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Venting Angry with my dad

K

kenlee

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 12, 2020
Messages
88
my dad knows I struggle to sleep and have insomnia as does my wife and I not long got to sleep so what does he do, he calls me up, asks if I’m awake and says he is trying to help me get my sleep back to normal times, when I said I was asleep both him and his new girlfriend laugh loudly in the background at the fact that they have woken both of us up, so I hung the phone up and powered it off I was that angry and still am, it meant that we only got 2 hours asleep and my other half has health issues. He knows I struggle and have mental health issues and he does this. whp does that? I’m more angry at his partner because she’s a nasty piece of work. He never acted this way till she came along and I will never forget the time I travelled 300 miles to meet them and they stood me up
My mums had passed away and within 6 weeks he was dating.
 
This sounds like it's about more than your insomnia.

Two hours for one night is hardly a big deal, but it's still strange that anyone would do what they did if they were aware of your issues.
 
THECATINTHEHAT said:
This sounds like it's about more than your insomnia.

Two hours for one night is hardly a big deal, but it's still strange that anyone would do what they did if they were aware of your issues.
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I agree and he knows about my issues and I don’t function on two hours sleep but that’s not the point.
 
Flower Fairy said:
This is why I mute my phone every night so I can't hear if people message or call

Insomnia fucking sucks, I'm already stressing about not sleeping tonight
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I feel the same, so I just relax as much as I can in the living room otherwise it just stresses me thinking about it. I put my phone on silent but the vibrations in the draw woke me up, maybe there is a setting to disable vibrate on the iPhone but I am not sure.
 
kenlee said:
I feel the same, so I just relax as much as I can in the living room otherwise it just stresses me thinking about it. I put my phone on silent but the vibrations in the draw woke me up, maybe there is a setting to disable vibrate on the iPhone but I am not sure.
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You should use Do Not Disturb mode. My iPhone automatically goes into DND at 1AM and automatically comes out at 10:45AM each day. I got sick of people waking me up when I was trying to sleep.

You can manually engage DND by bringing down the control center and tapping the moon icon. Silences all notifications and calls until you turn it off manually. If there are certain people who you want to be able to reach you no matter what, you can edit that contact and enable Emergency Bypass.
 
Hey. I understand that this is frustrating, and you are unequivocally justified feeling this way same as anyone else...including your Dad. Take it from me that at the very least (without knowing your ins and outs in this relationship) he cares enough to call and check.. lame ass or not. My parents dont do that, never did. Your father is scared for you, and probably for a reason. It sucks but its out of love. Misguided maybe, but you have a caring father. Appreciate it.
 
Alex_1991 said:
Your father is scared for you, and probably for a reason. It sucks but its out of love. Misguided maybe, but you have a caring father. Appreciate it.
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I'm not sure if I buy that from what the op has said. It sounds like his dad is getting kicks out of harassing him. But obviously we'd need to know a lot more about your relationship with him.
 
kenlee said:
I put my phone on silent but the vibrations in the draw woke me up, maybe there is a setting to disable vibrate on the iPhone but I am not sure.
Click to expand...

I've got an android and I have to turn the vibrate off because even that wakes me up and my phones on a carpet under my bedside table at night

I'm not sure about settings but googled your friend and YouTube will know

Have you tried medication for sleep, if you're not into prescription pills try high doses of valerian root extract or Promethazine they're the stronger OTC
 
nuttynutskin said:
I'm not sure if I buy that from what the op has said. It sounds like his dad is getting kicks out of harassing him. But obviously we'd need to know a lot more about your relationship with him.
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Plausible absolutely. OP is very hesitant on details though so I'm going by my gut. That's different each person though, your scenario is equally valid.
 
Let’s put it this way, I fell over and badly hurt myself in a car park and he just sat there and didn’t see if I was ok and then just took off.
Over the past he made many promises like helping repair our floor in the bedroom and being there for certain events but time and time again he let us down.
When mum passed away I was there for him, he wanted to know us until he met his new girlfriend weeks after my mum was buried and no he just does things like call you up while you are asleep to laugh in your face with his girlfriend.

for Christmas I travelled 7 hours on a train to meet his new GF and him and they stayed for 45mins and despite agreeing to go for dinner later on they just took off and later on I found out because they posted on social media that they went back to the hotel for sex rather than go for dinner and I stayed down there near them for three days and they knew it but I only saw them for 45mins out of the 3 days I booked to stay.

I’ve been putting my phone in flight mode since he did that, I figured If it’s urgent they can ring my wife’s phone or the landline.
 
kenlee said:
Let’s put it this way, I fell over and badly hurt myself in a car park and he just sat there and didn’t see if I was ok and then just took off.
Over the past he made many promises like helping repair our floor in the bedroom and being there for certain events but time and time again he let us down.
When mum passed away I was there for him, he wanted to know us until he met his new girlfriend weeks after my mum was buried and no he just does things like call you up while you are asleep to laugh in your face with his girlfriend.

for Christmas I travelled 7 hours on a train to meet his new GF and him and they stayed for 45mins and despite agreeing to go for dinner later on they just took off and later on I found out because they posted on social media that they went back to the hotel for sex rather than go for dinner and I stayed down there near them for three days and they knew it but I only saw them for 45mins out of the 3 days I booked to stay.

I’ve been putting my phone in flight mode since he did that, I figured If it’s urgent they can ring my wife’s phone or the landline.
Click to expand...


Landline, woah, haha been a while since I've heard that, we got an old cat here but not up there. He doesn't respect you, he doesn't care about you. There's this saying to people who got through life.. --> If you only talked with masks, you will become one, the theatre's full. Real's rare. Don't confuse silver with gold. Overall, your father's either fuckin around with you like I don't get it, you get mad because he does a childish things, yeah that's stupid, maybe but if that's the only thing here I don't see any issues. Regarding your last post, wasn't your main question but with time we saw that you hide behind words isn't much to be said. If you're independent, there's no big deal. Cut him off, sometimes family it's just blood.
 
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