Paranoia from Stimulants

[rls7676]

So I recently took some Molly last night, it came as a big ol cloudy crystal rock. It may have been laced with another type of stimulant (my best guess is either amphetamine or methamphetamine - have had extensive experiences with both so I'm 99% sure that's what it was cut with). Anyway I discovered about two years ago that whenever I take chemical stimulants - meth, amphetamines, etc) I am on a slippery slope to some really horrifying paranoid delusions (not the typical paranoid stuff either, I'm talking about experiencing shit that literally no one I know goes through - it goes beyond auditory and visual delusions I experience actual physical hallucinations going on where I'm feeling invisible people fucking with me (I couldn't make this up if I tried guys n gals). Along with that I get the typical people are out to get me kind of thing. Well last night and all morning and presently as I'm typing this up I have been severely paranoid. I had to force myself at 8AM this morning to go outside to go pick up my check from work and the only reason I was able to do this was due to the fact that my girl had to leave to go to work and there was no way in hell I was gonna be alone dealing with my craziness by myself (whenever this has happened in the past I've always reached the point where I had to check myself into the hospital cuz it just got that bad where I couldn't deal with all the craziness anymore). So sorry for the long post (probably due to the uppers still in my system lingering).

My question is, once I've turned myself into a pickle from a cucumber is there anyway of me being able to be a cucumber again???

(Cucumber to Pickle Reference = No Paranoia whatsoever when taking stimulants is the Cucumber and Hella Intense Nightmare Paranoia whenever I take stimulants is the Pickle)

Thanks for any advice guys and I apologize if this is a stupid question as far as me being a speed freak and missing being able to take stimulants recreationally.

Oh and my background is that I'm currently 28, I had been doing methamphetamines in the past for about 8 years on and off - more off than on. I don't know if that information is relevant but maybe the total amount of speed I've done in the past may have had some effect on my brain where I can't possibly induce stimulants anymore due to me reaching a limit possibly idk. Also I have absolutely no mental health issues whatsoever.

 

[falsifiedhypothesi]

From what i've heard once you flip that switch in the brain it's very hard to turn it back off. You may just have to leave stimulants in the past.

Also "molly" is supposed to be MDMA, which is short for MethyleneDioxyMethAmphetamine, which as the name might hint, is in fact a stimulant. So although I don't want to delve into trying to identify what you took because it's impossible to know, you may have actually gotten good quality MDMA and your sensitivity to stimulants caused you to have a bad reaction.

Maybe just accept the fact that you might never be able to take a stimulant again without having this reaction.

 

[MDPV_Psychosis]

From what i've heard once you flip that switch in the brain it's very hard to turn it back off. You may just have to leave stimulants in the past.

True. Seems like it's a kindling type effect. The first few times that extreme paranoia and/or psychosis happens it takes excessive binge use + lack of sleep/food/water etc.

But as you abuse stimulants more and more the paranoia/psychosis starts to set in sooner. After awhile it can happen even with a single use even while well rested and healthy.

Sucks but that's the way it goes for some of us. Like falsified said, it's probably time to move on...

 

[HoldBack]

True. Seems like it's a kindling type effect. The first few times that extreme paranoia and/or psychosis happens it takes excessive binge use + lack of sleep/food/water etc.

But as you abuse stimulants more and more the paranoia/psychosis starts to set in sooner. After awhile it can happen even with a single use even while well rested and healthy.

Sucks but that's the way it goes for some of us. Like falsified said, it's probably time to move on...

I think it is less of a switch that gets turned and it?s more that your brain is changing and whatever you have around age 26 (when most growth and changes of the brain stop), that?s kind of what you?ll have for the rest of your life (assuming no decline in brain function or brain damage).

I used to smoke rock all day and just get some typical paranoia (eg every car looks like a cop car). It?s now turned into delusions that my house is on fire. Sometimes if I?ve been smoking all day I feel heat from the ?flames?.

If I take a little time off from smoking (like a day or 2), the paranoia will be lessened the next time I smoke and the delusions don?t start up for longer.

Regardless, I?m not sure there is a period of time you can stop to permanently remove the delusions from the experience.

Only advice I could give is keep doses low. I?ve only done meth a half dozen times or so (just not a big fan) and the delusions are much more severe than crack/cocaine.

 

[falsifiedhypothesi]

I was just using the switch as a metaphor. Yes it's most likely a learned state of the brain that can be unlearned, but I haven't heard of any methods for how this might be done.

Neuroplasticity doesn't get better with age so it's only going to get progressively harder to try and fix this. Try to keep on an antioxidant rich diet and general healthy living for a while, for multiple years. Then maybe if this reaction is caused by oxidative stress you will be able to take stimulants again.

The real question will be, are you going to be able to use without binging to the point of psychosis?