• H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

Detox Finally stopped the methadone clinic

Debbie Combs

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 10, 2018
Messages
158
My last dose was 1/3/19 at 10:30am. It was 9 mg. I have been going to methadone clinic since 9/12, over 6 yrs. I was tapering, doing well, But took a Xanax one night for sleep and pissed dirty. They took my take homes away. That?s fine. I understand. It?s a rule. However I never had a dirty screen for the 6 yrs I was there. This was the first. I talked to Dr about recovery and his reply bothered me to no end. Clinic treats addiction, not recovery. So I asked my GP, he said that would be the clinic that would help with recovery. Vicious cycle. I jumped.Done pretty good for the last 2 days. My pupils are quite dilated. My heartbeat is really fast and my legs ache really bad. No appetite. I hope it does not get any worse. I live by myself. I?m older, 56. The heart beating so fast has me concerned. I?ve told my two daughters, they are supportive and live a short distance from here. I do feel alone. I have Xanax if I need it. 1 7.5 loritabs and have bought a supply of Lope. I do not want to use anything that would prolong. I gotta be top dollar in March. Thank you for reading this. I?m going to use this as my journal until I get better.Question......will it get worse? I?m having a hard time finding things I can get into to occupy my brain, not dwell on it. My highest dose was 90 at methadone clinic. I came down to 60 pretty fast and then to 30, I?d say the last year has me from 30-9. Now none. Scary after all these years.
 
Don't be scared Debbie, we're here for you, you're not alone.

Congrats on jumping off. My friend Dale (SoCal424) came off Methadone last March. Search for his threads. I will see if I'm adept enough to link you to his Methadone journal, I'm sure it will help you.

You can pm me if you need a friend, I'm here.

Much love and support, you got this.

Love,
your friend,
Ash.
 
Day 3 1/6/19
last night was rough. Hard to explain the pain in arms, legs and back. Movement helped. I took half of a Xanax to help with sleep. I do not want a benzo addiction to go along with it so I try to keep minimum. Stomach is tender.
The journal of Dale was so inspirational. Thank you for sharing. Took me the night to read it, but it gave hope. I had thoughts that being older I would not ever feel right again. Even feeling miserable I felt a peace I haven’t felt in awhile. Maybe cause I’m trying to better myself. IDK.......I’m going to shoot for 2 months. Really, really hoping I can be OK in March.
i have a Dr appt on Tuesday. Maybe Dr give some Gab for arms and legs.
I need to go back to clinic for refund. I had paid for the next two weeks. I did not tell them I wasn’t coming back. I’m almost willing to let them have the money.
hoping today will be a good day! It’s not raining. Seems it’s rained for the past 5 months. Need to do something to get mind off of med. hard when you feel like you weigh a ton. But just sitting, lying around is like a hell in its own. No contact with people is bothersome too. Glad I can write here.
 
Last edited:
Ask your doctor for Lyrica it's the stronger version of gabapentin. Don't be afraid of the benzos it takes 3-4 weeks of daily use to become dependent. Your going to need heavy comfort meds for the next 2 weeks at least.
 
Day 3 2:50 pm
76 hrs since last dose
stomach starting to feel bad. Nausea. Hard to move around. Have a headache too. Joint ache is bad but not as bad as last night. Have no desire to eat. Pulse routinely 85-95...... just yuck. Tried washing windows. Got 3 rooms done. No one but me and pup. Dogs are good company. He will need walking before it gets dark.
The pulse rate scares me. Feel like I been running or something.
ill ask Dr about Lyrica. Thank you for the advice. Any advice is welcomed and MUCH appreciated.
Who would’ve thought it would get bad at 9mg?
Crying at the drop of a hat. My parents are older, I usually stay down there thru weekends. Told them I had the flu. Do not really think they would understand. So, there is that guilt too.
 
9mg is still a big dose. You really should of gone all the way down to 1mg. If you still can go back to the clinic and do that I would recommend it. It's going to get worse unfortunately. At 72 hours you still have methadone in your system.
 
I can feel it getting worse. The RSL IS UNBEARABLE. Like cutting them off would be a relief. I do not want o go back. Yes, the clinic would be a option but I can not drive there daily and work. They took my take homes away. Plus last time they did it took 3 mo to get them back. I hate this clinic. I hate this feeling. I’m not in a good place right now. Thank you for the advice. I hope I can get a few hours of sleep.
 
Day4

Today is much the same of day 3. Body ache is up a tad, stomach is not right, no appetite. The ache in legs is almost unbearable, at night it goes into arms and back. I?m cold, I?m cold all the time wearing layers and under blankets. I should be going to work but I do not feel that is a good idea.
i know that I probably still have methadone in my body on day 4. I do not look forward to the rest of the week.
we have a cruise booked for March 3. It?s a family thing. If I went back to clinic I would not get take homes for those 8 days. They are slow in restoring take homes, plus working it?s really hard to go everyday.
The cruise is important. I want to feel good. I want to be sober. I have not been sober around my family for over 30 yrs. my parents are older, dad is not in good health, mom has dementia, I want them to see me like I really am. The longer I wait, the less opportunity I have of that.
SoCal said so much that inspired me.........that one day, I can have a genuine smile, that things will become beautiful again, real and I WILL feel normal. I was worried that at my age that would never happen. Methadone makes me feel like I have a cap over my eyes. I gotta get away from it. Going back is not an option.
 
Good job Debbie.

I am happy you are powering through and that you have read through Dale's journal. Glad it's helping you.


Take care,
you got this!!!

your friend,
Ash.

Today is much the same of day 3. Body ache is up a tad, stomach is not right, no appetite. The ache in legs is almost unbearable, at night it goes into arms and back. I?m cold, I?m cold all the time wearing layers and under blankets. I should be going to work but I do not feel that is a good idea.
i know that I probably still have methadone in my body on day 4. I do not look forward to the rest of the week.
we have a cruise booked for March 3. It?s a family thing. If I went back to clinic I would not get take homes for those 8 days. They are slow in restoring take homes, plus working it?s really hard to go everyday.
The cruise is important. I want to feel good. I want to be sober. I have not been sober around my family for over 30 yrs. my parents are older, dad is not in good health, mom has dementia, I want them to see me like I really am. The longer I wait, the less opportunity I have of that.
SoCal said so much that inspired me.........that one day, I can have a genuine smile, that things will become beautiful again, real and I WILL feel normal. I was worried that at my age that would never happen. Methadone makes me feel like I have a cap over my eyes. I gotta get away from it. Going back is not an option.
 
I understand. Ok getting through this. You need the following. Loperamide up to 10mg a day. It will help with every physical symptom. Some kind of benzo for getting through the nights. Kratom would be clutch especially if you plan on going to work anytime in the next month. Weed couldn't hurt. Clonidine for your heart rate and some of the physical ferlings. gabapentin or Lyrica both are very effective in high doses.



Suboxone isn't a bad idea if worse comes to worse. They will give you monthly scripts and you can taper off at your own pace
 
Thank you both much for the replies.
you said “OK, I understand”. ....,,,now I’m a snot bubble. Maybe a Xanax for these crying jags would help.
I will try to get the above stuffs. Hard when you feel sick. Loperamide I have, as the benzo. I do not want to draw this out. If taking loperamide will push it back I can’t.
I have gotten the rest of this week off. Hoping by the following week most of the hard withdrawls be over. Hoping. Karatom? I had some years and years ago, couldn’t not get that nasty powder down. Have they changed it any in the past 10 yrs?
 
Still day 4 but will have to say the heavy ache seems to be gone at the moment. It’s been like this for the past hour. I so hope it stays this way. I still have on heavy sweatshirt and a big hoodie, but I’m not aching. My stomach though..........my belly is water. Hard to handle the body aches constant for days. It’s nice to have a break.
Have taken 1/2 Xanax about every six hours.( orange one, think it’s a .5 ) then I take 3 Advil every 4 hrs. It helps tremendously.————————.

It it did not last. Not at all. 3am legs are bad. Why the legs? Seems a lot of people complain about RLS through withdrawls. Stomach is gonna explode. Breathing seems a little harder, can’t catch breath good. This is my 114 hr of no methadone. I hope I’m a regular person and this is when methadone finally leaves my system. Looking at 2 more days of harshness and hopefully it’ll decrease or maintain the crap for a bit. Just hope for no increase in pain. I had three children all totally natural, no epidural, no nothing and it was easier than this. Nights are the worst.
 
Last edited:
Day 5....... hardest night yet. No sleep. Had weird painful jerking reactions in lower back, made sleep impossible. Nothing helped. Saw my GP today, nope no more benzo, he said it was addictive and I do not need it. So, I’m guessing I’ll be going through multiple things. He gave me trazodone, clonidine, told me to pick up immodium and Dramamine and come back next week. Why I got discouraged with my Xanax script....... was keeping me sane. Feel crummy but those jerky feeling are gone for now. Hot bath did not help them.
CJ—- you were right, was hoping to prove wrong. It did get worse. How long will these horrible things last?
It seems it comes in waves. Like I’ll be OK, not great but manageable then bam, stomach, or the legs or back or shoulders. Electric shock going from back through legs. So freaking weird.
no want of methadone however. I can see at this point taking another opiate. I actually have 1 loritab. I do not think it would do much, but it is sitting there.
Thanks to all that read. I’m grumbling, but it’s better than being tied to a methadone clinic. I know I’ll see sunshine again one day. Temporary. I need to focus on future not the present.
 
One last question....... the Xanax. I still have some. Should I continue or try to stop those as well? Will the trazodone take its place? I have 20 Xanax left give or take. Should I wait till worst is over with methadone or conqueror it all?
 
Hi Debbie,

You're doing really well, you can pm me if you ever want to as well.

I am a chronic pain patient, but I came off my pain medication voluntarily twice because of all the stigma and hastle and stress I was enduring due to this so called opate crisis.

I ct'd off both times with no comfort meds, so if it were me I would take what I had to help me get through and then worry about that later.


Hopefully cj can offer his advice.

Hang in there, I'm here for you.

your friend,
Ash.
One last question....... the Xanax. I still have some. Should I continue or try to stop those as well? Will the trazodone take its place? I have 20 Xanax left give or take. Should I wait till worst is over with methadone or conqueror it all?
 
I think my post left. I wrote it. Lol
I did not tell my GP I had Xanax left. I was just wanting a refill basically. Of course I told him all about the methadone withdrawal before I as for refill.
But question......can Xanax be taken with trazadone? At night for some much needed sleep
sorry about the stress and stigma that true pain patients go through, I’ve heard it’s bad. I know they have decided to go thru yet another plan effective in June of this year.
 
Last edited:
My pleasure.

If you want to pm me, you click on my username, it will take you to my profile and it will say private message epl1. Click it.

I think cj would be the right guy to advise you on the med questions.

I get you about being sick of the system, it's honestly exhausting and very disheartening.

Hang in there honey.

your friend,
Ash.

Thank you Ash for the quick response. It’s nice to have someone that’s been there to talk to.
I do not know how to PM.......I not good at internet.��
will the trazadone and Xanax be too much at night? I hate that my Dr knows all about my addiction. I laid it all out there this morning. Felt vulnerable. Guess I knew the Xanax would be gone if I told him, but tired of the whole game, system of Drs.
 
Yes Xanax can be taken with all the drugs mentioned in this thread. Your doctor is a complete asshole I would fire him after this. This is just getting started your going to be like this for between 20 and 30 days. Days 7-14 will be the worst as the lack of sleep will make all the symptoms worse. I'm really sorry to be the bearer of bad news like this. What Socal did is pretty fucking unheard of and frankly he probably downplayed the hell he went through significantly. Withdrawal is different for everyone. But you've been on opiates an extremely long time which is going to make your withdrawal harder and longer. I'm not trying to discourage but I just get the feeling you think your almost through with this and well your not even close. The worst probably hasn't even started.

You need to make a decision. Eigther commit to riding this out or call a Suboxone doctor. If your going to ride it out you need more meds. Kratom still tastes nasty but mixing it with chocolate pudding or putting it in gel caps you can buy at GNC and other health stores makes it do able. Loperamide won't prolong the withdrawal it just might make it survivable. 10mg isn't a huge dose the hope is to stop the diaheria and stomach discomfort and slightly reduce some of the muscle pain. 800mg of advil every 8 hours if your kidneys are healthy. In top of 2000mg Tylenol every 12 hours if your liver is healthy will help muscle pain a tiny bit. The Clonidine is good im not going to advise you on a dose but I will say I exceeded the recommended amount and got a little relief. Call the doctor back and ask him to call in a muscle relaxer. If you have insurance call an addiction doctor and explain the predicament your in and beg for help. Your in a dangerous situation mentally and possibly even physically. Dehydration has killed people in severe withdrawal. If your not able to hold down fluids go to the ER. If you start contemplating suicide go to the ER. Pick an ER with a detox unit.

God I feel for you. I wouldn't wish methadone withdrawal on my worst enemy. Especially since you didn't taper all the way to zero.
 
Well that scared the bejesus outta me. I’m not naive to think I’m anywhere close to withdrawls being over. I’m sure after all these years methadone has stacked in my system. Hoping that it wouldn’t be longer than 14 days, hard core withdrawls..5-7 being the hardest.
My option is to ride it out with the RX doc has given me. Will try tonight. If it’s too hard I’ll call 911, go into detox. If that electric thing goes into my back down into legs stays for days it would probably do me in. The jerking was bad. Thank you for the concern. I’ll keep it in mind. Appreciate all info!
 
Top