Nutty is right, The body is very, very resilient. i think your anxiety has you spinning out. i've been around and ive never heard of anyone getting organ damage from a single use, or even weeks of using meth, even in very large doses. as you saw, your kidneys are fine. the rest of you is too. Remember, anxiety's first move is to spike your pulse and bp, then it can do a whole host of other psychosomatic symptoms, including pretty much everything you've been experiencing. I'm not putting down or devaluing the way you feel, i'm just pointing out that anxiety can cause literally all of those symptoms too. And anxiety is very normal and makes perfect sense in your situation. if i had never done meth and this happened to me, my anxiety would have me freaking out too.
But your girl crossed a major line, and you feel you were to blame because you knew she had problems... you are not to blame for being slipped a drug. Get that out of your head. You did not know it was happening, and even if you knew she was a tweaker, you are not responsible for the action she took here. you feel violated, and you were. But that's a very difficult and traumatizing feeling. Rather than the hospital, I think you might be better off finding a psychologist and talking about the emotions that are rising inside of you. Basically, everything was fine, your living your life, then BAM, she pulled the carpet out from under you, violated your trust, violated your body, violated your relationship, and violated your autonomy. These things can be damaging, emotionally scarring. I really urge you to find therapy to work this out. Your world seems to have been turned upside down, but it seems your anxieties are your worst enemies now, and maybe your ex too. Your upheaval is legitimate, caused by being so wronged by someone you trusted and from having something in your body that you didn't put there and weren't ready for. your body is ok, but the feeling that are arising are what you should get help in parsing, understanding, and dealing with healthily.
Nutty is right, The body is very, very resilient. i think your anxiety has you spinning out. i've been around and ive never heard of anyone getting organ damage from a single use, or even weeks of using meth, even in very large doses. as you saw, your kidneys are fine. the rest of you is too. Remember, anxiety's first move is to spike your pulse and bp, then it can do a whole host of other psychosomatic symptoms, including pretty much everything you've been experiencing. I'm not putting down or devaluing the way you feel, i'm just pointing out that anxiety can cause literally all of those symptoms too. And anxiety is very normal and makes perfect sense in your situation. if i had never done meth and this happened to me, my anxiety would have me freaking out too.
But your girl crossed a major line, and you feel you were to blame because you knew she had problems... you are not to blame for being slipped a drug. Get that out of your head. You did not know it was happening, and even if you knew she was a tweaker, you are not responsible for the action she took here. you feel violated, and you were. But that's a very difficult and traumatizing feeling. Rather than the hospital, I think you might be better off finding a psychologist and talking about the emotions that are rising inside of you. Basically, everything was fine, your living your life, then BAM, she pulled the carpet out from under you, violated your trust, violated your body, violated your relationship, and violated your autonomy. These things can be damaging, emotionally scarring. I really urge you to find therapy to work this out. Your world seems to have been turned upside down, but it seems your anxieties are your worst enemies now, and maybe your ex too. Your upheaval is legitimate, caused by being so wronged by someone you trusted and from having something in your body that you didn't put there and weren't ready for. your body is ok, but the feeling that are arising are what you should get help in parsing, understanding, and dealing with healthily.
I know this sounds antithetical to harm reduction but don't do "research."
Im very happy my experience could help you in some way.
Think about this for a moment. People do lots of meth, some people use occasionally, some chronically, but if it caused all of the things that your scared of and all the symptoms your feeling, do you really think people would want to do it? If doing meth could just destroy you, think about all the people who use it often, theyd be dead, or at least maimed after a week of use, but people use for years with no issue. It is mildly neurotoxic, yes, but not with 1 use, and remember, you have 100 billion neurons. If you lost 10 you would never ever know the difference, but you probably weren't effected by it with a single dose. And again, if it was that neurotoxic, long term users would be brain dead, and thier not.
I'm guessing you were exposed to a lot of the governments propaganda/smear campain about meth. yes, those disheveled toothless people exist, but it is far from the normal user, they did A LOT of meth for a long tiime, and your not about to transform into one of them. i promise. Generally people use it and you'd never be able to tell. There is the errant idiot who will stay up for a week and a half and be nuts and erratic(i was in close quarters with such for a while... no bueno) but that is not relevant to your situation. even adderall has a slight toxicity, and they put kids on it and many stay on it for most of thier lives. I'm one of those and i'm here writing to you, coherently and with thought. I also used meth when i lived down south in asheville, and im fine. your fine. but i again urge you to seek out a good therapist and psychiatriast. The trauma you endured is causing a lot of distress in you, but i do believe the residual symptoms you describe are the product of your own mind. our minds are very powerful, and we are definitelty not aware of all that goes on up there. If you dont believe me, look up cases of split brain patients who'v had thier corpus callosum cut to alleviate epilepsy. half the brain has a mind of it's own. This same type of auto response from the depths of the brain can definitely cause very physical symptoms. I know it's hard to believe, but your mind can raise your blood pressure, cause pain, cause just about anything. You don't want this trauma to instill a deep groove in you that changes the way you think and/or makes you far more susceptible to somatic symptoms. There's absolutely no shame in seeking mental care. i do, most peolple i know do. And i really think you should, because the meth isn't effecting you anymore, and it didn't damage you. It doesn't work like that. but your quite upset, which is totally natural and reasonable given the situation, but that upset is turning physical and manifesting as somatic symptons. Thats gonna make life harder if it continues. there are people that can help. pls find them, psychaitrists and therapists. they can help you move past this and and change the obsessive thoughts your having. good luck man, you were seriously wronged, but you can rise above it and continue your life. I wish you the best
Im very happy my experience could help you in some way.
Think about this for a moment. People do lots of meth, some people use occasionally, some chronically, but if it caused all of the things that your scared of and all the symptoms your feeling, do you really think people would want to do it? If doing meth could just destroy you, think about all the people who use it often, theyd be dead, or at least maimed after a week of use, but people use for years with no issue. It is mildly neurotoxic, yes, but not with 1 use, and remember, you have 100 billion neurons. If you lost 10 you would never ever know the difference, but you probably weren't effected by it with a single dose. And again, if it was that neurotoxic, long term users would be brain dead, and thier not.
I'm guessing you were exposed to a lot of the governments propaganda/smear campain about meth. yes, those disheveled toothless people exist, but it is far from the normal user, they did A LOT of meth for a long tiime, and your not about to transform into one of them. i promise. Generally people use it and you'd never be able to tell. There is the errant idiot who will stay up for a week and a half and be nuts and erratic(i was in close quarters with such for a while... no bueno) but that is not relevant to your situation. even adderall has a slight toxicity, and they put kids on it and many stay on it for most of thier lives. I'm one of those and i'm here writing to you, coherently and with thought. I also used meth when i lived down south in asheville, and im fine. your fine. but i again urge you to seek out a good therapist and psychiatriast. The trauma you endured is causing a lot of distress in you, but i do believe the residual symptoms you describe are the product of your own mind. our minds are very powerful, and we are definitelty not aware of all that goes on up there. If you dont believe me, look up cases of split brain patients who'v had thier corpus callosum cut to alleviate epilepsy. half the brain has a mind of it's own. This same type of auto response from the depths of the brain can definitely cause very physical symptoms. I know it's hard to believe, but your mind can raise your blood pressure, cause pain, cause just about anything. You don't want this trauma to instill a deep groove in you that changes the way you think and/or makes you far more susceptible to somatic symptoms. There's absolutely no shame in seeking mental care. i do, most peolple i know do. And i really think you should, because the meth isn't effecting you anymore, and it didn't damage you. It doesn't work like that. but your quite upset, which is totally natural and reasonable given the situation, but that upset is turning physical and manifesting as somatic symptons. Thats gonna make life harder if it continues. there are people that can help. pls find them, psychaitrists and therapists. they can help you move past this and and change the obsessive thoughts your having. good luck man, you were seriously wronged, but you can rise above it and continue your life. I wish you the best
Im very happy my experience could help you in some way.
Think about this for a moment. People do lots of meth, some people use occasionally, some chronically, but if it caused all of the things that your scared of and all the symptoms your feeling, do you really think people would want to do it? If doing meth could just destroy you, think about all the people who use it often, theyd be dead, or at least maimed after a week of use, but people use for years with no issue. It is mildly neurotoxic, yes, but not with 1 use, and remember, you have 100 billion neurons. If you lost 10 you would never ever know the difference, but you probably weren't effected by it with a single dose. And again, if it was that neurotoxic, long term users would be brain dead, and thier not.
I'm guessing you were exposed to a lot of the governments propaganda/smear campain about meth. yes, those disheveled toothless people exist, but it is far from the normal user, they did A LOT of meth for a long tiime, and your not about to transform into one of them. i promise. Generally people use it and you'd never be able to tell. There is the errant idiot who will stay up for a week and a half and be nuts and erratic(i was in close quarters with such for a while... no bueno) but that is not relevant to your situation. even adderall has a slight toxicity, and they put kids on it and many stay on it for most of thier lives. I'm one of those and i'm here writing to you, coherently and with thought. I also used meth when i lived down south in asheville, and im fine. your fine. but i again urge you to seek out a good therapist and psychiatriast. The trauma you endured is causing a lot of distress in you, but i do believe the residual symptoms you describe are the product of your own mind. our minds are very powerful, and we are definitelty not aware of all that goes on up there. If you dont believe me, look up cases of split brain patients who'v had thier corpus callosum cut to alleviate epilepsy. half the brain has a mind of it's own. This same type of auto response from the depths of the brain can definitely cause very physical symptoms. I know it's hard to believe, but your mind can raise your blood pressure, cause pain, cause just about anything. You don't want this trauma to instill a deep groove in you that changes the way you think and/or makes you far more susceptible to somatic symptoms. There's absolutely no shame in seeking mental care. i do, most peolple i know do. And i really think you should, because the meth isn't effecting you anymore, and it didn't damage you. It doesn't work like that. but your quite upset, which is totally natural and reasonable given the situation, but that upset is turning physical and manifesting as somatic symptons. Thats gonna make life harder if it continues. there are people that can help. pls find them, psychaitrists and therapists. they can help you move past this and and change the obsessive thoughts your having. good luck man, you were seriously wronged, but you can rise above it and continue your life. I wish you the best