• H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

Hard to taper my medication, want to abuse them

pokemama - Just getting outside and going on a short walk around the block is a great start in terms of getting active. Even just a short walk helps more than you might imagine. Perhaps not the first time, but start doing it and after a few days you will notice something or other changing a bit in you.

Make a plan like walking to the local convience store or market, or really anywhere that you can do a little shopping, and get something small that would be nice as a kind of reward. Or using it as a way to buy groceries/etc makes it a productive outing past just getting a little exercise.

Of course the longer the walk, say for like 45 minutes to an hour, the better. Ideally you'd be able to incorporate walking through a park or less urban environment to get into some nature, but working with whatever you have easy access to is a great way to start.

Outsider31 - I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. As another pointed out, it sounds very much the like sort of cravings one comes to expect during a taper or detox. It is nothing to worry about, but definitely something to watch out for and take steps to address.

I understand you feel like you have to do this without anyone knowing about it. Perhaps you have a trusted friend who you feel safe with, someone who would keep what you tell them in confience and not gossip or talk about your situation behind your back? You could explain your situation to such a person and ask them to help you regulate the amount of meds you have access to - such as only giving you enough a day to hold you till the next?

Remember that, and I am not saying you will, if you slip up it isn't the end of the world. You aren't fuck, you don't have to start all over. Keeping a lapse just that, a lapse, and picking yourself up the next day to start right back where you left off is a lot more possible than one might think. There is no reason you have to spiral out of control.

In any case, keep up the great work! You are certainly making progress.
 
Thanks TPD, it's at least comforting to know it's common to experience cravings during a taper. I did have a slip up, for 2 consecutive days I abused my meds. My last dose during the taper was 200mg per day, was on 100 in am and 100 in pm, then my 2 day slip up happened.

I probably should finish my taper, I was all set to be done this Saturday but I've decided to stop my taper and go cold turkey from this point forward. I was only on 200mg gabapentin per day and 0.5 baclofen per day so my thinking is hopefully the withdrawals won't be as bad as when I went cold turkey off such high doses as gabapentin and baclofen.

If need be, I have the 0.2 clonidine my Dr prescribed to use as needed. Definitely going to hold out as long as I can before taking and hopefully won't need em.
 
Actually TPD, Ive been thinking, do you think it would be beneficial for me to just continue my taper even though I've only got 4 days left until I was supposed to go off it? Or at this point should I just continue cold turkey. This is my 2nd day cold turkey. Thanks for the input!
 
As long as by continuing the taper you mean continuing to decrease your dose, if continuing it would make you feel more comfortable and your gut tells you that is what is best for you, I say that is the right choice for you.

What does you taper look like these days? How much are you going down each week?

Back when I was taking off methadone and I would lapse or was struggling with other issues in life, taking a few weeks off the taper and just stabilizing on whatever dose I was at for a bit was very helpful. It meant the taper took longer, but it also kept me safe, healthy and functional. That was I was able to get back on track as soon as I was ready.

The trick was simply balancing not staying put on any one dose for too long, and continuing to whittle away at my taper as soon as I felt like I was ready to again.

Keep up the good work!
 
I started my taper at 1200mg then after 4 days I went down to 900. 4 days later 600. 4 days later 300. I got though 2 days of 200mg per day and that's when I had my 2 day slip up. It's my 3rd day since my slip up and I have still yet to take any more gabapentin.

I noticed this morning the anxiety beginning. Had it bad for a couple hours then it faded and is back now again. Last night I tried clonidine for the first time ever and it made me very sleepy. Not sure I wanna use that during the day.

My previous cold turkey attempts on day 3 left me with severe anxiety, this time since I did at least some kind of taper it's not as bad. Perhaps I should just continue not taking any more gabapentin and just get these withdrawals over with.
 
Generally speaking tapers are usually a 10% dose decrease every one or two weeks. GABAergics (benzos, gabapentin, pregabalin, GHB, nonbenzos (z-drugs), baclofen, phenibut, etc) may require more time so as to not throw off the glutamate system which can cause serious and pervasive neurological damage that then takes years to recovery from. This is not a race and if you turn it into a race you run a high risk of making the situation ignifianly worse - I recommend reading through cj' s getting off of benzos thread and his situation is actually minor compared to what can happen (speaking from personal experience and also through copious research). A good general rule of thumb is if after a drop in dose do not drop again until the symptoms you experience dissipate. If the symptoms are extreme then raise the dose some until they are minor. I also recommend not risking a phenibut addiction as for many phenibut cravings happen in a matter of days and are insidious, and it's too easy to abuse phenibut as it's readily available legally through the internet.
 
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