Harm Reduction Bupropion dose safety

[sleepy]

I've been severely depressed. Lately it's gotten to the point that I've found it difficult to impossible to function. I'm not suicidal, but I've fantasized. This isn't for nothing. I've been going through something specific, and about two months ago it took a turn for the worse.

I've been under a psychiatrist's care. I'm on Bupropion/Lamotrigine/Atomoxetine and Trazadone for sleep. And I'm still on a bit of Quetiapine. The antipsychotic and bipolar meds are because I had a sever psychotic break last December. Now they think it was a manic episode and that I'm bipolar I. I had great hopes with this diagnosis because I thought maybe the Atomoxetine would treat my depression. It helped slightly.

I'm also a recovering dope fiend -- herion & coke and alcohol. Because of my alcohol abuse I've had seizures. I had three in the year that I drank heavily. Obviously they were from alcohol withdrawal.

As I said, in the past few months my depression has become unbearable. In response, I've recently begun plugging Bupropion. At first I did it on top of my oral dose which is 300mg. This was only very small amounts. I got a great deal of relief. Now I've begun simply plugging my entire oral dose rather than swallowing it.

I've read, on forums discussing shooting/snorting and otherwise abusing Bupropion that over 300 mg. is seizure territory. Since eliminating my oral dose I haven't exceeded 300mg. However I've read that the oral bioavailabilty of Bupropion is only 5-20%. Plugging would be, what, 100%? With this in mind, how dangerous would 300mg be?

Also, am I correct to think that the Lamotrigine I'm on, because it's seizure medication, would act as a prophylactic?

Please don't flame me. Since I've begun doing this I've been able to function for the first time in so long. I'm my old self.

Thank you for any input.

(I realize I wasn't clear: I haven't used opiates, alcohol, or any recreational meds since going into detox two years ago. --- Also, I don't take the 300 mg. all at once, but broken-up throughout the day.)

 

[Jabberwocky]

I think it is a bad idea to start using your medications to self-medicate in the way you've described. I appreciate that you are getting relief though. It's a slippery slope because ultimately you won't stop experimenting until you find something that works, and over time you'll either bring back old habits or find new ones. I wish I'd have followed my own advice here, would have saved me time because I am very guilty of tinkering with my medications and only half-following doctors recommendation. My depression doesn't require medication anymore if that offers some encouragement, and it was severe enough that they thought I would need it for the rest of my life. The goal here is to get well enough so you can start working on your life again and address all the things that have been put on hold. Don't underestimate that component of it. The medication isn't the answer in and of itself. Getting involved in your life and experiencing the flow again is a more powerful anti-depressant than any medication. You need help getting there, so don't hesitate to bring it up to your psychiatrist along with any insights you gained from self-medicating. Good luck man. Ultimately, I believe you gotta address your depression holistically, not just with medication. Medication is necessary though and is just one part of it. Make it work for you without bypassing the process.

Edit/Addition: I also found myself self-medicating with alcohol a while back to treat my depression. It can actually help for a period, but ultimately holds up very poorly long term. It became a seperate problem I had to deal with. If your addictions are still playing a role in your depression you might find Naltrexone useful. It helps control the impulses for pleasure seeking behavior that can linger well past the physical addiction. Particularly useful for treating opiate and alcohol addictions long term.