Hello I'm Ashley. New to the forum but have browsed on off through the years never had any experience with drugs till I developed severe fibromyalgia migraine s torn menicus in both knees osteoaritithis. Severe depression, bipolar nos, borderline personality gi issues. I have been on so many different cocktails for pysch meds and pain and othermefs through the years. I'm 32, I have always struggled with my health as a child with allergies and infections. But it really hit downhill in my 20s. Slowly my meds hit the double digits. But when I finally tamed my chronic pain through tramadol lyrica Vicodin and just about every muscle relaxer except soma. I developed a rectocele which is aprolapse because undiagnosed pelvic floor disfunction internal cystis and over active bladder conditions took years to daignose had syptoms since 2016, had this odd pulling poking dragging discomfort, had the surgery in 2017 which was a diaster. The surgery was botched still have not dissolving sticthes poking that Ihaf reaction to not even pain meds as me the pulling poking away. Then had a uterine surgery and endometriosis surgery in 2018, still no relief. Some of my meds right now are ambien, tramadol, valium, klonopin,Prozac,elmiron,lyrica,doxepin,Inderal,maxalt. I used to take fiocet for migraines can't get no more. My vicodin was taken away the one time I decided to try meth, next day ended in mental health unit boyfriend called on me because I was sucidual. it showed in my urine and pain clinic found out I voilated my contract. I have been in pysch unit 4 times since june because I can't handle the stress of this discomfort that I can't fix and being broke. I own my own home which has been nothing but a nightmare contractor messed it up, have bad water.can't take care of it my mom lives in my house but since my money ran out and I can't work become a burden. Feel alone dealt with all this medical stuff alone. Just got in a new relationship with someone I met in the psych unit (he had me admitted the last time Christmas)and he's been in jail since January 19th and we had just made up the week before. I just tired all the time and so alone.