Thanks for asking! Doing better, always working to do better and be better. I'd do well at this point to get out of this housing I'm in--can you say "toxic"?I was on Adderall for a lil' over a year. It was fantastic at first, gave me hope for a future. I went out of the house with confidence and talked to every one. It made me feel like a version of myself I always wanted to be. Then tolerance built and the drug backfired, it made me irritable and disconnected from everything around me. I was stuck in my head, full of anxiety and thinking way too much. I knew it was time to quit. So it's not like the doctor stopped me, I stopped myself 4 months ago.
My psychiatrist was weaning all patients off of Klonopin the whole time. She was only giving me 15 pills a month while I was dating my ex boyfriend to help me with anxiety and then stopped prescribing it. I see people who don't even have anxiety get tons of benzos like it's nothing.
So I'm going to find a new clinic where I can get what I need.
I actually went out today, forced myself. It wasn't easy. I had to be in a huge crowd all day at Secretary of State, but I made it through. It's awful to always be so self-conscious. Everything went well though.
Currently, I'm not on anything from a psychiatrist. I quit Adderall and the klonopin is over. I occasionally take Kratom and Gabapentin for PAWS. When I go to a new clinic, I'll see what the psychiatrist says. Hopefully he or she prescribes a benzo. I'm willing to try an MAOI again. It forces me to get my shit together. He might suggest TMS. I'll do anything except ECT. I'm not going to give up.
How are you? Are you diagnosed with anything? If so, is your medicine working?
People have said I have bipolar or schzioaffective and ADHD. My meds are working, I believe. An SSRI, simple as they are regarded, is doing me a measure of good these days. I take a stimulant per doctor after a huge evaluation that it doesn't make me psychotic or anything. A benzo, too. Oh well. America.
I'm trying to increase the quality of my relationships with people. It's been difficult, and living in this housing isn't helping, but I am getting there.