aloneinthevoid
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 21, 2019
- Messages
- 9
So i've been dating this girl for 7 months. She's great, I really enjoy being with her and honestly I don't want to move on. I've never really had a problem not lying before, this is my first real shot at an actual relationship so clearly I'm screwing up in some aspects, but I never thought it would be in the honesty department. My story starts at the fact that I LOVE smoking pot. She didn't really like that but she's cool and tolerated it for a while, but then I got in some legal trouble and had to stop for a while. I was hooked on the shit though, So when I was supposed to have stopped I would slip every here and there and smoke, but I would hide it from her knowing she would get mad and start distrusting me. Lo and behold it came off as me lying to her and all this stuff and it eventually led to the ultimatum, quit smoking and drinking or we're done. I love this girl a lot, I have no problem doing that for us. Whatever, I can sober up. I've been 99% sober since I agreed to be (with the exception of 1 beer that I drank to myself after I agreed to stop) I haven't touched anything. but there was a period of time before we started having all these trust issues where I went to Memphis,TN to record an album with a band I was jamming with and I told her I wasn't going to smoke but I totally did (I hadn't yet agreed to be completely sober) and she asked me last night If I did and I totally lied about it. I know the right thing should be to have told her the truth but I couldn't get myself to do it and risk that confrontation and possible argument and creating more trust issues. There's a super small chance she'll actually find out the truth but I just want to know can I be in a relationship with this little secret of mine and continue going on being happy? I'm genuinely stopping everything and not creating anymore tension for us, but is it possible to take this to my grave? I just need some assurance that it's possible for things to play out and not totally collapse on me...