Hi guys, I'm an 18 y/o living in the Chicago area.
I got introduced to drugs by doctors. I've been on many different meds from a young age. Here's my history - age and drug(s)
10 - Vyvanse
13 - Zoloft & BuSpar
(I was hospitalized for an eating disorder at age 16)
16 - Xanax, Abilify, Hydroxyzine, Ritalin
17 - Adderall, Strattera, Prozac, Ativan, Klonopin, Remeron, Lexapro
18 - Gabapentin, Lamictal, Wellbutrin
Most of these have cycled in and out of my cocktail many times. Currently, I take
Xanax 0.5mg 2x
Vyvanse 40mg
Wellbutrin XL 150mg
Lexapro 20mg
Lamictal 150mg
I come from a family of alcoholics, so I've always tried to stay away from addictive substances but my hospitalization left that out of my hands. At about 110-120lbs, age 16 I was taking 0.5mg xanax 3x a day. I have severe GAD, so it was great at first but over time became messy. One day while at school I took 1mg about 2 hours after my morning .5 because I was having a panic attack. Best feeling in my life. After that, because I needed my dose for anxiety I would cut some days down to 1mg to 1.5mg and I started taking it with Benadryl, NyQuil, whatever I could get my hands on. After I blacked out one night I got really scared and my friends flipped on me so I went cold turkey from the xanax which I now know is dangerous and it was the worst feeling I could ever describe.
My intention was never to get high. I've been through hell surviving my anxiety depression mood and ADHD for years. With my current cocktail I can say without a doubt that I'm the most stable I've ever been.
The thing is that I think it's working because I'm always craving drugs on some level, and I literally can't function without a stim and benzo. It was the addition of these two together that made my mental state do a 180.
I'm not looking to get high, the three times Ive ever drank (w/o benzos or amphetamines for s few days before) have been awful. I've smoked weed three times because my friends really wanted me to, the first time I felt literally nothing, the second time I cycled through moods like never before and constantly flipped between panic attacks and extreme sadness. The third time I felt like a zombie who couldn't get up and it was also horrible.
I've already posted mentioning dxm, I was legitimately using it as a cough suppressant and I took one in gel form. I'm not looking to fuck up my mental state anymore than it naturally is, but I would totally experiment if I could do so.
I'm mostly here to learn more about how drugs work and interact with people and the brain and to see stories different from or similiar to mine. I find pharmacology of CNS drugs and learning about them incredibly interesting and I'm glad to be somewhere where people feel the same.
I got introduced to drugs by doctors. I've been on many different meds from a young age. Here's my history - age and drug(s)
10 - Vyvanse
13 - Zoloft & BuSpar
(I was hospitalized for an eating disorder at age 16)
16 - Xanax, Abilify, Hydroxyzine, Ritalin
17 - Adderall, Strattera, Prozac, Ativan, Klonopin, Remeron, Lexapro
18 - Gabapentin, Lamictal, Wellbutrin
Most of these have cycled in and out of my cocktail many times. Currently, I take
Xanax 0.5mg 2x
Vyvanse 40mg
Wellbutrin XL 150mg
Lexapro 20mg
Lamictal 150mg
I come from a family of alcoholics, so I've always tried to stay away from addictive substances but my hospitalization left that out of my hands. At about 110-120lbs, age 16 I was taking 0.5mg xanax 3x a day. I have severe GAD, so it was great at first but over time became messy. One day while at school I took 1mg about 2 hours after my morning .5 because I was having a panic attack. Best feeling in my life. After that, because I needed my dose for anxiety I would cut some days down to 1mg to 1.5mg and I started taking it with Benadryl, NyQuil, whatever I could get my hands on. After I blacked out one night I got really scared and my friends flipped on me so I went cold turkey from the xanax which I now know is dangerous and it was the worst feeling I could ever describe.
My intention was never to get high. I've been through hell surviving my anxiety depression mood and ADHD for years. With my current cocktail I can say without a doubt that I'm the most stable I've ever been.
The thing is that I think it's working because I'm always craving drugs on some level, and I literally can't function without a stim and benzo. It was the addition of these two together that made my mental state do a 180.
I'm not looking to get high, the three times Ive ever drank (w/o benzos or amphetamines for s few days before) have been awful. I've smoked weed three times because my friends really wanted me to, the first time I felt literally nothing, the second time I cycled through moods like never before and constantly flipped between panic attacks and extreme sadness. The third time I felt like a zombie who couldn't get up and it was also horrible.
I've already posted mentioning dxm, I was legitimately using it as a cough suppressant and I took one in gel form. I'm not looking to fuck up my mental state anymore than it naturally is, but I would totally experiment if I could do so.
I'm mostly here to learn more about how drugs work and interact with people and the brain and to see stories different from or similiar to mine. I find pharmacology of CNS drugs and learning about them incredibly interesting and I'm glad to be somewhere where people feel the same.
