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Recovery Clean and on Auto-pilot

Hey Jess. I've read through your whole thread. Just wanted you to know I'm 5 days "clean" off a 27 day crack/H bender (I say "clean" as I'm taking low dose subutex to avoid withdrawal) and your strength in persisting through the depression and continuing to fight even though you keep reporting that you are experiencing no joy has made me feel a lot more determined in regards to my own shitty mental state at the moment. Perseverance is key. I really hope you feel better soon.
 
riiiooooo!!! glad to see you back in here. how are you? and jess, how are you?
 
@JessTD ,Hey girl You are amazing!! I do not envie you to NEED to be exercising in this FLA heat 8(8(, But it will Help, you feel better quicker! How is your BP ?? If you need to go on Meds to help with that ? Maybe God is doing for you what you cannot do for yourself ? clonidine , is excellent on label Blood pressure med, and also a great Opiate withdrawal, and Paws Comfort Drug ??
Hang in there, you got this, Time takes Time and I have not met one Addict that has any Patience?? It does not go well with our disease of MORE :love::love:
I as well have been around this Hamster cage for a very long time, I went o my first AA meeting in 1983 Ouch !! I practice abstinence to my DOC, Alcohol, Cocaine, But I Have the disease of Addiction , not to One substance, I am Wired different people who are not this way, so stay here, We all Love, care about , and UNDERSTAND YOU ❤
Trust me on this : If you don't Got This, You DON"T get it .....Ever. I have bben marrie dto a civilian for 28 years , she is glad I am sober, and clean, but has no Clue to what my life and mind are like Lol LOl
All is well - ICE
 
Agree with what has been said above!! Get to your GP and have a test for your BP and see what they advise! It is much better to have some one with experience, and training with this , than a living and caring Parent !!
 
Hope you're feeling better Jess, I too found it hard after 2 weeks and have since relapsed 3 times so you're doing good. I also ramble to strangers on BL, it helps though and at least there's not the judgement u get elsewhere x
 
JessTD said:
So I've recently quit opioids cold Turkey and I think it's been a little over 2 weeks without them. I no longer have any really physical symptoms but I feel like a robot. I feel no joy. I hardly speak. It's like pulling teeth to interact with me. I feel in this complete "blah" state and I'm worried it's going to effect my relationships. I just want to be normal and I hate that I'm like this. I hate that this thing moved into my brain when I was 15 and I've been fighting it ever since. Why can't I just be normal? Where would I be in life by now if I had never done all the drugs?

I don't even know what I'm talking about at this point 😔
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You should go on suboxone. That is how most addicts relapse. That feeling can last up to a year. At least it did for me, before I went on suboxone.
 
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