Car Park Secrets

Pleonastic

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Sep 11, 2000
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Melbourne, Vic, Australia
pekkie said:
^^Car park spots can usually be rented out at $50 a week. I don't think you can rent a spot out for the day.
That's even better! $10 bucks a day as opposed to $9.50 for a Zone 1+2 public transport ticket. And I can go where ever I want after work and won't have to wait around and deal with crowds! :)

It's a bitch to look all this up on google though - they don't seem to want to give out prices!

This pdf file is interesting though, but it's from 2002 so it might be a bit out of date.
 

Rats_are_Dancin

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Hey look on www.realestate.com.au look in the Vic section and you can find car spaces for rent there hope it helps buddy

Peace LOve and Mungbeans
 

Miss Peks

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Pleonastic said:
That's even better! $10 bucks a day as opposed to $9.50 for a Zone 1+2 public transport ticket. And I can go where ever I want after work and won't have to wait around and deal with crowds! :)

It's a bitch to look all this up on google though - they don't seem to want to give out prices!

This pdf file is interesting though, but it's from 2002 so it might be a bit out of date.
Sorry this is a little off topic, but I can't fucking believe that a zone 1+2 ticket has gone up to $9.50!!!!! I remember complaining enough about it being at $8.00.

No wonder you're so keen on the car parking idea. If you can deal with the peak hour traffic then definitely go with that.
 

Pleonastic

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The way I see it, public transport has peak hour too, but at least in a car I don't have smelly strangers mashed up against me. :)

Found this site - www.findacarpark.com.au - but there's fuck all listed for the city. But it's encouraging that I might possibly be able to find a spot for less than $200pcm, which would be better than buying public transport tickets by a long shot.

If anyone can find any sites which list prices for permenant CBD parking spots it'd be much appreciated! :)
 

diegoblunt

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blunted post

Here are directions on how to turn the following household items into a parking spot:

- A can of spraypaint

1. Locate a business near your work that has its own parking lot for employees only.
2. Spraypaint the logo of the company in question onto the side of your vehicle.
3. Park at will.

- Heroin

1. Go to a Melbourne jail and barter the heroin for one of the licence plates being made by the prisoners.
2. Take your new number plates to work everyday and attach them when you find a convenient parking spot (preferably a 1/2 hour zone).
3. After work, reattach the plates that are registered under your name and drive home, dangerously.
4. Repeat everyday, working hard and getting paid while your car accumulates parking tickets.
5. Wait until you have so many unpaid fines that you are forced to go to court. Depending on the backlog, this could take years.
6. When you eventually attend court, produce your legitimate registration, including photo's of that rego plate on your car.
7. Laugh at the system as your case is thrown out of court when the judge realises the parking inspectors recorded the wrong registration on every occasion.

- A RealDoll, mountain bike and directors chair

1. Attach the bike wheels to the side of the chair.
2. Using a stencil, paint the name of a hospital onto the back of the chair.
3. Ensure your new wheelchair meets relevant safety standards.
4. Rip out your passenger seat and install a 'swivel system' and onramp to enable a wheelchair to roll in and out of the front passenger side door with ease.
5. Use your disabled grandma as an excuse to get a wheelchair sticker.
6. Just like your driving instructor had, attach a secondary steering wheel, accelerator and brake, in front of the wheelchair seat.
7. Place the Real Doll in the drivers seat and put her hands on the wheel.
8. Drive to work from the passenger 'wheelseat', bitching to the 'driver' about your lack of mobility for added realism.
9. Make sure you don't get pulled over by the cops or stop at too many sets of lights.
10. Find a wheelchair park that doesn't have a time limit. There is probably one directly outside your building.
11. Roll down the ramp and into your office building, fooling any bystanders that may have previously doubted your claim to the parking spot.
12. Store the wheelchair in a janitor's closet on a floor that you don't work on, then attend work as per usual.
13. Go downstairs on your first smoke break and hide the the Real Doll, in case she gets any unwanted attention during the day.
14. When you finish, collect the wheelchair and roll out of your building onto the street.
15. Ask someone nearby to open the car and help push you in. Tell them your driver will be back shortly and thank them for being kind enough to help.
16. When nobody is looking, put the Real Doll in the drivers seat and drive home carefully.
17. Repeat daily or until your conscience catches up with you.
NOTE: If any of your workmates see you in the wheelchair and get suspicious, tell them that you are scamming your previous employer for a workers compo payout, they will probably admire your tenacity.
 

^Pipit^

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Seriously, go to www.realestate.com.au and do a search for 'Melbourne'. You should get shitloads of results. I've been looking for apartments in the CBD and there are always car spaces that come up as a result. Usually they're about $35-$40 per week which is not bad considering that there will ALWAYS be a space for you (or me, if I'm in town and you aren't ;))
 

-PSychiK-

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Apr 30, 2005
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Australia/melbourne
I work in the city, right on Collins street and i catch the train. I live about an hour away .... so i find it is definately cheaper. All i pay for is my train fare, not the costs for parking too. Plus i like the walk from Flinders train station to work too.
 

Pleonastic

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Melbourne, Vic, Australia
It baffles me why trains don't run any later than a few minutes past midnight out of the city. Especially on friday and saturday nights. Slightly off topic, but if the cops were serious about people not driving when they were unfit to do so, you'd think the trains would run late enough for people to use them after going out.

Since some days I'll be working past midnight, trains won't be an option for me all the time. Otherwise they'd probably be the choice I'd go for, especially with the price of petrol recently.
 

astrosmurf

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Pleonastic said:
Slightly off topic, but if the cops were serious about people not driving when they were unfit to do so, you'd think the trains would run late enough for people to use them after going out.
it's not the cops who get to decide on the public transport timetabling though.
and i'm sure it's more profitable for the government to catch a few drink drivers each night than it is for them to have trains running :\
 

hoptis

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Pleonastic said:
It baffles me why trains don't run any later than a few minutes past midnight out of the city. Especially on friday and saturday nights. Slightly off topic, but if the cops were serious about people not driving when they were unfit to do so, you'd think the trains would run late enough for people to use them after going out.
I think the intention is that for Friday and Saturday night party goers in the city to use the Nightrider buses to get back home to the suburbs. I'd imagine that there are financial considerations; it would probably cost more than it's worth for the train companies to keep the train system running those extra six hours.

As the entire system is now privatised, those companies won't run all-night trains for the social benefits that might result, the only way they'd do that is if ordered by the State Government.
 

Pleonastic

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Exactly, which is what the government should do. It's like the current debate about Telstra - no way is it profitable for a phone company to run miles and miles of cable to service 3 people in the bush, but they're gunna have to do it anyway. The state government should subsidise the privatised transport companies so they can afford to operate until at least 1am on weekends (minimum).

The nightrider is all well and good if you're coming home from a party, but what about the people who have to work at those parties? The last thing you want to do after a hard shift is travel home in the yobbo-mobile.

Sad thing is, I know this is all wishful thinking.
 

potato

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Oct 14, 2004
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friskk said:
Crown Casino is the best place to park if you are coming in past 10 am. Parking is 5 dollars and you can park there as long as you like. Some nights when I know i'm going to drink, I would park at the Crown and leave my car there overnight. As you only pay to enter ya set! It's safe too.. I've left my car there for a week before and nothing has happened.
F
Crown is decent but not safe - they dont give a shit about what happens to the cars in there, there's no security, no CCTV, nuttin.
 

MooShiE

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Jan 4, 2005
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Perth, WA, Australia
You can rent car spaces????

Thats a new one to me.
 

DeMenTia02

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May 15, 2002
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Queensland, Australia
Park @ crown, be sure to have some sort of high voltage/amp source directly connected to the casing of fake stereo, leave window down.

Hide with handy cam and laughter will follow.
 
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