changes in perception after mdma

[paperdog]

mdma has shown me that time isn't always straight and linear, or at least for me it isn't. hallucinations and delusions have been on my ass for years now. without my anxiety meds and anti psychotics i lose my grip on reality completely. when i took mdma it was like i stepped through a portal and connected to something much bigger than myself. i saw "wormholes" into another dimension and met myself from the past. when i looked into the mirror i saw my younger self as the reflection. from what i understand by reading forums and meeting some fantastic people these are the early stages of self healing. i am quite experienced with "rolling" now and i am curious to see what other people think. i am 20 years old.

 

[SunriseChampion]

Welcome to BL!

I can't say I've ever experienced anything quite like you have on MDMA. I have on mushrooms and LSD, but not MDMA. Sounds dope! Maybe it has something to do with your meds, which I have no experience with.

If you feel like you're well on your way to self-healing then I'm happy for you. I also used MDMA and psychedelics to heal my troubled mind and soul back some time ago. Just don't do what I did and fuck it all up with meth and alcohol.

All the best on your self-healing journey!

Be safe.

 

[Gloomp]

mdma has shown me that time isn't always straight and linear, or at least for me it isn't. hallucinations and delusions have been on my ass for years now. without my anxiety meds and anti psychotics i lose my grip on reality completely. when i took mdma it was like i stepped through a portal and connected to something much bigger than myself. i saw "wormholes" into another dimension and met myself from the past. when i looked into the mirror i saw my younger self as the reflection. from what i understand by reading forums and meeting some fantastic people these are the early stages of self healing. i am quite experienced with "rolling" now and i am curious to see what other people think. i am 20 years old.

Mmmmmm, "psychological self-healing" in those with preconditions towards psychological trauma, perhaps. In young healthy adults, you can get away with moderate, very-infrequent doses. "Elucidation" becomes the better adjective in people who are generally socially well-adjusted and have no problems forming healthy, bonding relationships.

In the end, forget about "self-healing", when it comes to MDMA. I'm sorry, but there are no free rides in nature. MDMA is an amphetamine.

Does recreational ecstasy use cause long-term cognitive problems?

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

"Numerous animal studies have yielded clear evidence of potent neurotoxic effects of MDMA that are specific to central serotonergic (5-HT)systems.2 Given the important role that 5-HT plays in regulating emotion, memory, sleep, pain, and higher order cognitive processes, it is possible that MDMA might cause avariety of behavioral and cognitive deficiencies, as well as impairing memory.Although the applicability of these results to the human condition has been vigorously contested, clinical observations are sufficient to raise legitimate concern over the negative consequences of exposure to MDMA in humans.

The evidence that MDMA is toxic to central serotonergic nerve terminals wasderived from experiments in several different species, including rats2 and a variety of subhuman primates.3,4The latter group appears to be up to 4 times more susceptible to MDMA than are rodents. Although initially it was thought that toxicity required multiple exposure to relatively high doses of MDMA, subsequent studies have shown that a single exposure to a high dose, or several exposures to lower doses, can induce the same profile of toxicity.5 Morerecently, studies in rats showed that even a single exposure can result in some manifestations of neuronal damage6; in primates, both the doses and treatment regimens that produce neurotoxic effects overlap with those doses that some humans received when using ecstacy recreationally.7
"


Are your hallucinations and delusions beget of the acute stage of being high, or do you have these symptoms even when you are completely off non-prescribed drugs?

 

[SunriseChampion]

In the end, forget about "self-healing", when it comes to MDMA. I'm sorry, but there are no free rides in nature. MDMA is an amphetamine.

I'm going to go ahead and disagree here. I successfully self-medicated with MDMA and after one dose of ~100mg had my entire worldview changed which led to me shedding my social anxieties and depression. Legit overnight.
I even remember how this happened: it allowed me to open up my feelings to others (something which I had not been able to do until then). This then allowed me to get a second opinion on how I felt and to be able to think about the reasons behind my psychological affliction from a different viewpoint which allowed me to discard the underlying thoughts and emotions as useless and detrimental to my wellbeing. Worked like magic, I'll never forget that night.

I then subsequently used mushrooms to further explore the depths of my psyche which had the end result of making me a more open and accepting person than I was before....by an order of magnitude.

I will admit that this is going to sound fucking stupid but I say it all the time anyway: MDMA and mushrooms contributed in large part to the much improved person I am now.

For those not impressed with the way I am now, let me tell ya, the baseline was way fucking worse.

Are your hallucinations and delusions beget of the acute stage of being high, or do you have these symptoms even when you are completely off non-prescribed drugs?

This is a good question for the OP, however.

 

[Gloomp]

I'm going to go ahead and disagree here. I successfully self-medicated with MDMA and after one dose of ~100mg had my entire worldview changed which led to me shedding my social anxieties and depression. Legit overnight.
I even remember how this happened: it allowed me to open up my feelings to others (something which I had not been able to do until then). This then allowed me to get a second opinion on how I felt and to be able to think about the reasons behind my psychological affliction from a different viewpoint which allowed me to discard the underlying thoughts and emotions as useless and detrimental to my wellbeing. Worked like magic, I'll never forget that night.

I then subsequently used mushrooms to further explore the depths of my psyche which had the end result of making me a more open and accepting person than I was before....by an order of magnitude.

I will admit that this is going to sound fucking stupid but I say it all the time anyway: MDMA and mushrooms contributed in large part to the much improved person I am now.

For those not impressed with the way I am now, let me tell ya, the baseline was way fucking worse.



This is a good question for the OP, however.

Oh, I believe you. I know exactly what you are talking about. It truly is a "light-switch"; in fact, MDMA has a particular novelty over other drugs where repeated use doesn't need to occur to gain these psychological advantages. Perhaps I should have nuanced my answer of whether or not we are talking short or long-term use.

 

[paperdog]

Oh, I believe you. I know exactly what you are talking about. It truly is a "light-switch"; in fact, MDMA has a particular novelty over other drugs where repeated use doesn't need to occur to gain these psychological advantages. Perhaps I should have nuanced my answer of whether or not we are talking short or long-term use.

Instead of thinking of it as a light switch, imagine your thoughts as a staircase where you are free to roam or go wherever you want for the first time in what feels like your lifetime. my psychiatrist has seen so much improvement she said if she could prescribe me mdma he would.

 

[Shady's Fox]

But that's not entirely true, you can have a tribal experience on MDA or Eve, how I like to call it. It doesn't always boils down to settings.

 

[paperdog]

Mmmmmm, "psychological self-healing" in those with preconditions towards psychological trauma, perhaps. In young healthy adults, you can get away with moderate, very-infrequent doses. "Elucidation" becomes the better adjective in people who are generally socially well-adjusted and have no problems forming healthy, bonding relationships.

In the end, forget about "self-healing", when it comes to MDMA. I'm sorry, but there are no free rides in nature. MDMA is an amphetamine.

Does recreational ecstasy use cause long-term cognitive problems?

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

"Numerous animal studies have yielded clear evidence of potent neurotoxic effects of MDMA that are specific to central serotonergic (5-HT)systems.2 Given the important role that 5-HT plays in regulating emotion, memory, sleep, pain, and higher order cognitive processes, it is possible that MDMA might cause avariety of behavioral and cognitive deficiencies, as well as impairing memory.Although the applicability of these results to the human condition has been vigorously contested, clinical observations are sufficient to raise legitimate concern over the negative consequences of exposure to MDMA in humans.

The evidence that MDMA is toxic to central serotonergic nerve terminals wasderived from experiments in several different species, including rats2 and a variety of subhuman primates.3,4The latter group appears to be up to 4 times more susceptible to MDMA than are rodents. Although initially it was thought that toxicity required multiple exposure to relatively high doses of MDMA, subsequent studies have shown that a single exposure to a high dose, or several exposures to lower doses, can induce the same profile of toxicity.5 Morerecently, studies in rats showed that even a single exposure can result in some manifestations of neuronal damage6; in primates, both the doses and treatment regimens that produce neurotoxic effects overlap with those doses that some humans received when using ecstacy recreationally.7
"


Are your hallucinations and delusions beget of the acute stage of being high, or do you have these symptoms even when you are completely off non-prescribed drugs?

when i take mdma i make sure to not take anything else for at least 24 hours before dropping. ive done this more than a hundred times by now, also tried mixing with lsd, shrooms, alcohol, ket etc. since i started my journey to explore the deepest pits of my mind and my friends if willing. i never felt like i was from the physical world or supposed to be here for that matter. my hallucinations and almost constant but ive learned to muscle them through years of experience. when i say self healing i mean gaining the ability to understand why i am present in this moment and what i can do to stay on the right track, which means not falling into the rabbithole of noticing my voices or paying attention to whatever it is im seeing that no one else can see. and as for my hallucination when i am high, its as real as it is whenever but when im high i dont need to worry about them taking control because i can bring out who is inside of me if that makes sense, also sorry im new to bluelight not sure how to respond i hope you can see

 

[Gloomp]

Instead of thinking of it as a light switch, imagine your thoughts as a staircase where you are free to roam or go wherever you want for the first time in what feels like your lifetime. my psychiatrist has seen so much improvement she said if she could prescribe me mdma he would.

The U.S. really dropped the ball in the 1950's where therapeutic MDMA research was halted. Now, we have a worse understanding of physiological-damage-cost to therapeutic ratio.

 

[paperdog]

But that's not entirely true, you can have a tribal experience on MDA or Eve, how I like to call it. It doesn't always boils down to settings.

a tribal experience? please elaborate seems interesting

 

[paperdog]

The U.S. really dropped the ball in the 1950's where therapeutic MDMA research was halted. Now, we have a worse understanding of physiological-damage-cost to therapeutic ratio.

i dont know much about that since im from europe but its illegal here also, might be tested for therapeutic use and possibly decriminalised but thats about it over here

 

[Gloomp]

when i take mdma i make sure to not take anything else for at least 24 hours before dropping. ive done this more than a hundred times by now, also tried mixing with lsd, shrooms, alcohol, ket etc. since i started my journey to explore the deepest pits of my mind and my friends if willing. i never felt like i was from the physical world or supposed to be here for that matter. my hallucinations and almost constant but ive learned to muscle them through years of experience. when i say self healing i mean gaining the ability to understand why i am present in this moment and what i can do to stay on the right track, which means not falling into the rabbithole of noticing my voices or paying attention to whatever it is im seeing that no one else can see. and as for my hallucination when i am high, its as real as it is whenever but when im high i dont need to worry about them taking control because i can bring out who is inside of me if that makes sense, also sorry im new to bluelight not sure how to respond i hope you can see

Okay, so considering you have a mental disease that is derived separately and that you have a host of co-morbid issues, lemme ask you: What would happen if you were to stop all non-prescribed drugs?

 

[paperdog]

Okay, so considering you have a mental disease that is derived separately and that you have a host of co-morbid issues, lemme ask you: What would happen if you were to stop all non-prescribed drugs?

well since my days of abusing drugs are over, i dont know. right now i will be in and out of psych wards (for mental evaluation in my country) so i will have to take extensive breaks, which is why i made a bluelight acc so i could document my progress. i think my expectations from life will shift gradually. thats a really good question but i dont know the answe right now

 

[SunriseChampion]

It truly is a "light-switch"; in fact, MDMA has a particular novelty over other drugs where repeated use doesn't need to occur to gain these psychological advantages.

Agreed. I personally didn't find any therapeutic use to it after the initial dose. All subsequent use was almost strictly hedonistic, though, I should like to add that the occasional use has variably been a nice "reminder" of how it first affected me.

 

[thegreenhand]

Agreed. I personally didn't find any therapeutic use to it after the initial dose. All subsequent use was almost strictly hedonistic, though, I should like to add that the occasional use has variably been a nice "reminder" of how it first affected me.

Would you say that subsequent uses allowed you to connect on a deeper level with whoever else you rolled with, even long after the roll ended? I dont have too much experience but every time has been a "soul bond" for lack of a better word haha. That said I do agree that after the first time the eye-opening benefits aren't really there so much

 

[SunriseChampion]

Would you say that subsequent uses allowed you to connect on a deeper level with whoever else you rolled with, even long after the roll ended? I dont have too much experience but every time has been a "soul bond" for lack of a better word haha. That said I do agree that after the first time the eye-opening benefits aren't really there so much

Deffo! It always leads to a very intense bonding experience. That's why I think of it as a "reminder" of the first time and how originally open it made me.

 

[thegreenhand]

Deffo! It always leads to a very intense bonding experience. That's why I think of it as a "reminder" of the first time and how originally open it made me.

Ah okay I see what you mean now. Do you prefer doing it at home in an intimate setting or at a concert or something? I’ve done both and I honestly see no downsides to either lol

 

[SunriseChampion]

Ah okay I see what you mean now. Do you prefer doing it at home in an intimate setting or at a concert or something? I’ve done both and I honestly see no downsides to either lol

I like all highs best outside in nature. I go bush camping a lot. Nothing beats a northern night sky whilst high. ♡

Though, I should add that I am a product of the rave scene so I'm not not fond of doing MDMA in a dark place with loud music and lots of people. In fact, that's how I met a lot of my best friends!

 

[thegreenhand]

I like all highs best outside in nature. I go bush camping a lot. Nothing beats a northern night sky whilst high. ♡

Though, I should add that I am a product of the rave scene so I'm not not fond of doing MDMA in a dark place with loud music and lots of people. In fact, that's how I met a lot of my best friends!

Ya know a camping trip was the original plan for my first roll but we ended up at home for some reason. Once this semester ends perhaps I’ll take nice long hike on some molly

 

[SunriseChampion]

That sounds super legit!