• Bluelight
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    A memorial
    to Bluelighters
    who have passed away

tobala

TheLoveBandit

TheLoveBandit

Indefinite break from BL - contact other admin
Joined
Feb 22, 2000
Messages
39,029
It has come to our attention, through the admin email account, that tobala has fatally overdosed. We have no specific information about the circumstances other than that it happened within the past several days.

Word came from tobala's father through an intermediary person. They requested that all information about tobala be removed from the site. We are honoring that request by removing any personal information of the person behind the screen name and ask for your help in keeping such reports off-site (any links to obits, his real name, where he lived, etc). We do, however, wish to keep this shrine thread for our site and members to remember the persona we knew and loved, you can comment in it here.


EDIT - as noted below, please refrain from using his legal name (even just his first name) on this site, out of respect for his family's wishes. Thank you.
 
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Wow...utter shock...I just cant believe it.
Tobala was an amazing person, and although we never really got to speak to each other much, I saw just how much of a great person he was by what he posted here.

He was a witty, smart, caring, and just an all around great person, who will be sorely missed.

My love goes out to his friends and family, as well as everyone else who needs it in this time. <3

Sad sad day :(
 
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This is so sad. Delsyd told me about it last night and we have been managing ever since. My heart is heavy and I cant stop crying but I feel like Im dealing alright.

I just want to share with you all the last time I remember being with him: He drove out on his motorcycle to our house in NJ and picked me up. We hoped onto the back of his bike and rode it for 45 minutes up to Bear Mt., all the way to the top. It was my first time on a motorcycle and I remember hugging him tightly the whole ride up the mountain. We got to the top and found a beautiful lake to hike out too and chill by. We talked for a while and then shared a beautiful experience over my DMT pipe. We both marvled at how the tryptamine played with the water and made it come alive. On the ride back down Bear Mt. we actually ran into a baby black bear which we watched until it ran off over the mountain top. We kept going, making our way back to NJ, on the ride back I had finally become comfortable on the motorcycle and I let go of him, extending my arms out to the side and felt like I was flying. I could tell that Tobala was worried but he let me experience that and then I resumed hugging him around his center for the remainder of the ride home.

When I think of Tobala, I think of how happy he was that day, how excited he was to go on that adventure with me. I cant help thinking that he and his son will not get to have any more adventures which makes me tear up. But now Tobala is resting, hes partaking on a journey now that all of us will eventually join him on. We should all try to remember him as the beautiful, happy, witty person that he was.

Tobala, Im sorry I didnt get back to you sooner, this is my only regret, you were a good friend and me falling away from bluelight made me stop communicating with you and I am sorry.

My thoughts go out to his family and friends and anyone here that is grieving. If you are sad, try to honor your process, try not to mask it with benzos or opiates or other drugs. be nice to yourselves, life is precious. A gift, and we all still have ours. Lets not waste them. Make your moments count. My love goes out to you all.
 
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i will miss you dearly friend.
I only wish we got to see each other more.
<3

I Love You
 
Much love to tobala. You'll be missed very much <3 <3 <3
 
I got to meet tobala for an early morning breakfast on my way down to Florida this past winter. He was a great guy and we had planned on meeting up lots in the future.

I still find it hard to believe he's actually gone, he left far too early. I wish I had more time with him.

Rest in peace my friend. <3
 
I never met tobala in person, but I remember conversing with him several times over Bluelight. He never put on a face that made you think he was trying to be anything else than what he was: a total gentleman. Many people over webforums tend to fall into the trap of trying to one-up others or do the egomaniacal, intellectual high horse thing. Tobala always felt like a real, human being, even through the opaqueness of the internet.

I wish I met the guy. Rest in peace. <3
 
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Beast Wishes, bro', get out of any war you may be in ASAP -- tobala
Click to expand...

:(

I never met him obviously, but he PM'ed me 2 weeks ago because I was fuckin up some thread and being stupid. He seemed like one hell of a nice guy. In our little bit of correspondence he made me feel like I was someone who mattered. Now I'm crying tears for a man that I do not know.

To those lucky enough to call this man your friend: I am sorry for your loss.
 
Definitely one of the best bluelighters of all time... and I don't say that without serious heart behind it. Tobala was always there for n00bs up to admins/engineers and everybody in between.

He was the best of the best in terms of wit, smarts, cheer, caring, initiative, do I really need to go on?

He made me feel very welcome both in the regular forums and amongst staff. I looked forward to the times when he'd lightly jab, tease, provoke, flirt or simply act interested in my life, ideas, beliefs & legal career. It's so sad to know his light will not make new memories for his friends, family, co-workers & random people who were lucky to walk in his life.

Thanks tobala for everything you gave of yourself to us. You will be missed by so many.

<3<3<3 My thoughts are with those who were closer with him than I both in real life & on bluelight. <3<3<3
 
Words can't express what amazing person that bumblz is. I'm so sad that he left so soon. I had always intended to meet him but the cards were just never right, which I regret deeply. He was a good listener and a good friend. I miss him very much.

Rest easy my dear friend, we didn't meet in this world but I'm sure we will in the next.
 
I always read his posts. Thats so sad, man. RIP, you'll be missed.
 
I agree with AmorRoark that he was one the best BLers of all time. Today, BL has lost one of its best and BLers all over the world are sad. This loss has an impact on most of us, pretty much anyone that had the luck of knowing Tobala in anyway. I am glad that he was also a BLer, its makes me proud to be part of this community because we have such great people. I am so so sad about this. Death of people I don't know rarely have any impact on me, but this is different. I am so extremely sad and upset that Tobala is not going to be with us anymore physically. In spirit, he will always be with us, we will always remember him.

OMG. I think the whole BL community is going to mourn this. He was such an integral part of BL. When I saw his name I was hoping at first it was a a joke but then no one would have made such a cruel joke.

I have been here since beginning of 08, this is my second user name and his posts were one of the best, most intelligent, warm, open minded ones. I always liked reading what he wrote. He never tried to be better than anyone, he just naturally was. It came naturally to him to get everyone to pretty much instantly like him. I don't know what it was about him but he has made a large mark on this site. I remember his struggles with addiction and his iboga therapy. His posts were always so open and intelligently written. I am so saddened bu this. I usually don't write in this forum but he deserves it hands down. He was just awesome, what else is there to say. Sometimes there are people who are simply pure awesomeness and Tobala was one of those people

He only always tried to be himself and what he was naturally was awesome. I don't know how else to put it, but he just had this special something that made you like him and respect him without him trying to do that. I love people like that.

I am sure this loss is horrible for his family as if he made such an impact here he must have been very loved in real life as well.

I just want his family to know that during his life he has made an impact on the lives of many people. He made other people's live better just by giving his time here. He was a warm, great person. He will be extremely missed by all of us, even the ones that haven't known him as well as others. I haven't been here for long and I will miss him so I am sure the people that have known him better will seriously feel this loss.

Tobala, I know you are in a better place now. Rest in Peace. We will all remember you here. You will never be forgotten.
 
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I've just removed a couple of instances where Tobala's real name was used. His family have asked to keep his real name out of it so would request that everyone respects this wish and uses only his username when posting. Thankyou.

Goodbye for now, Comrade <3
 
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