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Random Stupid things your parents said to you when you were young

Hah, that's funny. Your mom's from which generation? (Don't mean that as a knock, just curious, 'cause I think you have children around my age iirc.)
Mom was born in 1949, so she came along after women had been voting for 30 years. Aparently, though, change comes slowly to the deep south.
 
"Crusing for a bruisin'" all the time.
They also created the impression that like any other parents in the world beat their children for every little thing so I was insanely lucky that they didnt, and always told me they were going strait to heaven when they died for all the punishment I put them through. I also remember being told "us [last name] are not geniuses" when apparently saying something stupid as a child.
It was a pretty normal childhood really, I think every parent must say some things they don't realize is pretty fucked up to a 9 or 10 year old.
 
Just imagine you had the knowledge that you do know but when you were a kid.

ooh the comebacks you could come out with to your parents when they tell you all this rubbish. Would be histerical to see haha
 
Mom: "Hey, can one of your friends roll me a pinner?"

... And after the 1,000th pinner, one day, I decided to say no.

"You guys can either share or smoke your shit somewhere else."

Yeah, we never gave her a hard time about the pinners after that.
 
Mom: "Hey, can one of your friends roll me a pinner?"

... And after the 1,000th pinner, one day, I decided to say no.

"You guys can either share or smoke your shit somewhere else."

Yeah, we never gave her a hard time about the pinners after that.

=D I like your mom.
 
^ Second that notion. Your mom's not saying something stupid, she's saying something smart! :)
 
Mother: (to dad) Aren't you going to do something about this?!?!?!?!?
Father: (to me) Son, I am not angry with you. I am very disappointed. I know that you know better than this. What is your plan in the future to avoid this situation?

I remember him getting REAL mad maybe 3 times. He was just disappointed which was worse and made you feel like a piece of shit.
Also, everything in my house was evaluated so academically with zero emotion.. Could be why I am a psychopath now.
 
"Oh for Christ sake, you would complain that you have a hole in your bum"


"Don't put your hands in your mouth, you don't know where they have been"

"Go outside and get some fresh air around your bum"

"If you can catch a cricket ball how the fuck can you drop a fucking rugby ball?"

I like all thse =) Sounds like what I would say to my kids
 
If I didn't want to brush my teeth when I was younger, my mom would say that it was okay if I "wanted [my] teeth to fall outta [my] head."

That saying certainly did the trick in getting me to brush my teeth, but teeth don't just fall out of your head--Cavities first, then gum disease probably, then they fall out. Somethin' like that. 8)
 
So I was at the grocery store today. I collected a few items and hopped into line and there was a young man in his 20s and who I assumed to be his child of about 4 with him. The child is running around the line and picking up all types of candy bars and other such things that they love to put on racks 3 feet up. Finally the dad gets pissed, throws down his shopping basket, grabs the child by the mouth and shouts at him: "IM GUNNA PUNCH YOU IN THE FAAAAAAAACEE!" The child laughed at him. Just figured I would share.
 
^ Um, did he sound ... joking? If the kid laughed, maybe it's his "command" to stop and stay with dad? :p
 
My dad told me "I still love you even though you didnt turn out the way I wanted you to" lol...ok....thanks??
 
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