Hello. Again.
I am currently facing dealing with opiate withdrawals. As is generally the case with me, I don?t take ?that? much and have recently stabilized (I guess I have anyway - honestly I don?t know quite what that means anymore so if it?s tolerable I consider it stable) on 35 mgs of oxycodone a day. 10 in the morning, 10 in the afternoon and 15 in the evenings. I feel like shit, but it?s been years since I?ve felt ?good? so that?s normal. Each day is a struggle, but that?s normal for me, too.
Stabilizing at any lower of a dose isn?t going to work for me - I need to rip off the fucking bandaid. I?ve never been good at tapering and I?m shocked I?ve made it down this far. I?m hoping it will reduce the acute symptoms at least a bit. So, I?ll take my 15 mgs in about 5 hours and then that?s that. I know how to beat this. It?s simple (never easy, but simple) - just don?t take opiates and eventually you will feel like you can live. And then, if you are lucky, you may even want to live.
I?ve got clonodine and Kratom to help. I?m good at using the kratom to survive and not going crazy. I hate it too much to go crazy on it. I?ve done this before - this will be my fourth time of saying I?m never doing this again. But, I?m gonna say it, cause right now it?s true. This will be my last day 1.
This forum has gotten me through some dark times in the past. So, I?m back. I hope everyone else is doing as well as can be and not giving up the fight. I hear that?s the most important thing. Don?t quit quitting.
- VE
I am currently facing dealing with opiate withdrawals. As is generally the case with me, I don?t take ?that? much and have recently stabilized (I guess I have anyway - honestly I don?t know quite what that means anymore so if it?s tolerable I consider it stable) on 35 mgs of oxycodone a day. 10 in the morning, 10 in the afternoon and 15 in the evenings. I feel like shit, but it?s been years since I?ve felt ?good? so that?s normal. Each day is a struggle, but that?s normal for me, too.
Stabilizing at any lower of a dose isn?t going to work for me - I need to rip off the fucking bandaid. I?ve never been good at tapering and I?m shocked I?ve made it down this far. I?m hoping it will reduce the acute symptoms at least a bit. So, I?ll take my 15 mgs in about 5 hours and then that?s that. I know how to beat this. It?s simple (never easy, but simple) - just don?t take opiates and eventually you will feel like you can live. And then, if you are lucky, you may even want to live.
I?ve got clonodine and Kratom to help. I?m good at using the kratom to survive and not going crazy. I hate it too much to go crazy on it. I?ve done this before - this will be my fourth time of saying I?m never doing this again. But, I?m gonna say it, cause right now it?s true. This will be my last day 1.
This forum has gotten me through some dark times in the past. So, I?m back. I hope everyone else is doing as well as can be and not giving up the fight. I hear that?s the most important thing. Don?t quit quitting.
- VE