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  • Trip Reports Moderator: Xorkoth

Mushrooms (5g-7g?) - Experienced - The wave

cyberius

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Mar 11, 2013
Messages
1,571
Lately I've managed to hold on to so much emotional tension it's been oozing out in very negative ways. I held on to dear life to past events that were hurting me.

I had bought an ounce of mushrooms thinking of their known powers to heal you and bring you closer to yourself; I needed a life altering trip to rewire myself. I got what I was looking for.

At 9:00 me and my girlfriend started munching on shroomd. We were both going into the trip with a wait and see attitude and we were both completely unaware of the dose (our scale broke). The comeup andpeak were amazingly euphoric and happy. Everything was fun and mystical and the night was going just great.

We had been munching more and more shrooms ( I ate more ) until about 11 when I felt this emotional release coming on. I've never felt so attracted to anyone more than I did to her that moment and the sex we had was absolutely primal. We felt like we were one person rather than two.

After the sex is where things went south. I started spilling my soul to her. The guilt of me being an ass to her in the past rose to the surface and I just felt my emotions start ramping up in intensity. I was unleashing so much tension.

My emotions kept growing though and I felt this inexplicable sense of ultimate chaos coming over me. I was about to die, this was the end. I had broken the filter and my subconscious was erupting all this stress I've ever held on to.

I (saw) these awful and scary patterns over my vision, I wanted to scream, to lay on the floor and fucking let myself shoot into the hellish pit of shame and guilt. I had the option of letting go and having a complete out of body experience (It felt like rapture, like my soul was about to teleport)

I didn't understand that this wasn't death until later though, and I forcibly held myself in reality against my subscious's will for hours of pure terror. When I finally understood though, it was too late to catch the bus and revitalize myself, to live a new life. I did release some tension though and it was desperately needed.

I fought with my girlfriend, I yelled and cried amd threw a tantrum. I was spilling out everything I was holding on to, and what a massive relief it was. I was ripping apart my old ways and eating every bit of dissonance to give way to a newer and happier version of myself. She followed suit beautifully.

At 8am we started finally winding down. Everything that had to be said was said and we are closer than ever before. Any distance anf dissonance we shared was blown away and we felt reborn.

What a night...

Mushrooms are pretty fucking powerful, and I get that now.

Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_mushrooms
substancecode_tryptamines
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_spiritual
exptype_difficult
roacode_oral
 
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