Birthdays - When do they stop meaning anything?
Last friday I "celebrated" and i use the term losely, my 20th birthday. It was meant to be this big gala event, talked about for weeks and weeks in advance. Everyone was going to be there, old friends from school days, friends from my time working in hospitality, everybody i knew promised they'd be there with bells on.
I've never really been too big on my own birthday celebrations but I have to admit, I was bubbling with anticipation of how good the day/night was going to be. Seeing all these friends who care about me and want to celebrate with me. You see, I don't really have what you'd call a 'nuclear' family and i consider my friends the closest people to me. I took the day off work and spent the day preparing.
Throughout the day I was expecting txt messages and maybe even a phone call or two to wish a happy birthday. I did get a phone call from my brother in Sydney, which was cool. Other than that, a card in the mail from Mum. As the day went on, i did start to receive some messages, one by one, a couple of friends saying they couldn't make it. I thought, 'hey, thats cool. There's still plenty of people coming.'
It got to the night time and i was with 2 friends as we went out. We went to the bar where everyone was meant to meet up and ordered a couple of drinks and waited.....
And waited, and waited and waited.....not a soul turned up.... I was so depressed....
I ended up being a grumpy shit all night and went home feeling very empty. I guess the pinnacle of all this was this morning when I received an email from my dad, whom i haven't heard from in over 6 months, telling me how great it is living in the snowy mountains.... I didn't even know he'd left Queensland. And he's email failed to even mention a belated happy birthday.
I guess I'm just having a big whinge and feeling a bit sorry for myself, but I was wondering if Birthdays have lost meaning for anyone else as they've got older or their families have drifted further apart.
Thanks for letting me babble...