worried about friend - how much do YOU smoke?

worried about friend - how much do YOU smoke? (weed)

I don't smoke weed at all, never have and most likely never will, but my boyfriend is what i consider to be a heavy smoker. He says that it's not a problem, that everyone that smokes bongs smokes about as much as he does, but I'm starting to worry, and aren't sure i should believe him - it seems that he can't eat, talk, stand up, go to the toilet or anything without smoking a bong first! I'm hoping that someone can help as to what the 'average' bong-smoker smokes? He smokes minimum 15-25 daily... Thanks!

I don't smoke at all either, but my boyfriend has on average 2-3 cones at night after work.

That's a major improvement on what his habit used to be; around 10-15 a day I'd say, starting with a couple of brekkie bongs before work. He's so much nicer and more sociable to be around now. Don't ask me how it happened though - there was no nagging involved, he just did it himself.

I'm going to transfer this over to Aus Drug Discussion, you might get a better response over there.

Kitty

thats a pretty heavy smoking regime... and Im sure they arent small cones.. thats about $40 on weed a day..

i dont know if there is such a thing as an 'average bong-smoker' but i can understand your problem and concerns. i had a girlfriend, the most beautiful thing in the world, she adored me and would do anything for me but circumstances led to take up smoking dope. as time went on and i smoked more and more she started to get upset with it. i kept telling her what i was doin was fine and that nothings different, after a few months of shit building up between us and me getting smashed everytime i encountered a problem, the end came. i HAD changed and lost probley the most beautiful girl in the world, something that still hurts me on a daily basis. if u care for your b/f which im sure u do.... do what it takes to make him listen and realise, scare tactics - wateva. BEST OF LUCK

Does this level of smoking affect his life? It probably doesn't matter whether he's smoking a joint or an ounce a day, provided he can deal with his responsibilities. Fifteen cones a day is by no means unheard of, however when kept up over an extended period it's easy to deprioritise anything that's 'too hard'. It takes a lot of willpower to get through that.

BigTrancer

BT's on the ball....

if it doesn't affect your day-to-day life then in most people's eyes it's not much of a problem....

i've smoked bongs on an almost daily basis for 5 years....it's fucking terrible, i know.
but doesn't affect my life all that much now....i smoked heaps in year 11 & 12 which wasn't good...but have improved greatly since i've become an adult, "so to speak!"
but now i have a full-time job, working 6 days a week, and hardly smoke....the same as SLM's bf, a few after work but that's about it, even less on weekends!!!!

i think the biggest thing is 'environment', when i was in adelaide last year for 2 weeks, i didn't smoke 1 bong and only had a few joints, didn't even feel like smoking, but as soon as i got back to melbourne i wanted to have a smoke!!!

If it's effecting his partner, then it could be a big problem.

I've known chicks who get fed up and say "pot or me" type thing.

Pot effects everyone differently, and some people absolutely HATE their partner when they are stoned.

^ Yeah... heh heh heh. But chicks come and go. What can you do.

If it's not the pot, it will be you drink too much, or you go out too late, or you don't spend enough time with me, or you never blah blah blah, or blah blah blah...

BigTrancer

yeh my gf doesn't like it went i'm bent... and it's purely for the principle... because when i'm bent i am so layed back and tolerant hehehe oh yeah and i aren't being sarcastic

Shit, it all comes down to whether you're sacrificing life for drugs in my opinion. If you can handle that amount of smoking and still manage to maintain a relatively normal life and tie down all your responsibilities and stuff, then I suppose its okay. But if you can't, that's where its about time to start cutting down severely.

Just to speak on a personal level though, that many cones per day would fucking wreck me. I feel dangerously useless if I have in excess of 5 a day.

-plaz out-

BigTrancer said:

^ Yeah... heh heh heh. But chicks come and go. What can you do.

If it's not the pot, it will be you drink too much, or you go out too late, or you don't spend enough time with me, or you never blah blah blah, or blah blah blah...

BigTrancer

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Heh. We all have things that we tell ourselves, to reason out our behaviour

I was sure that I already posted in here, but obviuosly not.

I would usually just smoke once I came home from work, maybe about 5 cones all night. One the weekend, well heaps more, never really kept count.

Two months ago I moved out of my parents house and I moved in with my sister and my s/o, well the three of us were going through half an ounce in one week, it was ridicoulous, so I convinced myself I had to stop. But I love the green too much.

So now from monday to thursday i will not have a bong, no matter what, my sister and my s/o still smoke every night, but I just refuse to and I feel heaps better, but on the weekend, forget it, I am back to it again, but not as much as I was smoking before. 8)

its a phase, he'll grow out of it.
most heavy bong smokers do.
the rest work at subway the rest of their life

villz said:

its a phase, he'll grow out of it.
most heavy bong smokers do.
the rest work at subway the rest of their life

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HAHA,
they also become excellent takeaway customers at Mexican Restaurants..

It was interesting to read all your responses. My boyfriend doesn't see it as a problem, i guess because he doesn't really know any different - he's been smoking pretty heavily for a while as far as i can tell. His smoking bothers me for a couple of reasons though - firstly, the change in him is amazing after he smokes...he goes from being an attentive, talkative, outgoing, funny and sweet guy into a couch potato that says nothing to anyone and just stares at the TV screen. I guess that's fine once in a while, but nearly all day every day?!? He quit his job because it was 'too much effort', and does absolutely nothing with his day except for smoke. It's always up to me to make the effort to call him or see him and I'm sick of it! Don't get me wrong, i love him alot - when he's not completely stoned we get along wonderfully, and he treats me like a princess - flowers, kisses, cuddles, takes me out to dinner, etc - then he starts sucking down the billys and I wonder what the hell i am doing with this loser... I've trid to talk to him about it, but all his friends do it as well so he thinks that I'm being the unreasonable one. Perhaps i am, as I entered the relationship knowing full well that he smoked weed on a regular basis...? At the same time, I'm not willing to just give up and walk away as i know the relationship could be fantastic if there was no (or at least a lot less) bong smoking on his behalf... hmm....

girragundji said:

Perhaps i am, as I entered the relationship knowing full well that he smoked weed on a regular basis...?

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Sorry darling you answered your own question there?!

Sounds like you've got a couple of options at least:

1. Give him an ultimatum: Bongs or Girlfriend. Be prepared for a harsh surprise just in case - after all he was willing to give up his job because it was too much effort, why not give up a relationship that's all of a sudden become a hassle?

2. Deal with it and ignore the problem: After all you say when he's not stoned he treats you like a princess. Isn't it worth waiting for? Or, even better, make him treat you like a princess when he's stoned too.

3. See if you can encourage him to do things when he is stoned: Before he hits 'couch city' try doing normal stuff together so he can realise that being stoned doesn't make sitting on the couch compulsory. It takes effort, but not everyone has to turn into some stereotype stoner if they don't want to. Trust me, getting on with your life stoned isn't as hard as it sounds. Just taking the initiative to do so is hard.

4. See if he's willing to cut back a little to keep you happy - sounds like the only person who he's keeping happy by smoking a lot is himself, which is pretty selfish if he's in a relationship and it's affecting you negatively. At least that would be a first attempt to see if you can get a compromise out of him, if not, then you can go for (1) or (2) above, depending how the ensuing argument goes...

Ask yourself how you would feel if he wanted you to give up something you really enjoy too. I mean really he's made it abundantly clear that he loves smoking choof, to the extent that he devotes his life to it to the exclusion of employment and any other activities. Would he hold a grudge against you because you made him quit smoking just to save your relationship? Would you feel comfortable in the knowledge you've taken away his main hobby and interest in life at the moment? How will this affect his other friendships, and will you feel bad if he has to distance himself from all those people just to avoid feeling like smoking, because they always do?

BigTrancer

villz said:

its a phase, he'll grow out of it.
most heavy bong smokers do.
the rest work at subway the rest of their life

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Not me....

Ive smoked daily for the past 20 years of my life....

And it has not affected my work, family or social life....

I dont think I will ever out grow my habbit....

I smoke a gram a day and I wouldn't change a thing....

Heavy dope smoking is not a phase IMO....

Its ultimatly the individuals choice....

I live with a housemate who is a heavy smoker. Bongs for breakfast, every night, all weekend.. Her life revolves around her weed.

I notice HUGE changes in her mood when she doesn't have it OR knows she can't afford it. She turns real bitchy and moody. I always steer clear when I know she hasn't had it because she just turns into this completely different person.

I also find her to be a real "stoner" she isnt fun to talk too, she's not motivated to do anything, and all she cares about is her weed. When she's smashed, having a conversation with her will put you to sleep.

(ME) - Q: "How was your day Sarah?"
(HER) A: "errm k"

Im not saying everyone is like this, but Im sure it has different affects on different people. Everything in Moderation - I mean.. You don't see me gobbling down MDMA everyday!

Shal