Mental Health Fugue state?

[EggrollThunder]

So from my recollection, about a week ago my and my girlfriend were about to go to sleep. I stepped outside to smoke a bowl. I'm a basic stoner, used to be deep into pills and eventually graduated (more like dropped out) to heroin. I've since cleaned up but I still smoke weed pretty often. This night I walked back inside, put my pipe away.

Then everything went white.

I couldn't remember my name, where I was, why I was there, who my gf was. Nothing.
I felt like the house was filled with puzzles. I was terrified to open the front door, I flipped every light switch I could find multiple times trying to solve whatever puzzle I thought I was in. She thought I was fucking with her and got mad. I eventually went out back to smoke a cigarette.
A family member came outside around the same time.
I dont know how else to describe it, but how people use word association to remember someone's name, like they'll see a lamp, the lamp is red, McDonalds fries have a red box, McDonalds is fast food, Wendy's is fast food. Her name is Wendy
It was like that except backwards. I needed help remembering everything again. After about half an hour of this I went back inside to my girlfriend who asked me if I knew who she was. I finally did. Kind of...
Then I blacked out.
I remember taking my phone, her phone, both of our laptops, my cousins phone, and my tablet, and I was scared someone would take them from me?
My gf says this happened before, sometime last year. Same story, same plot. I guess I told her I had a big plan of making 5 million dollars, typing in random numbers on each device. I guess I explained to her I was getting 1500 poker chips in 15 transactions to equal 5 million dollars, and I had a whole plan of laundering money and deep web deals and all this stuff I dont recall. She said I eventually started crying because I thought I was successful.
Anyways, next thing I know I'm waking up, shes talking to me but I think shes asking me riddles.
Every cup laid around the house I assumed is strategically placed. Shes asking me questions, and for some reason I honestly thought that as soon as I remembered details from the night before I'd realize I was in an orange jumpsuit in prison. (I swear I read something like this somewhere before?)
I knew I was confused, and I didnt trust anyone.
I kept asking if I hurt anyone, and luckily I didnt. However I did end up hacking into my cousins phone and changing the password. Poor girl had to reset it because I couldn't remember what i changed it to.

Long story short. I'm pretty sure I'm slowly losing my mind.
My family has a strong history of bipolar disorder, I was diagnosed when I was 14, and when I was 15 I was diagnosed with Chronic Insomnia, BPD as well as depression and a few other things. Because of that however.l, I'm terrified of being hospitalized. (especially after being involuntarily admitted after a suicide attempt.) so I've kept away from medications and eventually stopped the dr visits all together.
I'm going to see someone after the new years because this legitimately scared me, and everyone involved.
My gf asked my mother about this happening in the past and she said it had happened at least 6-7 times throughout my teens. I dont recall any.
I'm not sure what to make of this, and I know I need to get checked out. I'm just not sure how to go about it I guess.
Do I tell whoever I see about all this happening? I dont want to be labeled crazy or admitted to a psych ward or anything.
How do I go about this?
Any tips or advice would be fuckin spiffy

 

[Eleusis]

As a disclaimer: I don't have any professional experience, nor do I have any in-depth knowledge about mental health disorders.

That being said, I have a friend who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder who experienced many of the same symptoms you describe. I don't think there's much co-morbidity with the other diagnoses you received at the age of 15. You describe what sound like clear cut manic/depressive episodes, namely that scheme where you saw yourself making 5 million dollars, which is a sounds like a grandiose plan typical of a manic episode. In addition you've also expressed that you've also had periods of depression in your youth. Given the symptoms and your family history of Bipolar disorder, I'd strongly advise you to go to see a consultant psychiatrist.

The fear of being labeled crazy is pretty understandable nowadays; it's something that had previously prevented myself and friends from seeking help for our various mental health issues. At the end of the day, I believe you should be more concerned about treating any issues you may have for your sake, rather than focus in on the stigma that mental health carries. You seem to have a good support network around you (your mom, girlfriend and potentially others), who I'm sure will be understanding and supportive. If you seek help of your own volition, there is no chance you would be carted off to a psych ward, I guarantee it. Mood stabilizers and anti-psychotics drastically improved my friend's life when he went and got help. Talk to your mom or girlfriend about going with you to see a consultant psychiatrist somewhere.

I hope all goes well with you in the meantime man, I'd just advise you to get help, and get some insight as to what is going on with you at the moment. If it is in fact Bipolar Disorder that you're diagnosed with, you'll be able to receive the proper treatment for it. Also I'd suggest to also reign in any use of substances (weed or otherwise), as they can exacerbate any mental health issues you might have.

I wish you all the best and I hope everything goes alright. Stay safe, man.

 

[Ain'tLifeGrand]

You also need a thorough physical workup. With the history, yes this is likely psychiatric but any potential physical cause needs ruled out such as seizure disorders which can cause odd symptoms.

 

[Eleusis]

You also need a thorough physical workup. With the history, yes this is likely psychiatric but any potential physical cause needs ruled out such as seizure disorders which can cause odd symptoms.

This is a really good point that I didn't think of at all.

I totally agree, you should go through a battery of tests and rule out physiological/neurological causes for the behaviour, before seeking out psychiatric help outright. Alternatively you could discuss possible physiological/neurological problems with the psychiatrist, though a psychiatrist would be inclined to view symptoms from a purely psychiatric perspective, so there's a danger of physical causes being overlooked that way.

If you have the money and the means, and if you're not in need of urgent psychiatric intervention, then get a thorough physical workup like Ain'tLifeGrand said.