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Best Excuse to tell Authorities Of Why You're In Da Hood...

Times ive been stopped I would say that I was either homeless or "just walking around". Luckily i still had my cash in my pocket so they believed me when i said i hadnt copped yet. Althought one time a van full of cops stopped me as i was walking to the spot and i thought i was fucked cuz i had a crack pipe in my pocket. But i had cash and hadnt copped yet so they ended up breaking the pipe on the ground and telling me to gtfo. Yes officer
 
Make friends with several different people in the neighborhood who do not do drugs whose houses you can go to. If you are worried that you will not be well received, or that your habit will eventually lead to the burning of bridges, then make friends with local mechanics, convenience store workers, or any other group of people who have jobs that allow for a lot of free time. You will usually be well received at places such as this. Convenience stores are the best option, because the clerks are usually alone all day and tend to enjoy having anybody to converse with. To score extra brownie points, use that extra motivation you receive while high to help stock the coolers and do some of the heavy lifting.

So when you get pulled over, you can say you are visiting a friend at such and such street. Both of you will be on a first name basis, so your alibi will hold up. The police may find it strange that someone from the suburbs has so many friends in the hood, but by hanging our with the clerk for a couple hours you can reduce their suspicions by hanging around your friend a little while.

Just don't ever steal from anybody. In the suburbs, I could get caught robbing my next door neighbor to the left of me, and the people across the street and the neighbors to the right will probably never hear about it. In the inner-city, word gets out quick that you are a thief if you become known in a particular area. Everybody seems to know everything about everybody.

Oh, and please, for the love of god, do not say to the police that you are heading to see your friend after you have attained your drugs. First of all, they probably already spotted you. Second of all you may potentially drag the clerk into a police confrontation. For all you know he has a bag of weed, and especially more pressing for inner-city convenience store clerks is that they usually have unregistered firearms that they use for protection. So make friends, use it as a safe place to hang out and socialize and occasionally use as an alibi, but don't bring anybody else into your junkie bullshit.
 
I think I've got a good one here, print out some map quest directions that take you through your dope area. When the cops ask why your in the hood, you say "my friend told me to pick him up from the corner of ______ and _____, I know he's all fucked up on drugs but last night he called me and said he wants to get clean..." Blah blah blah. So then you can pull the "no officer I don't use drugs, I despise them" etc.

With the combo of you being a good citizen and all the emotion in the story it hopefully make the cop think "this is a god damn cluster fuck and I want nothing to do with it".

Mainly you just want a good story with all the facts and some sort of evidence to back up your story. Like really every little detail. Also equally important it to have the right attitude, confident but respectful after all your not doing anything wrong ;)

Or IME everytime I've told cops I was just looking for weed they tell me to "go buy your drugs in the suburbs". Lol
 
Officer: What are you doing in this area? Where are you coming from? You know this is a drug neighborhood. So why don't you tell me why your drivin around here at 2:00 AM.

Me: Well sir, you better get used to seeing me around here. Because I am probably going to be here tomorrow night, and the next night, and the night after that. My brother has been getting back into doing dope and I am just trying to find out where he is at. God forbid he should die in one of these crack houses, I at least want to be able know where he is at so I can bury him.

This has torn my family to shreds, and I can't take it anymore. I need to find my brother and get him the fuck out of this hell hole.

Officer: Hmmm, well. What drugs is he doing?

Me: Heroin and Crack.

Officer: Well, the H is on Ave. P and S. And the Crack is usually right down here(pointing)
Good luck.

Me: *wiping away the tears*

try it. it works.
 
musical instruments

I almost always have drums/a guitar/ some type of musical instrument in my car that I can duct tape things inside, should I have the foresight to prepare.

If you have any kind of creative tools at home that you wouldn't mind bringing along with you to cop, your excuse can become "I'm on my way to jam with some guy I met on craigslist".

Or, if it's more appropriate, "I'm on my way home from jamming, I have no idea how to get out of here".


Your best bet is to make it obvious to the cop that you're not trying to give him a hard time, you want him to do his job and be on his way.

But yeah, the musical instruments have been a solid means to an end for 3 years. : )
 
Man I hate going into the hood to score. I need to find a better connect and soon!!!

I have told the cops I was lost and they believed it!! I do have a nice car with nice clothes though.

I like the idea MACstar I think that one would work really well.
 
Yep, you say it is your younger brother. Coppin in the hood does suck. I have been roughed up, jacked, been fucked with by 5-0 of coarse. I lived in the hood for about a year, in the worst neighborhood in town, I was not the only white boy, but I was like 1 of 3 haha. It was easy for me to score because everyone knew who I was. All my friends would come to my block for drugs. They would just go through me and I stayed high.

Now I am in a nice neighborhood. I can't remember the last time I heard sirens. I can't remember the last time I have scored here either though lol. Everyone around here is mormon.
 
I got pulled over in camden on xmas morning one year at like 930 am. went past cop on the way to the spot, saw him pull out so i just went right past didnt even act like i was there to cop. Luckily my gas light was on so when the pig pulled me over, i said i needed gas. He asked why i didnt stop and ask when i saw him parked...i was like uhhh because i didnt think i was supposed to come knocking at ur window asking for gas stations, i dont know what u were doing there. he was like well guess im writing a ticket on xmas morning so i was like fuck! then he ran all my shit and let me go. thought for sure i was gettin a loitering ticket even tho he had no fucking cause to do it bc i didnt even look at a drug set bc i knew he was following me. Got off bc it was xmas no doubt but it goes to show gas is def not a good idea to tell them. After that I started using the excuse that i slept with a really dirty girl when i was drunk last night and am looking for a free clinic to get tested. i hear they have lots of those in the ghetto.
 
ahahahaha good thread.




lemme add my .02 cents.



Find a GOOD place to hide your dope in your car. put the dope there so when a pig pulls you over......

i always let em search the car. "go head and search the car officer i done nothin wrong" is what i tell em. and i never been caught by the p0olice for dope. cuz i always tell em, "go ahead search my car, i got nothin to hide", and they proceed to tear the car apart, and theyve never found my secret stash spot. they settle for haulin off my partner(s) for warrants.

seriously, when the cops pull me, first thing they KNOW i have dope on me, and they ask to look at your arms and legs for track marks, and hopefully you aint got tracks, which i usually dont have. so im like "look officer i got no tracks", and im like "search my car i got nothin to hide", and if they dont find your dope stash, youre golden!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



"youre free to go. good luck getting off heroin" is what the last piggy told me last time i got pulled
 
I didn't say it caused criminal behavior, I said the flow of money leads to cartels and criminal activity. Certainly in the 80's and 90's, the majority of weed was being imported into the United States - it has been a complete paradigm shift in the early aughts to a nationally-grown, high-quality product.
 
Here's a time I DID get out of shit: The city I live in in NC is pretty small, a few shady areas but no real ghettos. So I can just buy from friends who get dope from Mexicans a few hrs. away in a bigger city.

*Keep in mind the following experence occurred after a trance party, still on LSD.* I was in Atlanta a few months ago and ran out of tar, and the friend I was staying with didn't know where to get it but said we could go to the notorious Bluffs and score.

We saw a cop car on the way in, so I put the bags in my mouth on the way out and of course we got pulled. I told the cop we were there for dope but saw them and decided to leave. The cop was so surprised at my honesty he just laughed and didn't even search us. (Luckily they didn't ask us to show them cash!) The other one told my friend, who was stuttering away, "Your gf is obviously smarter than you, she told us why you're here". I THOUGHT I'd told him what to say. They asked for the # of our hookup, but we told him the truth-just looking on the street. His parting words were (keep in mind I'm on acid), "Hugs not drugs, kids." So perfect. Ended up gagging the ziplock baggies up and doing them.

Sorry for writing a book; I love telling that story. :)
 
haha, epic. I've never been stopped in the bluff yet, but I have plenty of things to say if/when it happens
 
I know this thread is just for fun, but I hope nobody who actually is thinkin of tryna go cop for the first time reads this and thinks any of these would work.

None of these is gonna do shit, or help you out. As much as they SHOULD, and some of them does make sense here , in reality they aint gonna get you outta shit. No cop would believe that you came 45 minute to buy some chicken. Or a mixtape. Or that you visitin your "friend."

It seems like there is 2 kinds of ppl here--ones who been in the position of gettin pulled over and is just postin in here for fun as a "Yea I wish that worked" kinda thing, and ones who actually is thinkin of this shit like 'Yea, Wow, that sounds like a good one! that should work just fine!"

Im just here to tell u that you aint gonna get away with none of that shit--your friend, your cousin, come on, u think they aint heard that shit before? when I lived in the hood and when I use to cop in the same hood, and when I would be visitin and chillin with my friends there and I got pulled over when I was coppin, I actually DID have friends in the hood in the area and it didnt even get me out of shit, so I dont know how yall think a made up friend would work out for u.

I aint bein mean, I jus wanted to put a reality check out there, cuz people need to know that if u gettin stopped, makin up all these excuses aint gonna work--EXXCEEPT maybe the "im lost one" --but thats only if you look a certain way and got a decent car. For most of us junkies , that aint gonna have a chance in hell. Maybe if you one of them preppy upper class junkies with a nice new car that wears popped collars and shit, then you could pass that off, but none of us longtime junkies who actually LOOKS like junkies and got junkie cars would ever be able to get away with bein "lost"...They know why you there. they always will. That is their job, its their life, its their livelyhood to find people like you and arrest them.

You would be much better off comin up with cop-proof ultra-safe hiding places for you dope for when you get stopped, than tryina think of a bunch of silly ass excuses that aint never gonna work anyways . Nothin you say is gonna matter, if they decided you guilty you better drop the pretenses and get down to it , show em your money and say look, im here to cop, i aint cop shit yet, so let me get the fuck outta here, i aint got shit" and if you can get them to believe that , then take your ticket or w/ever they decide to give you, and take your "get the fuck outta here and dont ever let me see you back in this hood again" warning and bail out.

As somebody who lived in the hood, and WAS on the block to go get somethin to eat, to go shoppin, to see my pepoles, to go to the bodega for a phone card, waitin for a friend, and wtf ever, i STILL had to go thru all the bullshit with the police when i got pulled over, so dont think that you gonna get away with it if you dont even know the places you talkin about. I spent my time everyday doin all these things that yall just sayin as excuses, and i was really DOIN them for real, and cops still didnt believe that shit, so i dont think u should count on them believin u, thats all Im sayin.

The thread is funny dont get me wrong, its cool, i aint sayin you shouldnta made it or nothin. Im jus sayin that if anybody is takin it serious, they shouldnt be. thats all.

and o yea-by the way.

You really think its a good idea to say ' you jus stoppin me cuz im white in this neighborhood and you ain got no right to do that" and "fuck off, you racial profiling me and you cant just stop me cuz of that" and "I know my rights and bla bla bla"........Le me tell you that is the stupidest goddamn thing you could possibly do in that situation, and like somebody else before me said, thats the best way to end up locked up for possession of drugs that you aint even HAD. My cousin got some bags planted on her for talkin shit to a cop , ended up catchin a possession case for 6 bags she never even had, so it DOES happen, and it WILL happen if you talk like that thinkin you fuckin smart or some shit and run off at the mouth.

Not a good idea at all. Your rights dont mean shti to these cops, dont u get it? they just lie and lie all they want, say anything and get away with it, and u will be the one to get screwed over, so playin Mister Righeous McRighterson with that shit aint gonna earn u no respect or get you outta trouble, youll just end up lookin like a dumbass and bein mad at yourself for makin the mistake of thinkin your rights mean anything at all when you dealin with a TNT officer on a traffic stop for suspected drug coppin.

i cant begin to tell you how many times i have gotten out of confrontations with cops with lines:

"my sister just moved from the house to the university, i was just helping move her stuff over there. i took a wrong turn off of southern and cant find central."

or


"i was at ___________ university and took a wrong turn."



shit has always worked for me. maybe its just the fact that you look up to no good....
 
"I'm here looking at properties... I'm in the real estate business and needed something in my price range... I'm gonna be bulldozing them anyway to make a strip mall..."
 
"My brother's a heroin addict and has been missing for three days. We got a lead from one of his drug using associates that he was shacked up in a shooting gallery around these parts and we're trying to find him."
 
Officer: What are you doing in this area? Where are you coming from? You know this is a drug neighborhood. So why don't you tell me why your drivin around here at 2:00 AM.

Me: Well sir, you better get used to seeing me around here. Because I am probably going to be here tomorrow night, and the next night, and the night after that. My brother has been getting back into doing dope and I am just trying to find out where he is at. God forbid he should die in one of these crack houses, I at least want to be able know where he is at so I can bury him.

This has torn my family to shreds, and I can't take it anymore. I need to find my brother and get him the fuck out of this hell hole.

Officer: Hmmm, well. What drugs is he doing?

Me: Heroin and Crack.

Officer: Well, the H is on Ave. P and S. And the Crack is usually right down here(pointing)
Good luck.

Me: *wiping away the tears*

try it. it works.

Brilliant
 
They sell fried chicken at a gas station on the block in my city. It's tasty stuff.
 
Officer: What are you doing in this area? Where are you coming from? You know this is a drug neighborhood. So why don't you tell me why your drivin around here at 2:00 AM.

Me: Well sir, you better get used to seeing me around here. Because I am probably going to be here tomorrow night, and the next night, and the night after that. My brother has been getting back into doing dope and I am just trying to find out where he is at. God forbid he should die in one of these crack houses, I at least want to be able know where he is at so I can bury him.

This has torn my family to shreds, and I can't take it anymore. I need to find my brother and get him the fuck out of this hell hole.

Officer: Hmmm, well. What drugs is he doing?

Me: Heroin and Crack.

Officer: Well, the H is on Ave. P and S. And the Crack is usually right down here(pointing)
Good luck.

Me: *wiping away the tears*

try it. it works.

Me: And did I mention that he only does really good dope? In fact, I saw one of the stamps that he had on him earlier today, and I think it said "_____" on it -- you know where I can find that stamp?
 
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