how many drug "experiences" have you had in your lifetime?

Over the past twenny years, well for me its been a lot [ and dont mean it sound like a dick size thread]. I'm not counting alcohol or marijuana... i'm not sure where else to draw the line. but just counting E, speed, acid and exotics i suppose it could count as much as a thousand, though i certainly hope its more like 650... so hard to estimate!!
sometimes i think well maybe i've been a bit excessive... but its been over such a long time. sometimes i worry a little about the future. and these days i am rediculously and maticulously more conscious of my decisions in relation to drugs. i hardly go there, but often go hard.

so how do you feel about your habit... is it a habit... do you worry about long term effects... can you be honest with yourself... how do you, or do do you, counter any negatives you encounter or percieve you may encounter???


[did i say doodoos]

After a bit of a honeymoon with drugs and intoxication in general, I'm happy to say I've slowed down significantly. It took one debilitating slap in the face to slow me down to the point I am at now, but I was not far from waking up to myself anyway... Or so I like to think - I'm not very good at being honest with myself. When I'm at a party and the sattie is empty or the ciggie pack is empty, and I know I told myself I wouldn't get any more... I easily justify getting more to myself with a complete load of codshit. Of course, I only really admit that it's codshit once I've spent the money and got what I wanted.

I wouldn't have the foggiest how many times I've used drugs. I don't consider my use to be a habit, other than cigarettes. My drug use is a once every 1-3 month endeavour, and is never planned... For me, plans = expectations = dissapointment when expectations aren't met, even if there's plenty of opportunity for a good time.

Countering the dark possibilties... First and formost is company. Good company. Someone I can come down with. Second is a range of standard HM practices.

As I get older I'm getting more and more concerned about the possible problems I could be seeding now... A year or so ago my future didn't really seem to matter - I thought I'd be dead by 30 anyway... I guess I'm just wising up to the world

You might find this thread interesting - the quiet...late night drug fuelled discussions with your doppleganger.

Experience Pref'd...

Its interesting, I think that perhaps my total of drug experiences could be between 50 and 100, but its really quite difficult to count. It of course depends on whether we're counting by 'weekend' or by substance, or amount. Because by differing those types of measurement or yardstick, its going to elicit very different results from different people.

I have very few habits, and I have had very few. What I have is a Cannabis habit, but that's okay, because I know that when I feel like dropping a habit I have very little trouble (Addictions are quite different). I've been addicted to Opiates and had problems with Methamphetamine before, I've also had my share of Alcohol dependancy for a while as well. I'm very honest with myself (or that's my perception anyway) when it comes to my habits, because I'm far too aware of what I'm doing to be ignorant of when I am becoming too well aquainted with any particular substance. I no longer consume Opiates or Methamphetamines, and Alcohol has become a fairly rarely consumed substance for me as well. I did of course go through a stage of smoking cigarettes too often to call it 'social' smoking, and so that would be a habit as well, I no longer smoke cigarettes, and haven't for a little while, but I do 'spin' Cannabis when I'm smoking that, so I suppose I'm not 100% off Nicotine.

I'm well aware of the long-term damage potential of all of the recreational drugs that I've consumed and continue to consume over the last 2 years or so, and I no longer even need to remind myself that there's no such thing as a free ride, you pay at some point along the line. I'm starting to become aquainted with the fact that I'm suffering the negative side effects of chemical exploration even at the moment. Why do I still do it with such an attitude?

Its because the things I've learned and the fun that I've had and the occasional few moments of transcendental psychadelic bliss and enlightenment are worth the damage, to me.

-plaz out-

I honestly couldn't give you an estimation any better other than to say hundreds (over a thousand? Very possible).

The high number comes from a desire (from very young) to remove myself from sobriety more or less permanently, which I have done over the years with illegal and legal means. I definitely see the high number as a bad thing, and the result of a self destructive personality trait.

I would suspect that it has significantly reduced my life span and had negative mental and physical effects. I dont think anywhere nearly as quickly as I used to. My memory is shot. I seem to have some dyslexic symptoms now. I seem to have far more ADD type symptoms.

excellent responses all round

for the purpose of the study let us call a drug experience a single waking period punctuated by the use of one and or many substances. this is because i'm more interested in how many times youll go back to the old horse for another whippin, than i am in specifically how much shit we all taken.



how true, too often...

Of course, I only really admit that it's codshit once I've spent the money and got what I wanted.

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What I have is a Cannabis habit, but that's okay, because I know that when I feel like dropping a habit I have very little trouble

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this sounds a little naive.
i'd also like to add, without offending you, it would be difficult for you to convince me that you have had a problem with opiates and methamphetamine in only 50 drug experiences.

The high number comes from a desire (from very young) to remove myself from sobriety more or less permanently, which I have done over the years with illegal and legal means. I definitely see the high number as a bad thing, and the result of a self destructive personality trait.

Click to expand...

for me i've always believed that i yerned greater experiences than the common man! i believed in the doors of perception. i believed i was expanding my range of experiences and therefor the knowledge base from which i draw my wisdom... then i discovered that the last 300 acid trips had all been the same!! so yeah, jakoz... perhaps it is i who needs to be more honest with himself!


there's been plenty of thread viewers... but not so many prepared to offer their personal life to the page. as i said to BT, i dont want to advocate and promote irresponsible drug use... but i do think there's a discussion here.

i practice basic harm min.... these days, thanks BL. i hope i didnt find you all too late, tho i suspect one day the doctor will say to many of you "hmmm looks like spgeddi syndrome!!"

my sig sums it all up 4 me.

and taken from the pinger link... thanks apollo, i did very much appreciate the thread.

pinger
so what about you, whispering reader...
are you killing pain? does it help you to forget?
are you seeking to belong? do you need to feel?
are you looking for yourself? does e get you closer?
are you capturing your youth? do you bathe in false imagination?
are you escaping your youth? can you push through the wait?
pinger

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Spageddi, there's different math behind them there equations...

Just to clarify, that 50-100 is if we're counting illicit substances only.

Given that ALL the opiates I have consumed have been legally available ones (including prescription only stuff) if I counted those, I'm not sure how many it would push it up to, but that'd add quite a fair few onto that original total. Counting ALL drug experiences, it'd be probably over 200 or so. Its fucking hard to keep count though, or be sure.

-plaz out-

^^^

ya, true... and yeah, i am rethinking my statement re "prob with"... afterall, who's problem was it (reakon you'd know yourself pretty well esquire).

I'd say that i've had between 100 and 200 drug experiences and they have left there mark. I'm not the same guy who just smoked weed everyday- i think different, feel different for although drugs have side effects i think their primary function is self discovery! I had an outward looking analytical mind but it took drugs LSD in particular to force my gaze inward and what was happening inside in the here and now.

I used to be a complete athesist, but that's because i was looking for something meaningful in the wrong places- sitting amongst a waterfall while trippin and feeling my entire underlying form shatter into pieces and begin to float down the stream taught me that all energy is the same- we are all part of the same system- a system of such beauty that it deserves reverance. Religion is inside, man does not need an instituition between him and the source- merely if he can't realise it anyway then he needs the tools to enhance his understanding- zen and the art of pharmalogical psyche maintainence. Do i regret it? No fucking way, it's a part of me and if i could take one trip a month for the rest of my life then i probably would... although experimentation has taught me respect and what i don't like.

Pills generally hold few thrills for me these days and i will only take them i've there's nothing else around, if there is nice drug friendly lady to talk to (i think i'm a total stud on pills, which is half the battle won for me anyway!). Although increasingly the train of depressing thoughts that seem to invade my mind, is telling me that i don't really value the MDMA experience as a short burst of hedonistic fun, with fairly heavy consequences to be paid for that fun. I've always thought as such and as a consequence have never really had a honeymoon, wouldn't be suprised if i didn't touch the stuff by the end of the year- i've had about 3 this year. I've quit pot twice and now marijuana has joined nitrous as a synergistic drug- and now that i smoke very rarely i can really feel how long pot stays with you one cone now and i can feel that sluggishness for 3 days. Alcohol and nicotine is my only habit, trying to cut the ciggs out though- was clean for 2.5 weeks then went away with my family- back smoking after the first night with those beasts!

As far as my habits go ciggerettes must go- bring on the booze and acid!

modern hedonism is my religion.

eddi:

But where is hedonism without cheese and wine?

whats hedonism?

And ill say not including booze, around 10 - 15, haha a long way to go yet.

Just got to be sure to stick to your guns in regards to how often you want to roll/trip/whatever floats ur boat, and take a long break now and then. but then again im prolly just paranoid!

theres kind of 2 answers:

Psychological hedonism is the view that humans are psychologically constructed in such a way that we exclusively desire pleasure. Ethical hedonism is the view that our fundamental moral obligation is to maximize pleasure or happines

Basically it is when we do something purely for the pleasure for ones own pleasure

Are you saying that you keep doing drugs until the pain/consequences are greater than the pleasure? If so that is my plan. It is difficult to determine long term consequences so it is hard to factor in.

I reckon my experiences would really look like a bell-shaped curve over time with the peak of my use occuring sometime early last year. Since then it has been a steady progression downwards with jadedness kicking in and other things taking priority.

Also when you say drug "experiences" I think it might be more useful looking at "unique experiences" rather than constant use of a particular substance, which although is an experience, it isn't a new one and could be why it is difficult to count them separately.

Also plazma I don't know what your definition of a habit is, but used in the context of drug use, a habit is simply a synonym for addiction.

In answer to the first Question, in about a 4 year period, somewhere around 100 'sessions'.

This is something that has slowed down significantly since the begining of this year, with only about 4/5 significantly altered states being achieved during this time. On reflection, this is due to a number of factors, ranging from an internal recognition that much of my amphetamine and other drug use had simply become habitual, to the external factor of the developing nature of my relationship to my b/friend, who was aquired on new years morning this year. He isn't what could be really described as a regular stimulant user, and while not being visibly upset by my use, is made somewhat uncomfortable by it. (which he will never openly admit)

In answer to the above, habitual use and use that is born of addiction are significantly different concepts. It seems to me that Plazma would use the term in much the same way i would: something that is carried out by force of habit, such as smoking meth with your friends once a month or so, because you have a long tradition of such nights. It becomes habitual for you to accept the pipe, even if you hadn't really put any thought into whether or not you felt the urge to get tweaky. Or when you go to a pub, and have one or two drinks, because that's just what you do, force of habit. Or even another habit of mine, long bannished to my earlier flirtations with drug use, where i would habitually drop MDMA at raves/house gatherings, because it was really just a habit for me to do that, to the point where necking a pill just seems like the natural consequence of being out, not because you really need or desire to be high.

Addiction on the other hand, is a situation where you are totally dependant on a certain mode of behaviour to function. Such as where you really gotta smoke meth with some friends once a month, because it's become the cultimation of your life, the single high point, where all your other actions and very thoughts are at best an accessory to this moment, and at worst are leading you directly to that moment. Addiction is when you have to drink at a pub, or neck some MD** because you simply cannot interact without the aid of that social lubricant. Addictions range in extremes, the above are only examples of the mild end of the spectrum, but they nevertheless should not be confused with habitual actions.

72 Total significant ones. I have a little log of all the significant experiences.

In total its easily over 1000 (thats including alcohol).

I would say probably about 200 not including alcohol.
8)

gonzo said:

Are you saying that you keep doing drugs until the pain/consequences are greater than the pleasure? If so that is my plan. It is difficult to determine long term consequences so it is hard to factor in.

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problem here is the justification rule.
i can always justify it.
what pain anyway?
i still get higher than i do low.

Ive been going preeety hard for around 5 years now and the benifits are still far outweighing the costs. In fact the way I am going I will be still having lots of fun with chems at 70 if I get that far.
So ...whos counting...it hurts my head too much8(

Ahahah Supa

you crack me up