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Harm Reduction 1 year sober from alcohol/non-RX drugs!

Mad Dash

Mad Dash

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Sep 27, 2005
Messages
1,309
Hello everybody!

As many of you know due to psychological issues, I don't have many friends IRL ever since I got out of the military. The closest people I have are here on BL in OD. So, I know it is not exactly pertinent, but you are the people I like to share with. The fact is you actually help me stay sober, any time I can help a fellow addict/alcoholic I feel a little closer to my higher power.

Today is my 1 year sober B-day, I get a small party and a token from AA on Friday but today is the actual day. It has been a hell of a journey to get here, and it is not over, but it feels good to have accomplished at least this. I don't know if I will ever be able to get off subutex due to my airborne injuries in my spine, right leg, and shoulder. But from somebody that started at 32 mg a day and has made it down to 8 I feel good right where I am. In this year I have also managed to (with the help of my psychiatrist) ween myself from 20 mg valium / day to 7.5 mg / day. In a month or two I should be off it completely!

But not having had one sip of alcohol or anything that was not prescribed to me is a huge accomplishment that I am glad to say I achieved. Because the honest truth is there were a couple times where I did not want to go on living any more. I know some will come in here and say that is not true sobriety!! And try to rain on my parade, but like my sponsor always says: "Nobody knows you better than God and if your higher power is happy with it, you should be too."

So Cheers! and to everybody out there trying to fight the good fight you have my prayers, and to those still locked in the struggle you have them even more so. I am almost always around on BL, if you ever need help I am just a PM away.
 
Congratulations!

I nearly firend of mine is figthing through a cocain adiction. He has'nt take for 2 months(thats a lot for him) and he is reducing his diary alcohol comsumption, cuz when he left cocain(after almost die of overdoose) start drinking more than usual(almost everydays) to kill the abstinence syndrome; but luckily nowdays he only drink at weekends and has much more control than one month ago.
 
congrats, Mad Dash! nothing easy about the first year off alcohol; that's quite the accomplishment. wishing you the best with the benzo taper.
 
I've been watching your posts for a bit now MadDash and I really like how you always give others great advice, congratulations on the 1 year, you have come a long way man.
 
congrats! 1 year is a good start to a brighter tomorrow i hope you accomplish your goals
 
Congratulations! I myself am a friend of Bill but we're a bit estranged right now. I have 6 months "clean" as in no illict opiates/opioids. However I am on bupe at 8mg, and 6mg of alprazolam daily. I am also on adderal 20mg IR 3x daily and 15mg of zolpidiem nightly prescribed. I do not take the ambien(zolpidiem) or adderall daily and use less than prescribed. I struggle and don't even know if it's fair for me to say I'm sober. I'm 18 years old and am also a medical marijuana patient in my state. I have no job, car, live with my parents, and have not graduated yet... I feel stuck.
 
Tii said:
Congratulations! I myself am a friend of Bill but we're a bit estranged right now. I have 6 months "clean" as in no illict opiates/opioids. However I am on bupe at 8mg, and 6mg of alprazolam daily. I am also on adderal 20mg IR 3x daily and 15mg of zolpidiem nightly prescribed. I do not take the ambien(zolpidiem) or adderall daily and use less than prescribed. I struggle and don't even know if it's fair for me to say I'm sober. I'm 18 years old and am also a medical marijuana patient in my state. I have no job, car, live with my parents, and have not graduated yet... I feel stuck.
Click to expand...

How'd you get up to such a high dose of xanax.
 
Tii said:
Congratulations! I myself am a friend of Bill but we're a bit estranged right now. I have 6 months "clean" as in no illict opiates/opioids. However I am on bupe at 8mg, and 6mg of alprazolam daily. I am also on adderal 20mg IR 3x daily and 15mg of zolpidiem nightly prescribed. I do not take the ambien(zolpidiem) or adderall daily and use less than prescribed. I struggle and don't even know if it's fair for me to say I'm sober. I'm 18 years old and am also a medical marijuana patient in my state. I have no job, car, live with my parents, and have not graduated yet... I feel stuck.
Click to expand...
Holy shit dude. You're 18 and are prescribed that much drugs? Each one you named are abuseable drugs and your doses are really high. I'm a drug addict but definitely couldn't handle taking all that on a daily basis. I understand you didn't start at those doses but still. I'm not being rude either I would just really like to know why you're talking all these?
 
I understand the feeling, the best bit of advice I could hope to give you is to try lowering the xanax, I know for me getting off the valium was difficult at first but as I have gotten lower and lower I have felt actually a lot better. And when I do have real severe panic attacks I have an emergency supply of ativan. My psychiatrist at the VA does not want me on benzos daily anymore, and I was terrified at first. But he said he is fine with an emergency stash of ativan so he writes me 10 1 mg / month. And once I am done with the valium that is all I will get.
 
Great job Mad Dash! Its a struggle especially making new friends when you're used to drinking buddies.. I'm a recovering alcoholic myself, slip up sometimes but it happens. One day at a time ;)
 
Mad Dash said:
Hello everybody!

As many of you know due to psychological issues, I don't have many friends IRL ever since I got out of the military. The closest people I have are here on BL in OD. So, I know it is not exactly pertinent, but you are the people I like to share with. The fact is you actually help me stay sober, any time I can help a fellow addict/alcoholic I feel a little closer to my higher power.

Today is my 1 year sober B-day, I get a small party and a token from AA on Friday but today is the actual day. It has been a hell of a journey to get here, and it is not over, but it feels good to have accomplished at least this. I don't know if I will ever be able to get off subutex due to my airborne injuries in my spine, right leg, and shoulder. But from somebody that started at 32 mg a day and has made it down to 8 I feel good right where I am. In this year I have also managed to (with the help of my psychiatrist) ween myself from 20 mg valium / day to 7.5 mg / day. In a month or two I should be off it completely!

But not having had one sip of alcohol or anything that was not prescribed to me is a huge accomplishment that I am glad to say I achieved. Because the honest truth is there were a couple times where I did not want to go on living any more. I know some will come in here and say that is not true sobriety!! And try to rain on my parade, but like my sponsor always says: "Nobody knows you better than God and if your higher power is happy with it, you should be too."

So Cheers! and to everybody out there trying to fight the good fight you have my prayers, and to those still locked in the struggle you have them even more so. I am almost always around on BL, if you ever need help I am just a PM away.
Click to expand...

Congratulations MD!! :)

I know this is a great achievement! Keep up with the good work!
And good luck coming down from Valium. One day at the time! ;)
 
Congrats man, alcohol addiction is an ugly thing - I know this first hand. Good luck with everything else. :)
 
Congratulations MD It's never easy coming off narcotics, especially if you've been injured, I can only imagine.
You may not be 100% completely sober, but you're more sober than i'll ever be, and i'd say after being injured in the defense of the good ol' U.S.of.A. you've earned the right to take whatever you need to improve the quality of your life IMHO but 8mg subutex should provide a fair amount of analgesia.
I know one thing, you're sure as shit braver than me, and decidedly tougher, so for that America thanks you!

Good luck in staying sober, and thanks for your service bro, seems like people nowadays really take the military forgranted, especially all those damned liberals, lol, but hey, a necessary evil is necessary am I right? And America being in charge of the world would be the lesser of two evils.....too bad our military size and strength pails in comparison to how it was back in the 1940's, everybody would be afraid of us, even those damn Iranians with nothing to lose but that one nuclear missle they have...it only shoots like 300 miles though, haha good luck bombing us Iran!...no doubt they'll end up accidentally nuking Russia and getting their asses leveled by Russia's most likely extensive nuclear arsenal...but i'm going to knock on wood and pray that nuclear missles are never used, planet earth is already hella polluted...
Anyways i'm ranting but thanks for your service, and good luck staying sober, slow and steady wins the race....but not the arms race!

Peace..
 
I know that all of the substances I am prescribed have the potential for misuse; I used to misuse it and am an ex-addict. I know the long-term effects of the drugs I'm taking and I know a lot about pharmacologly and it has been an obsession of mine for years now; ADD(Advanced Drug Disscusion) made me very interested at a young age.

Anyways, I got to the dose of xanax I am on because I have taken benzos on and off since 16 and have OCD and other anxiety issues.
 
Good for you......Alcohol addiction has been the worst for me.....been clean for about 4 months since my 2nd DUI and I feel great....I used to drink every day and if I didn't I felt sick....I used to be lazy and fat on alcohol and now I have energy....work out and not depressed like I used to be. Like you I only take prescription xanax for my anxiety, wellbutrin for depression and adderall for my ADHD and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. ALCOHOL IS HORRIBLE....and very hard to quit because it is "always around" and "so accepted". Years ago I used to mess with meth, coke and heroin and haven't touched anything illegal since I went to jail for a drug charge in 2006. I will probably need to stay on the xanax, adderall and wellbutrin due to my depression/mental disorders but these prescribed meds keep me from going back to being a JUNKIE and an ALCOHOLIC. I think I should try AA.....I quit alcohol.....on my own and I go to a woman's therapy group which was mandated when I got my DUI but so far I am psyched I am off it.....I have also lost20 lbs........I gained weight from drinking and was always bloated in tummy area. It all turns to SUGAR......screw alcohol....my cousin just developed diabetes from too much drinking. Congrats on your 1 year token.
 
Good job man. That takes a lot of guts. You are definetly sober. keep up the good work
 
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