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October Getting/Staying Clean/Sober thread v. To All the Ghouls I've Loved Before

aihfl

aihfl

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Nov 5, 2015
Messages
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In the spirit of Halloween, I dedicate this to my ex-wife and last two girlfriends (and congratulations to those of you who have managed to avoid the ghouls).

 
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Stay safe guys!
 
Another night of shit sleep and wack dreams. I don't know how I'd deal with this without Adderall. Last night dreamed I got a "too good to be true" deal on a huge house in a suburb where a murder had taken place and bad and weird shit starts happening from the moment I take the keys. My own personal version of the George and Kathy Lutz story. I guess the takeaway is enjoy my humble little 2/2, which has good energy. And I don't ever anticipate remarrying, let alone having children at my age, so this is all the space my dog and I need. I also have to lay off the smokes. It's difficult to fall asleep with a dry tickle in your throat. But I'm way to stressed out ATM to cut back.
 
Love the video! Glad to be in October, September felt like it was lingering around. I'm looking forward to chilly outdoor activities this fall! Haunted hayride and ValleySCARE coming up this month.
 
This is the time of year where it's been so fucking hot for so fucking long that I forget it's autumn in other places. I imagine the AC will be running for a minimum of another month. Enjoy the cool weather and the Halloween activities. The closest we get here is Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Orlando which I would never dream of going at this point - too many drunk assholes (I used to be one of them) to be anything remotely scary.
 
aihfl said:
The closest we get here is Halloween Horror Nights at Universal Orlando which I would never dream of going at this point - too many drunk assholes (I used to be one of them) to be anything remotely scary.
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Sounds pretty scary to me! =D
 
I wish I could go around trick or treating like you guys do in the states but living in South Africa it is a no go. Dressing up like a ghost and walking in the streets after sunset??? Hahaha you would get fucking robbed then stabbed then raped and then killed.
 
JK25 said:
I wish I could go around trick or treating like you guys do in the states but living in South Africa it is a no go. Dressing up like a ghost and walking in the streets after sunset??? Hahaha you would get fucking robbed then stabbed then raped and then killed.
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You would have loved Devil's Night in Detroit back in the day. When all the firebugs would come out and play and torch entire city blocks.
 
JK25 said:
I wish I could go around trick or treating like you guys do in the states but living in South Africa it is a no go. Dressing up like a ghost and walking in the streets after sunset??? Hahaha you would get fucking robbed then stabbed then raped and then killed.
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Pls tell us how things were better back in the day

It will make me feel good

That’s sad though because halloweening is fun when you’re a youngin’
 
I did Sept. dope free. I'm gonna try to make Oct. the same! :)

The sugar cravings that methadone gives me makes me want to trick or treat for the first time in 20 years...but I'll probably just end up buying a bunch of candy for "trick or treaters" (my neighborhood has like..2) that I will end up devouring.
 
Lol A! Your post made me smile.

That sounds like one crazy dream- better bizarre than terrifying, right? Hope you're well my friend.

I'm still soldiering on. Doing my best to get better.

Fall is my favorite season. It's still warm in PA. My face got sunburn yesterday!! I was outside in the morning, from 9-11 or so. Now today, my face is tan and my foundation (makeup) doesn't match lol. Oy.

It will be cold by the end of this month. I really love the colors, smells, the feel ... of Fall. <3
 
Nice to see you around 10, and to hear that you're soldiering on. Me too, although I've been an anxiety ridden mess lately and my sleep hasn't improved. According to my sleep app, averaging under 6 hrs a night and most of it is spent in light sleep or REM sleep, so in other words, I'm getting no rest. And as much as I'd like to throw back some freezing cold Luksusowa (Polish potato vodka) I know I'll be fucked up for days if I do it, so I just somehow deal.

Envious of all you guys that are experiencing fall and the fun things that go with it (with the exception of the previously mentioned arson-related mischief in the Detroit of yore). One of the last years I was married my ex and I took a Halloween weekend trip to the Vermont house, and wouldn't you know, the biggest snowfall of the entire fucking season hit that weekend (I think about two feet). So much for apple picking and hayrides. Kids were out trick or treating in snowsuits. It's going to be hot for at least another month here, and the daily summer storms seemed to have turned off, so now it just feels really miserable.
 
Does anyone listen to the Dopey podcast? I love it. Ex addicts telling stories and talking about addiction and life. It’s great, been around a few years. Sadly the cohost just passed but it’s still a great listen.
 
ladyhlove said:
I did Sept. dope free. I'm gonna try to make Oct. the same! :)

The sugar cravings that methadone gives me makes me want to trick or treat for the first time in 20 years...but I'll probably just end up buying a bunch of candy for "trick or treaters" (my neighborhood has like..2) that I will end up devouring.
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I get the worst sweet cravings off opioids now. :| I never ate sweets like this when I was high all the time. Really weird. 8(
 
achemicalreaction said:
Does anyone listen to the Dopey podcast? I love it. Ex addicts telling stories and talking about addiction and life. It’s great, been around a few years. Sadly the cohost just passed but it’s still a great listen.
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I've listened to it here and there. It's refreshing how frank they are about drugs and recovery, but I think they stray too much into glorifying drug use sometimes. The last one I listened to was the episode with Matt Pinfield - was interesting to hear his story. Sorry to hear about Chris passing, I had no idea.
 
Glad October is here! It's still hot in Chattanooga, but towards end of the month it should cool off a bit. And I love Halloween-- it's my favorite holiday. This year should be better than last year. Last Halloween I got a public intoxication charge (it wasn't even dark yet) and since I was on probation for a DUI I had to spend 2 weeks in jail. Detoxing. Fun, fun.

I'm so glad to be clean&sober. Fewer things to worry about.

Hope everyone is well and reasonably happy.

Peace&Love,
jasper

​"On Halloween I ran out of candy and had to give the kids nicotine gum." -- David Letterman
 
Glad that you don't have to worry about such problems anymore J. Detoxing in jail is the worst. When I copped my DUI in Coffee Co., one of the regulars told me that they will not administer psych meds for the first 30 days you're there. I was only there 48 hours and that was bad enough. And as bad as alcohol withdrawal is, at least the worst of that is over in a few days. I couldn't imagine having a prolonged cold turkey detox off antidepressants and gabapentin had I had to stay.
 
Well.
Im coming up on 48 hrs with no booze after a 6 week lapse that started just before my birthday. And with my daughter and thanksgiving this weekend I should be good for a couple days more. Long weekend on Monday and hoping some mushrooms might help with a new perspective.
To be honest Im surprised it didnt happen earlier but I am hopeful it will stop this attempt. Before its completely off the rails again
 
98 days clean and sober. Caught some felonies, did 92 days in jail, now I'm in a 90 day rehab and I'm on drug court for at least the next two years and if I fuck that up I have a 3 year prison sentence hanging over my head. Just snuck my phone into this rehab cuz hot having it was pissing me off...lol.
 
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