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Detox Finally stopped the methadone clinic

What a dick. Sorry your not getting any in real life support. Unfortunatly many doctors are willfully ignorant to the reality of what your going through. I had one say it was just like "a case of the flu". That's so far from reality I'm not even sure who thought it up. It's more like having your linbs torn off one by one over and over while someone is stabbing you in the lower spine. Right after the death of a beloved family member. But I digress. Load up on the Clonidine and other meds and try to ride it out I guess. Bot much else to do.
 
What a wonderful analogy.........torn limb from limb after the death of a loved one............it is what it is! And yes, almost verbatim, it’s like the flu.
Are there any doctors out there that help with detox? I’d love to find one. My luck by the time I find one, it’ll be done.
 
There are addiction specialists but I've never actually been to one so I don't know. I do know that other people have gotten more help then your doc is giving you.
 
Did anyone else have a hard time getting on here? It keeps sending me to a blue LED light page.
Quick post see if it works
it worked.
Day 13. Headache, yucky knees, 3 hours sleep. Trying to avoid caffeine, so got decaf coffee. Forgot and had NO caffeine all day, gave me an incredible headache.
I did go back to work. I’m glad I did. Had to push the last 2 hrs though. Tired, but I work with some good people. They told me my eyes looked bad. Told them they felt bad. They were very RED! Laughed a lot, I needed that. Things got way serious for over a week. I hope sleep comes tonight. I really need a good nights sleep.
 
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Debbie: Were you able to get any sleep last night? Also, how was going back to work today? Keep pushing forward--You've almost made it to Day 14--you are a warrior! I would say that you are on the downward side of the worst of the physical stuff so maybe you can make it without any doctor/med support? Although, I will say that getting something to help with the insomnia will go a long way to help, I think. When I was going CT, a lot of people suggested sleep meds but I was trying to make it thru without them. In retrospect, I think sleep would have helped speed the recovery even if it were drug induced. ....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... For what it is worth, I'll also mention that I tried some natural sleep meds. Melatonin and Valerian Root made me very tired, but didn't put me to sleep and made me feel zombified the next day. However, 5-HTP, GABA, and L-Theanine did actually help me get some sleep. The GABA did seem to increase my heart rate a bit so I stopped taking it. I also tried L-Tyrosine and Phosphatidyl Serine during the day since they are supposed to help aid in the production of dopamine--I'm not sure they really did anything since I was starting to feel better anyway when I started them. I finally just went to a sleep specialist and she prescribed a bunch of heavy duty sleep meds. Of everything she threw at me, I will say that Trazadone was probably the best and actually gave me a decent night's sleep without feeling foggy the next day. I would take it for 2-3 nights in a row and then wait 5-6 days then take it again because I was afraid of getting hooked on it even though it is not supposed to be addictive. ........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... And, I agree: whoever said WD is like the flu either has never been through a hard WD or they have never had the flu. While one can usually use that as a good excuse to tell friends/family, the only similarity with the flu might be the gastro issues/congestion, IMO. Other than that, I'm not sure there is any known affliction withdrawal can be compared to (except withdrawal...). It is a physical, psychological, emotional assault that is hard to describe any way other than a "living hell". Although, CJ's description is actually pretty spot on.
 
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Hey Gollum, trazadone is a very weird drug for me. I tried a whole pill on night 5. I woke day 6 and it felt someone had beat me up and I could barely move. I get confused, throwing these “new” drugs on me, while in throes of intense withdrawal. I didn’t know if it was the new drug or if it was the withdrawal causing so much misery. I take 1/2 now, but it doesn’t help much with sleep. Kinda scared to take the whole thing because of the grogginess. But see....... it could’ve been that particular day....
 
Debbie: Guess we were posting at time same time! Yeah, I think BL is having some server/update issues: hard to get on and it is removing all spaces from text blocks.Good to hear that returning to work was good--laughing a lot is a really good sign. And, I had to cave with the caffeine when I was in WD. I tried going without but I was used to drinking about 32 oz through the day. I got down to about 8 oz of very weak coffee before 9:00 am which helped the headache but I don't think made sleep any worse than it already was. I decided that I still needed to function and dealing with a caffeine headache on top of everything else was just too much. It did help me to concentrate a bit as well.Hang in there you are doing great.
 
I never took the Trazadone during WD--I was probably a month past it. I don't remember any bad side effects like you describe, but I do remember the first few nights it did not do anything, then it really kicked in hard. Put me out for like 12 hours straight and was the longest I had slept continuously for probably a decade.
 
Trazadone makes me feel shitty the next day but if it puts you to sleep roll with it. Sorry I was probably a little too definitive on the no caffeine speech. I didn't really consider the addiction angle. I don't drink much of the stuff myself. Props for getting through work! Your a fucking soldier! I'll be real I'm a little bitch when it comes to withdrawal. Shit just breaks my will quick
 
Day 14
i made it to day 14. I got some sleep. It was broken, 11-2 and then 4-7, but I will take it!
had RSL again for the two hours, not intense but just the drawing up of muscles, tingling. I did get up. Walked around, let the dog out. Took ibuprofen, cleaned up the house a bit, then went back to bed. I am thankful for going back to sleep. That extra 3 hrs, makes such a big difference.
Gonna try no Imodium today. Stomach has finally settled a bit. Still not much appetite.
Headache, well, I’m drinking coffee. I made it half decaf half regular.
Think it helps if you tell someone what you are doing. Helps with accountability. Told a few for support, to give a “check on” last week. I do believe they already knew I had been doing something all those years. How can we really hide it from people who care? Doing 90mg of methadone and 1 mg of Xanax they HAD to of known. BUT I thought I was hiding it. I told no one of going to a methadone clinic not even my husband. Made it harder that clinic was in my delivery zone. Convienant for me as far as pick up but not for antonamy. My customers lived in the area, my carriers delivered there. I was ashamed of going to clinic. Very.
Work was good. Great to return to normalcy. Was super anxious though, even thought of retiring and not going back. Everyone kept asking me if I was OK. My eyes were so red, watery, weak. Nothing I did helped it. Make up accented it. Lol they look they same today.
I appreciate all the advise and comments. It really helps to have a journal. I do not know if mine would help anyone, I was so confused through the worst of it.
 
Thank you CJ, you have been very important through this detox. I don’t think I would’ve continued without your help. I really don’t. The list of comfort meds, the advise.......sincerely thank you.
So much in fact, I think others should know just how good this forum is for detoxing. It’s real life advise. You can’t find anywhere else. It’s a life saver.
 
Last question CJ........I just read about clonidine. What? It’s addictive? I’ve taken for a week. Don’t think I’m addicted quite yet but it does lower BP. Really not wanting to pay a Dr for advice. can I just stop this? Why would anyone want to abuse it?
Or trazadone? Both are addictive. Crap! Here I was thinking I was getting unchained to be chained by another substance.
 
Clonidine isn't addictive at all. It's primary use is as a blood pressure medication. Sure you didn't mix up kolonopin with Clonidine?

The only downside to abruptly stopping it I found on Google was it could cause rebound high blood pressure. But those cases where after long term use. I took Clonidine for a month straight with zero issues. You could always call the pharmacy you got it filled and ask the pharmacist. But I'm pretty sure it's not addicting in the slightest
 
Day 15
RSL and no sleep. This is going to be a long haul. 11-2am and 6:30-8am. I got sleep it comes in dashes.
Last night at work, I got an incredible boost of energy. It’s almost like I took a couple rails. Nervous energy.
Management in all their glory decided that my doctors excuse was not good enough. Took 2 days for them to decide this. They need, lol, a descriptive reason I was out for over a week. It’s none of their business. It’s a privacy law, they are stepping over the line. My doctor deemed it necessary for me to miss and released me to work on this date. Signed. Frustrated me to no end. Pissed!
So, as is, I have anxiety that rules. What do you do when something like that happens? They are trying for dismissal
Besides that, was a great night at work. Amazing how talking is a pleasure, moving around doesn’t suck, don’t have a fall off after 6 hrs. If I could just sleep better.
Is there an “average” when sleep becomes normal?
 
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Unfortunately insomnia is the thing that lingers longest. But you should start getting some sleep once the rls ends. So day 20-25. You where on a lowish dose so hopefully PAWS are light.

That's so.e bullshit about your job. Call an employment lawyer
 
I need sleep. I need 4 or 5 hrs. Of sleep really bad. Joints are bad today, weather has changed. Hard without sleep, so I heard someone on here say something about Kratom. I’m gonna go to local head shop here in a bit. I’m hoping it will help. Any advice? Anyone?
 
Kratom is basically a weak opiate. It's a little more complicated then that pharmacologically but for your purpose it would be like taking codiene. It will definitely make you feel better. It will help you sleep. The trade off is it may prolong this mess.

One popular strategy is to start taking kratom everyday then gradually taper off of it. But your so close to the end of this I think that would be silly unless your Just to the point where your going to take some kind of opiate no matter what.

So take it tonight get some sleep recharge. We can talk about the way forward tommorow.
 
Thank you CJ, you really are a great guy to help, geez someone you don’t even know. I think I was a little agitated with the pain. Maybe it’s the weather, IDK. I know I hurt pretty bad today in joints, ecspecially knees and back. If I remember, it’s one of the reasons I started taking opiates in the first place.
Trying to work, thought if I pushed it would get better, it did not. It was bad. It’s better now I’m home and got a hot bath. Not great, better.
pain was kinda making me catch my breath. Don’t mean to be a wimp. Guess I’ll ride this out. What choice?
Trying to remember when I went down rabbit hole with opiates.
Maybe 1995? It’s been awhile. Don’t even know how my body is suppose to feel. That’s not good. It’s been too long.
i do know that earlier, I was close to taking something/anything for the pain. Hope sleep comes tonight, something like 4-5 hrs. I gotta another job in the morning. Thank you if you read this. I’m sorry it sounds so whinny.
 
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