Mental Health Bipolar Disorder Mega Thread

[damsel1985]

I'm bemused by mania. I don't know what it would be like to be invincible, being that I am plainly depressed, not suicidal however. Life hasn't been that dramatic since I was mid-teens. But then I never took heed of those thoughts with any set-out seriousness, I really just wanted my family shambles to be sorted. I'd lived that nightmare long enough. But if you don't like something, there's always the opportunity to change it. So really self-worth is a questionable one until you work out most people have a dollar value attached to them. I've been irresponsible with finances, but that was in the company of a manic. Ah well. The days of old!

I read a book by a manic-depressive when I was in the nut house. It was a page-turner. Marya Hornbacher is the author. Her BPD is not without some background research into the condition. She's definitely demonstrated insight into it. It was great having one of those books where you always wondered what the author experienced during times that were not documented in their other work/s.

 

[mtu mwendawazimu]

I'm bemused by mania. I don't know what it would be like to be invincible, being that I am plainly depressed, not suicidal however.

My mania was awesome.. until it wasn't. For me, it felt better than any drug i have ever tried. If i could put a name on it, i would say it feels like a mix of testosterone and cocaine. But that soon spiraled out of control into a mixed episode which i wouldn't wish upon anyone. And apparently, medications loose effectiveness, and BP gets worse in time, so here i am.

I've been experiencing hypomania for the past several months, on lamictal 300 and vraylar 6. Going to increase my lamictal to 400 this Friday.

 

[Factualist]

I'm bemused by mania. I don't know what it would be like to be invincible, being that I am plainly depressed, not suicidal however. Life hasn't been that dramatic since I was mid-teens. But then I never took heed of those thoughts with any set-out seriousness, I really just wanted my family shambles to be sorted. I'd lived that nightmare long enough. But if you don't like something, there's always the opportunity to change it. So really self-worth is a questionable one until you work out most people have a dollar value attached to them. I've been irresponsible with finances, but that was in the company of a manic. Ah well. The days of old!

I read a book by a manic-depressive when I was in the nut house. It was a page-turner. Marya Hornbacher is the author. Her BPD is not without some background research into the condition. She's definitely demonstrated insight into it. It was great having one of those books where you always wondered what the author experienced during times that were not documented in their other work/s.

I wish I got fun mania. Mania for me manifests as this intense agitated restlessness that goes into psychosis if I go long enough without starting antipsychotics again. I get paranoid, anxious, and irritable, like the 5th day of a meth binge. If it gets bad enough I start hearing voices and seeing shadow people, flashes of light, random movement, stuff like that. I can get tactile hallucinations as well, like I sometimes feel a presence right behind me like there's someone standing an inch away from me or I get this pins and needles sensation up and down my arms and legs every time I move them too quickly. My thoughts are racing at a million miles an hour and I get these incredibly bizarre images in my minds eye in rapid succession and I can do nothing to stop it and I get these incredibly weird thoughts that come out of no where and I can't even place what they are they're so out there, they make absolutely no sense whatsoever and I lose them as soon as I think them. I can get these sort of waking dreams sometimes that are completely unintelligible. I'll be sitting wide awake and then just drift off. One I get a lot is I'll be walking through a dark hallway in some office building and get the distinct feeling that I've been there before and as soon as I think that I remember the context I'll violently wake up. In general it's not usually this bad, it just feels like I have all this uncomfortable energy and it's too strong and unfocused to really do anything but pace around anxiously while my mind is on fire.

 

[hyroller]

I wish I got fun mania. Mania for me manifests as this intense agitated restlessness that goes into psychosis if I go long enough without starting antipsychotics again. I get paranoid, anxious, and irritable, like the 5th day of a meth binge. If it gets bad enough I start hearing voices and seeing shadow people, flashes of light, random movement, stuff like that. I can get tactile hallucinations as well, like I sometimes feel a presence right behind me like there's someone standing an inch away from me or I get this pins and needles sensation up and down my arms and legs every time I move them too quickly. My thoughts are racing at a million miles an hour and I get these incredibly bizarre images in my minds eye in rapid succession and I can do nothing to stop it and I get these incredibly weird thoughts that come out of no where and I can't even place what they are they're so out there, they make absolutely no sense whatsoever and I lose them as soon as I think them. I can get these sort of waking dreams sometimes that are completely unintelligible. I'll be sitting wide awake and then just drift off. One I get a lot is I'll be walking through a dark hallway in some office building and get the distinct feeling that I've been there before and as soon as I think that I remember the context I'll violently wake up. In general it's not usually this bad, it just feels like I have all this uncomfortable energy and it's too strong and unfocused to really do anything but pace around anxiously while my mind is on fire.

thanks for spelling it out.