people like me who need them for chronic GI pain.
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Damn, that sucks man. But yeah, probably that's true, I mean I don't know personally not having lived in the US but I'll take your word for it.

I think it is surely still a little easier to get prescribed psychiatric medication though, no? Benzos maybe barely even fit this description anymore except in extreme cases... but I have a friend who's a psychiatrist of some description who lives over there though and she said to me recently that basically if you go to a psychiatrist you'll probably come away with a prescription, which over here is not the case at all, even to get referred to a psychiatrist rather than just a CBT therapist or something you have to jump through endless hoops, and just looking at the statistics (I mean, I have not right now, but I'm sure they're out there) prescriptions for psychiatric medicine in the US compared to most of the rest of the world are still anomalously high.

Not that that's necessarily "bad", again as I say I think Europe has gone too far the other way, you have to be really suffering to even be considered to be medicated for psychiatric issues... unless you go private. Perhaps that's a funding issue with the NHS though, the government here has been gradually dismantling social welfare for years and mental health is low hanging fruit and easy pickings to be defunded as far as that goes...

Today:
40mg racemic amphetamine (actually this stuff is supposedly only around 80% pure, so really 36mg and 4mg of some inactive white powdery stuff.)
3g kratom
 
Binged all through the night and will have taken around 800mgs of this Cathinone has me rolling/stimulated to the Max and I'm loving it just took another dose and I'll be good for 2 hours and then I have my last gelcap bandit time to start settling in for the decent because everything the flys up high needs to come down someday. But fuck guys it was totally worth it I havent had this much fun on a stim in awhile it blows the docks off the adderall I take once in awhile when my wife has extra. The thing with that is yeah its Euphoric the first hours the it's just a gangly comedown and chasing that first feel good but it's not the same. This stuff comes back to feels good smiles plastered across your face ever dose.

Sketchy ass vendor with horrible communications then sent the wrong package and there was more samples then I was supposed to get so how do you know which is which they were trying to push me to get Ephylone hard so I'm pretty sure that's what the big rocks were size of fucking gold balls and hard I had to crush them down for awhile it was tricky but eventually I got it into a crystalline powder easier to handle and weigh to exact amounts and this person is always giving me the run around cuz one thing was inactive. Never going through this fucking bitch again she think I'm some kinda newbie to this thing I mean least I didnt get straight up fleeced for my cash but sometimes if a price seems to good to be true it probably is in this scene where we can hide in shadows. But anyways I'd gotten a fat sack of this and did a 5 day straight run and then gave it to a friend to play with and send some off to a lab to have the drug identified so we know what we have been getting off on this month.

He partied with it a week and then sent the last gram back and I hammered that shit tonight and it could not of been better timing being a shut in these days cuz of being laid off work makes me wanna use more drugz..oh well. It's times like these to live for the moment because for all you know one us might catch that virus and ever be here again and we will lose out on reading those posts that brighten up a part of our day. First thing in d otto in the mornings after I make my espresso is sit down and scroll through Bluelight and see what's new.

you guys mean alot to me <3
 
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