• Bluelight HOT THREADS
  • Let's Welcome Our NEW MEMBERS!

Cannabis near death experience

Dontbejelousofthesun

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
7
Hi
About 4 years ago I had a drug induced experience that left me frightened of dieing. I've have anxiety and a mix of mental health problems every since. I want to share what happened to me to see if anyone could shed light on what caused this.
I was dating a guy at the time who was a heavy cannabis user. He would smoke buckets every morning. He suggested I take some before we went on a date. I foolishly agreed. He said it would make the night funny.
I took 2 buckets of weed in his bathroom and choked badly as it burnt my throat. I walked into the hallway and felt like I was in some type of horror movie. I was experiencing fear like never before in my life. The hallway looked dark and grey and stretched out. I felt like something was watching me from the other rooms as the doors were all open.
I was frozen in fear holding onto the radiator. I whispered all I could which was "I have to get out of here". He said I couldn't go anywhere in that state and got me into bed.
In bed I looked at the wall and things started to move on their own. I experienced an explosion of reality and was blasted out of my body. I was only a Soul travelling at the speed of light. It was painful. I felt my body being ripped apart. The dark sky was filled with yellow shards like stars, infinite in number. These pieces where one my body and reality. I travelled until I could see a blue light in the distance. It was a sea of energy, of unconditional love. It felt like coming home. I just got near the edge of it. It was massive. Then I returned to my body crying and screaming.
It was so frightening. My partner said I was talking about seeing a granny hang herself. I don't know what happen. When I finally was okay again I repeatedly asked him what was put in the bucket. He promised it was just weed. Exactly what he smokes. I questionEd him if it was dmt. He said no it was weed he promised.
I was left believing the pain I experienced was hatred being ripped from me. That the blue stuff was the Soul in our and the lessons I needed to learn from it where to love learn and have good intentions.
It has left me extremely messed up still. Frighten of death. I have PTSD and a horrible anxiety regarding right and wrong and religion and what should I believe about reality ect. Please if anyone could tell me what has likely happened I'd be eternally grateful.
Thank you
 

FuneralFather

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 22, 2019
Messages
29
Sorry to make light work of your post, I hope to renew the post for general discussion but it either sounds like you got laced, or may have potentially underlying issues. Honestly if you can talk to a psychologist about this experience, that’s the best place. Cause for harm reduction, id hate to give you the impression this could be a one time thing
 

Blowmonkey

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Aug 15, 2003
Messages
11,684
Location
No
^ I agree, best thing is to seek psychological help and talk to them honestly about this, they'll be able to help you much better than we can. Sounds like you had drug induced psychosis and have been recovering ever since, wether it was strong weed or weed with something added to it, we won't be able to tell you either way. Don't worry too much, you're going to feel much better if you get some treatment.
 

I_Hate_This_Place

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 16, 2019
Messages
67
Location
Buying Real Estate In Imaginary Places
Sorry to make light work of your post, I hope to renew the post for general discussion but it either sounds like you got laced, or may have potentially underlying issues. Honestly if you can talk to a psychologist about this experience, that’s the best place. Cause for harm reduction, id hate to give you the impression this could be a one time thing
^ I agree, best thing is to seek psychological help and talk to them honestly about this, they'll be able to help you much better than we can. Sounds like you had drug induced psychosis and have been recovering ever since, wether it was strong weed or weed with something added to it, we won't be able to tell you either way. Don't worry too much, you're going to feel much better if you get some treatment.
I'll have to agree with both these posts. Based on my personal experiences with others; I would say they are right.

We can't tell you if anything was added to the cannabis or not. Regardless; it does indeed sound like you had a drug induced psychosis & have been recovering ever since. Whether or not the "weed" in question was "laced", synthetic, or something else is irrelevant. Based on your reaction & more importantly the resulting continuing negative after effects it seems best if you seek treatment!

As clearly the incident is affecting your life in a negative manner. I wish you the best of luck in recovering from what appears to have been a traumatic incident for you. As well as the resulting negative after effects!
 

Woodburner

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 23, 2017
Messages
43
It does sound like you have some underlying issues. In cultures that use psychedelics (and yes MJ is a psychedelic) bringing those issues to light is part of why they use them. They also make sure that only those that are ready use them, and even then make sure that the experience is not a negative one by supervising every stage of the process. I would suggest that you figure out what your issues are and work on them.
There is a link between psychodelics, NDE's and imvle, various dream states/levels of consciousness/trance states. I don't really want to share my experience , but it was not so very different than yours, and I know absolutely for sure, that it was only MJ. My life experiences were a good preparation, I have no underlying issues to ruin the trip. I remember a dream MANY years ago now where part of me was removed, and that shocked me at the time. So I get why it's given you PTSD. (I've also had PTSD from an IRL experience, so I really do know what it's like.)
 

I_Hate_This_Place

Bluelighter
Joined
Nov 16, 2019
Messages
67
Location
Buying Real Estate In Imaginary Places
i’d just not smoke weed again.
Also a valid point. A very good idea. :)

Though it seems like the OP is having long term issues after the smoking incident that are causing them issues?

Unless I'm misunderstanding the post? That's also very possible as I have terrible communication skills. ;)

Regardless; I just wanted to say it's nice to see you around @hydroazuanacaine. It's been a while since I was on the site as I lost access to my old account over the years & only recently rejoined.

I still need to get around to setting an avatar & posting an intro thread.
Mentionin my old account so people know who it is that's saying it's nice to see them around still. :p

I'll get to it. One of these days. :\
 

Painful One

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2017
Messages
1,423
My friend,

Do not fear this experience or death. I don’t know why this happened to you from just smoking some weed but it does sound similar to a Near Death Experience. I fully died and had a Near Death Experience and you are describing exactly what I learned, that we are here to learn Love and good intentions.

That sea you got close to, that felt like “Coming Home”. That is home and it is total unconditional love.
That is where we go when we die so you need not fear anything. See how much you are loved?

Be Well. That was a good experience. Use it wisely.
❤
 

Dontbejelousofthesun

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
7
Thank you for all replies. I'm in the process of getting psychological assistance but waiting lists are so long where I'm at and I can't afford to go private.
Could the extreme nature of the experience be not because of the effect of too much weed on my mind but the smoke in my body has blocked oxygen supply to the brain and caused a NDE?
 

Woodburner

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 23, 2017
Messages
43
Thank you for all replies. I'm in the process of getting psychological assistance but waiting lists are so long where I'm at and I can't afford to go private.
Could the extreme nature of the experience be not because of the effect of too much weed on my mind but the smoke in my body has blocked oxygen supply to the brain and caused a NDE?
Waiting lists? Are you in the UK? (Is it ok to ask?) Doctors (including private ones) are SERIOUSLY limited in what they can do, say or prescribe, both medication wise and other treatments. Ugh, just remembering the crappiness of it all makes me nearly as queasy as the cannabis did.

THC is a psychedelic, so gives a broadly similar experience to DMT (another psychedelic). DMT is what is released into the brain when a person dies, i.e. what makes an NDE. I seriously doubt that you were actually near death, but I know I thought I was going to die. Just I don't care, but you do, obviously. I'm not surprised you are suffering flashbacks and panic attacks.
 

Blowmonkey

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Aug 15, 2003
Messages
11,684
Location
No
Actually, psychosis is my to go to answer, kinda a knee jerk reaction since it happened to a couple friends, but upon rereading this it sounds more along the lines of something like depersonalization, cause you seem pretty on top of things now.

Cannabis-Induced Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder:

Don't worry, you're going to be fine, whatever it is, it's completely treatable.
 

Painful One

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2017
Messages
1,423
You don’t need to see a psychiatrist for this!
You had an intense spiritual experience.
We are more than just flesh and blood!
This experience was a gift. Start seeing it for what it is. Use it to your advantage.

Kick off the Fear and dive in head first through meditation and I guarantee you will feel better about this.
Any answer you need is inside of you!
❤
 
Last edited:

Dontbejelousofthesun

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
7
Actually, psychosis is my to go to answer, kinda a knee jerk reaction since it happened to a couple friends, but upon rereading this it sounds more along the lines of something like depersonalization, cause you seem pretty on top of things now.

Cannabis-Induced Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder:

Don't worry, you're going to be fine, whatever it is, it's completely treatable.
How do I treat it if I don't have access to a psychiatrist. Is there a way of recovering from this existential crisis without someone else?
 

Woodburner

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 23, 2017
Messages
43
How do I treat it if I don't have access to a psychiatrist. Is there a way of recovering from this existential crisis without someone else?
Two things, diet, and investigate your issues through whatever methods you can use. Diet will help with the PTSD, anxiety etc. on the physical level, and sorting out any issues will give you deep inner peace.
Official medical practice loves to belittle these kind of experiences, totally dismiss them if it can, but there is some movement towards actually using psychedlics as treatment, I don't know if it will ever be officially endorsed though. For the medical industry, there's no money to be made out of healthy people, therefore there is no money in long term cures for anything.

For now, increase your protein intake significantly, but not dairy, dairy is dodgy for a lot more reasons and for far more people than is officially recognised. Beef is very slow to digest, so chicken, fish, and ironically, whey protein, are good.
For therapy, anything will do, even just talking on here to people that have had similar experiences will help reduce your stress. I have ADHD, so I am absolute rubbish at proper meditation, but as a teenager, I discovered that I have very good visualisation abilities with seems to amount to much the same thing, it certainly involves a different level of consciousness. I'm very into dream interpretation as, done properly, it provides a window on the psyche, requires no drugs or equipment, and is effective for everyone regardless of beliefs.
Oh, and sleep! Get as much as you can, and if you have problems with sleep, diet can help with that too. So can meditation or visualisation etc. It all ties in together in spirals, e.g. your body needs protein to repair damage and replace used up neurotransmitters, so we need more when we're hurt, exercise vigorously or are emotionally stressed. Not getting enough makes us even more stressed and depressed, Once you have broken the downward trend and recovered, you naturally don't need so much any more.
 
Top