A very interesting thread (although based on the title of the thread nothing like I expected it would be).
@LetzteAusfahrt:
I hear you and understand where you're coming from. I get it. Sadly: many people don't. I've tried discussing my intentions and my reasoning with one or two people who are supposed to give a shit but they actually don't. People generally do not understand suicide. And from what I've been able to glean in the last few months: it's because they don't want to admit that there lives too are so fucked up but for some reason or the other suicide is not something they'd have the guts to do and would rather live out the rest of their lives until they died fucked up or in pain from natural causes, maybe poor, homeless, or whatever while all the time hoping that things will change or get better or some miracle is going to change their situation. And fuck me: I'll shoot the next person that tells me that "suicide is the easy way out". No it's not. Not by a LONG fucking shot. It is the most difficult decision that any individual will ever have to make and carry through.
Sorry: I know this is not a suicide forum (as has been mentioned) but this is something I feel REALLY strongly about. And it's not given enough attention. For the most part: people don't get it (and that's just to begin with). Take make things worse: I personally believe that there are certain people (myself included) that are simply hard wired for depression and that's the way it is. At best it can be controlled with all types of pharma. but at the end of the day it's always there and always will be.
One thing I can tell you also though (and as also been mentioned in a different way maybe): the peace that it brings one once the decision has been made and all of the arrangements have been made cannot be bought for no money. There's actually a school of thought (based on scientific research I believe) that the lives of people who have finally decided that they are going to take their own lives actually improves and STOPS them from committing suicide. When I first read that it made no sense to me. But it does now. Because you know it's a very real and well thought out option and the decision has been made: you're suddenly free. In other words: it's then possible to say "well if I try something, no matter what it is, and it fails: I already have my way out so why not give, whatever it is, a bash". Fucked up logic maybe. But it works.
Anyway and as noted: no this is not a suicide forum. But for anyone interested there is one. It is genuine and uncensored and with a bunch of very caring and understanding members. It's called sanctionedsuicide dot com. I don't post there (think I have one post there asking about something particular but that's about it) but I've read it from first page to last page. I've found in some cases it's actually changed peoples live and intentions. But if nothing else it's not filled up with this bullshit nonsense of "oh don't worry: things will get better" or "life is like that i.e. bad times and good times and you'll get through it so just hang in there" i.e. the likes of shit that you'll hear from a suicide counselor or other people that are not getting it. Even these damn counselors don't give a shit. They all caring for an hour and listening to your hard luck story until one minute before the end of your session and their fee is then due. Amazing that their all caring attitude and solemn look on their faces instantly disappears the moment your time is up and the next patient is waiting in the wings. Also and for the most part: I think that people, particularly those close to a person, will discourage it not for any other reason than to try an absolve themselves of their own guilt (not quite understanding that it, in most cases, has absolutely fuck all to do with them or anything they've done or said).
Anyway. Sorry for the rant. As I said: this is one subject I feel very strongly about.
And I'd appreciate it if nobody complains about this post or that the mods. delete it. Let me tell you this: suicide and suicide ideation is every bit as real a health problem as is depression, anxiety, substance abuse, or cancer (choose your poison) and the list goes on.
One last point (word of advice): "the gold standard" for suicide is in short supply and for the most part it's usually a ripoff so be very careful. Another one of my pet hates and something which I find abhorrent i.e. somebody ordering a barbiturate and then getting ripped off. Fuck me. How low can people go.
