The November Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread v. The Great Thanksgiving Turkey Drop

[aihfl]

Unfortunately, they left out the best line - "As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly!"

 

[Pucman]

Halloween was a fun sober time for me. I still have mad cravings when I go out but doing more family stuff really helps. I still don’t feel like I’m out of the addiction and will never be. I have faith this month will be better. Look forward to helping others when I can.

 

[aihfl]

Agreed. I went to a Halloween party yesterday (my first party in a long time) and learned that 1. I can have a good time not blasted out of my mind, and 2. most people don't get completely wasted. Anyone get my costume?

 

[ladyhlove]

^^Of course. I also commented on this when on my thread. That's an amazing costume, LOVE it!!

I did October completely dope free and November should, hopefully, follow suite.

The holidays are my least favorite time of year. My family stresses me out (like many others here, I'm sure). I love them and normally I don't mind my family, they (esp my mother) just seem to get all worked up on the holidays and try to have, idk, like the "perfect" xmas or thanksgiving or whatever and when they dont (bc that doesn't exist) they get all upset. I always used extra hard during the holidays, xmas in particular, so this year will be different for sure,

I hope everyone has a good month!

 

[jasperkent]

Ahhh, November! The leaves are beautiful and the weather is crisp. I love it. Also love Thanksgiving. (not a big Xmas fan)

I, too, used to stress out a lot during the holidays. Now my mom is my only living relative (except for a half-brother in Germany) so it's not so bad. It's more socially acceptable to drink too much around the holidays so that will be a trigger for me. On the other hand, I've never woke up in the morning wishing I'd gotten drunk the night before.

Hope everyone is well and reasonably happy.

Peace&Love,
jasper

"I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land." -- Jon Stewart

 

[ladyhlove]

DITTO jasper. Thanksgiving, not so much, but xmas for sure. I'm going down to visit my mom in south fl and she is the one who stresses me out the most (even though we're incredibly close..its only bad during the holidays i dont know why). Her husband, my step dad, is an alcoholic so there is always a lot of booze around and he likes to go out to bars and whatnot for dinner every night. I usually drink my face off but in the past its been bc I always had to go a few days without opiates back when I was on the pills. Luckily, last year they came to me so I didn't have to figure out a way to smuggle dope on the plane (going without was not an option at that point). I may find it a lot better this year being on methadone and feeling decent vs having to drink to mask my wds. Good luck to ya handling the alcohol thing. I know I've def been watching my intake lately for sure

A, I also meant to add this to my last post...I'm super proud of you for not drinking at the party! I know how tempting it can be in those kind of situations and I know you have anxiety issues and I wanna say KUDOS to you for going and still having a good time! I think you're making tremendous progress this go round :D

 

[Captain.Heroin]

Agreed. I went to a Halloween party yesterday (my first party in a long time) and learned that 1. I can have a good time not blasted out of my mind, and 2. most people don't get completely wasted. Anyone get my costume?

LOL @ kavanaugh costume

hilarious. Thanks for starting the thread.

 

[aihfl]

A, I also meant to add this to my last post...I'm super proud of you for not drinking at the party! I know how tempting it can be in those kind of situations and I know you have anxiety issues and I wanna say KUDOS to you for going and still having a good time! I think you're making tremendous progress this go round :D

Thank you for your kind encouragement, Lady. It's humbling to go to these parties now sober, and see that I was pretty much the only one that would get shitfaced. I've learned that an addict can never say never, but I hope that chapter is behind me.

Here's my "remorseful" Kavanaugh face:

 

[Captain.Heroin]

lmao omg there's a strong similarity like you could be a professional impersonator

get on the liberal comedy/talk shows they would pay you to dress up like that lmao :D

in all seriousness I am doing alright. Just relaxing for the most part. Trying to get through life.

 

[ladyhlove]

A, I hear you there. I remember taking a DUI class when I was much younger and the teacher claimed you were an alcoholic if you had more than 5 drinks in a week. I remember saying to him, "Well then everyone is an alcoholic! Everyone goes to parties and drinks WAY more than 5 beers!" and the teacher told me that, no, most people did NOT do that. I began paying attention..he was right! Most people had 3 or less, drank water and ate food, and left at a decent hour. It was just ME and my crew of like-minded hoodlums that were there taking shots and slamming beers till 5am.

I still have a night like that every 6 months or so, but it's rare now. That kind of life is an empty one.

I do firmly think that chapter is behind you, A, you've been killing it this go 'round and I feel like you're really starting to get into the routine of your new sober life and actually enjoying it! The madness feels good when it ends, doesn't it? And ya know what, if there turns out to be an extra shitty chapter in this book, that's ok too because I feel like each time we do this, we get stronger and better and ready to be even more successful the next go round. It's all a learning experience and I feel like you know that.

Kudos! Enjoy your thanksgiving! You going to your mothers? I know you and her have an interesting relationship..

 

[jasperkent]

It's true that when I sobered up I realized people didn't drink as much as I had thought they did. However, I always knew I was an alcoholic (since about age 16). I was the guy who drank before the party, drank the most at the party, was the last to pass out, and was the first one up drinking again in the morning. This on top of excessive use of various drugs. If I'd known I would live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself.

Peace&Love,
jasper


"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." -- Lily Tomlin

 

[aihfl]

Kudos! Enjoy your thanksgiving! You going to your mothers? I know you and her have an interesting relationship..

Thank you for the encouragement, Lady. I just stopped at my mother's on the way to my friend's wedding (flew to Nashville - had a few things to do there) and borrowed her car so I didn't have to bother with a rental and drove to Illinois, so I won't be going there for Thanksgiving. I don't have any firm plans yet, but I was thinking about having a small group of friends over in the evening after everyone's done with their family obligations, and getting one of those small, catered holiday meals from The Fresh Market. I can't do the AA Thanksgiving thing again. That was just too fucking depressing. It would be far less depressing to be at home with takeout Chinese and football or a movie on the TV, and perhaps going out in the kayak (I live on a lake) with Sonny now that he has a spiffy life preserver of his own.

Maybe you're on to something Captain. I must have been prescient hanging onto that masters graduation gown for over 20 years. Who knew it would once again see the light of day???

 

[Save]

It's true that when I sobered up I realized people didn't drink as much as I had thought they did. However, I always knew I was an alcoholic (since about age 16). I was the guy who drank before the party, drank the most at the party, was the last to pass out, and was the first one up drinking again in the morning. This on top of excessive use of various drugs. If I'd known I would live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself.

Peace&Love,
jasper


"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." -- Lily Tomlin

Some can drink and not experience negative effects. Studies are now showing even 1 drink per day isn't actually health benefiting.

Edit: So actually drinking is inherently negative for health according to new research. Some just don't take it as far as hardcore imbibers do and maintain their health in mind, body, and interpersonally thereof.

 

[Save]

Halloween was a fun sober time for me. I still have mad cravings when I go out but doing more family stuff really helps. I still don?t feel like I?m out of the addiction and will never be. I have faith this month will be better. Look forward to helping others when I can.

Getting "out" of the addiction will never happen. I mean we will always be wired to return to old ways once we have learned them. However we can change and become free from addiction and thoughts of using. Cravings may be caused by a need that is going unmet or perhaps not so much however they should reduce and diminish completely over time, a long time.

For me they have gone away but as you said we will never be out of the addiction. Hence a need to not forget where we came from so to speak and it helps to have a place in mind you want to get to to help stay focused.

I will admit I had to make some lifestyle changes many would find "extreme" to get to where I am now. I don't see anything wrong with them other than they kind of go against the stream that modern society is floating down without giving it a second thought apparently.

Details in the future in my journal.

I am still very much in a treacherous place however I feel quite stable in it which is good but I am still on a cliff of some kind metaphorically and must be cautious in all that I do.

 

[Jabberwocky]

For me they have gone away but as you said we will never be out of the addiction.

awesome!!! but yeah, very true. and one thing i have realised since coming into rehab and reading some recovery literature is that addiction is a set of behaviours as well. i have to fight the urge to manipulate and lie even though i'm now clean.

thought i'd say hello to this thread cos i am hoping to get through november clean. i'll be in rehab for most of it, so should be trivial? nope. i've had the most intense cravings i've had for a long time and am now on weekend release. on wednesday i felt that i'd just have cravings intermittently till i gave in and used. with that attitude i'd relapse in no time. using my newfound freedom to take positive, recovery oriented, action and having a lovely time because of it has revived my fighting spirit!

 

[jasperkent]

I've found that if I have a craving it will go away whether I use or not. So I choose not.

Peace&Love,
jasper




​"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?" -- Stephen Wright

 

[Jabberwocky]

you're right. i'm pretty sure that the only way never to have cravings is to use continuously.

 

[ladyhlove]

I have always found that the longer one steps away from their drug, though, the lesser and lesser the cravings and the farther apart they become.

 

[Jabberwocky]

that's what people keep promising me and i hope its true. i've no reason to doubt. 44 days clean and its still pretty strong when it comes.

 

[jasperkent]

It is true. I'm at 5 months and feeling waaaay better than I did at 44 days. I rarely even get true cravings. More like fleeting thoughts. They come, they go, it's really no big deal.

Peace&Love,
jasper



​"Do one thing every day that scares you." -- Eleanor Roosevelt