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When will I feel normal

Well made the call home told wife.she is a good women did not get mad just said not lose heart its a blip.I do feel better knowing the pills won't be at home when I get back even though o was going to throw them away I would have taken a few before that
 
That's a big step you took. You should be proud.
 
@escape fantasy - what the hell man. u trolling or something? if that's ur experience, well that's fair enuf, but u could at least say that. 1 year would feel like a forever amount to someone who is going thru withdrawal. like i said, if that's your experience, that's fine...but need to be a bit more careful with your posts. peeps can be vulnerable who are on here.
anyway...on to me.
it varies so drastically from person to person. me...week 1 absolutely awful. week 2 slowly getting better, i can be brothered walking to the shop again. week 3 want to go out and socialise again. week 4. feeling good again.
now maintenance...that's a whole other story.
good luck :)
 
ps i take lowish doses of tramadol 100mg and 5mg valium. i take that as required...slowly reducing. it really helps with the twitching legs and mood.
400mg tram and u get into the danger zone or possible fits.
tram gets some peeps high, but not me. i find it helps with the anxiety/mood though
 
Pollyanna Glad said:
ps i take lowish doses of tramadol 100mg and 5mg valium. i take that as required...slowly reducing. it really helps with the twitching legs and mood.
400mg tram and u get into the danger zone or possible fits.
tram gets some peeps high, but not me. i find it helps with the anxiety/mood though
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I found that they made me happy for about 10 mins then it went away.Some people say it make them talk and lift them up.Will admit I was exited when I just took them thinking I'm going to get a good buzz with tolerance so low but was dissapointing
 
yeh. i only use them to help in withdrawal and occasionally if i have a big event on at work and i'm really anxious on the day.
how r u going anyway - how are ur cravings?
 
I'm good find life a little dull sometimes suppose that's part of normal drug free life.Cravings were bad yesterday today is good so far.I find the hardest thing is going home from work and not using.
 
yeh, it's tricky to push past cravings, especially the routine ones ie. get home from work, then use. have u read much about neural reward pathways? might be worth a google search. i find the more i educate myself about addiction and how jt works, the better for me. maybe you can try doing something totally different after work to help trick your mind...like go for a walk, or go to a cafe - that might help.
 
Thanks I'll give it a go.I find dealing with the boredom the hardest.I did think that once I could get thru the wd that would be the hard part over.Im 42 and been on drugs since I was 15 first meth then coke then opium for 13 years.I should have known adjusting to a drug free adult life with all its up and downs would be hard.I was a functioning addict so still did all the husband and kids things but they just seem so boring while not high.I sometimes listen to my colleagues talk about boring mundane things and think how do you guys do it im so fucking bored with life at the moment.I found myself watching a YouTube video about the opioid crisis in Ohio. some kid had injected and started nodding off my wife was like poor kid hope he can get help.Im sitting there craving like anything
 
It's hard man but you have to realize alot of the negative thoughts are related to your brain chemistry being out of whack. Those hopeless feelings and boredom will pass. In the meantime you just gotta hold on tight while the storm in your brain rages.
 
i totally agree cj. if u stay straight long enuf, in my experience the boredom passes after a while, or maybe my expectations of fun change, my standards get lower - lol. in any case, after a few mnths, i start to feel 'engaged' with life again. sometimes it IS just boring :) but even then, it feels more like quiet than boring.
hang in there, it will be interesting too see where you end up.
'they' always say take up a hobbie. i couldn't agree more!
 
cj said:
It's hard man but you have to realize alot of the negative thoughts are related to your brain chemistry being out of whack. Those hopeless feelings and boredom will pass. In the meantime you just gotta hold on tight while the storm in your brain rages.
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Thanks for the advice mate I have no choice but to hang on and after using for 13 years that had lost its charm long ago.I helps so much to hear from people who have gone through it.Gives me hope because I know what I'm feeling is just part of the process by other posters telling me this place only place I can discuss this with people who know.
 
Pollyanna Glad said:
i totally agree cj. if u stay straight long enuf, in my experience the boredom passes after a while, or maybe my expectations of fun change, my standards get lower - lol. in any case, after a few mnths, i start to feel 'engaged' with life again. sometimes it IS just boring :) but even then, it feels more like quiet than boring.
hang in there, it will be interesting too see where you end up.
'they' always say take up a hobbie. i couldn't agree more!
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Talking about hobbies the weather will start getting better here in the UK.I am going to start growing vegetables tomatoes and strawberrys to keep mind occupied.Thought I'd try doing something I would never have done when using.
 
A hello to everyone out there hope all is good.Thought I would give a update on myself.Unfourtanly i have fucked up for the past few weeks.I had thought I had figured out a perfect strategy for using poppy pod tea or powder for one day a week.Week one did it on Monday then a Thursday and left it for three days.Week two did it three times last week did it four days in a row.Here I am now clean since Friday and I'm in minor wd nothing to bad little anxiety yawning and tiredness.Please people don't make my mistake of thinking we can control this bastard of a habit it will bite you in the ads.The funny thing was I thought I could do it max couple of days and it only poppy pod how much harm can it cause I can control it well I can't.
 
yubacity said:
A hello to everyone out there hope all is good.Thought I would give a update on myself. Unfortunately i have fucked up for the past few weeks.... thought I can control it well I can't.
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Some (most?) people don't have a problem moderating their use of mood altering substances. However, I'm not wired like they are. That doesn't make me a bad guy nor does it mean that I'm somehow morally deficient. For example, my partner is not an addict. On the rare occasion that she is prescribed an opiate, she complains as she "doesn't like the way it makes her feel." I cannot relate. I recall a co-worker once commenting on how after breaking a bone, she took 2 painkillers from the full bottle that was prescribed to her and threw the rest away as she "didn't need them any longer." I'm not wired like my colleague. For some reason, that bottle would be more ... let's say ... important.

When I take an opiate, it's a certainty that "the next one" will be at the forefront of my mind.

Years ago I fully accepted the fact that I'm not wired like most people. I'm an addict. I had to identify "special measures" necessary for me to keep drug use from becoming all encompassing. Once identified, action becomes key. Over the years the willingness to take, to enact, such special measures has spanned the continuum: from strict adherence to total neglect.

I don't think you are much different than I am with respect to our relationship with drugs, yuba. I hope you can find a set of special measures that will work for you.
 
oldhippytony said:
Some (most?) people don't have a problem moderating their use of mood altering substances. However, I'm not wired like they are. That doesn't make me a bad guy nor does it mean that I'm somehow morally deficient. For example, my partner is not an addict. On the rare occasion that she is prescribed an opiate, she complains as she "doesn't like the way it makes her feel." I cannot relate. I recall a co-worker once commenting on how after breaking a bone, she took 2 painkillers from the full bottle that was prescribed to her and threw the rest away as she "didn't need them any longer." I'm not wired like my colleague. For some reason, that bottle would be more ... let's say ... important.

When I take an opiate, it's a certainty that "the next one" will be at the forefront of my mind.

Years ago I fully accepted the fact that I'm not wired like most people. I'm an addict. I had to identify "special measures" necessary for me to keep drug use from becoming all encompassing. Once identified, action becomes key. Over the years the willingness to take, to enact, such special measures has spanned the continuum: from strict adherence to total neglect.

I don't think you are much different than I am with respect to our relationship with drugs, yuba. I hope you can find a set of special measures that will work for you.
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I have also accepted that i like a opium high.MY new stratergy is get some b on a sat night smoke it and only keep it to sat.I smoked some last night felt so good so will be keeping it a sat night treat.I cant live my life with no drug plus drinking never been my thing.FUnny thing is the tension is gone of trying to live life without any thing
 
I know people must think im being stupid but i cant not get high least once a week.I enjoyed it and no matter what will keep it to once a week
 
Wonder if anyone can help me.I quit a 13 year habit in feb.Have been smoking heroin now since friday night quite heavy.Will i get withdrawls again bad on will i be ok.last month drank poopy pods for a week and had minor discomfort.Just hoping i could get some lyrica and valium and i should not get major didcomfort.Will be grabbing lyrica today and vslium tomorrow.Can 4 days of use get me in trouble
 
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