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Technology and Communication

Miss Peks

Miss Peks

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Aug 17, 2000
Messages
10,767
After being addicted to the net for about 5yrs or more I've decided that it's just too hard to try and interpret someones exact feelings when you can't even see them or hear their voice.
Like for example I have weird sense of humor and when I try to act out on that on ICQ it just doesn't work (although people don't even get it in real life), there are sometimes where I've even had people get angry with me because they thought I was paying out on them, when really I wasn't.
I know doing smiley faces helps, but who can really be fucked doing that every 10 seconds, I know I can't anyway.
I guess my point is this. Whatever happened to good old person to person communication and talking to someone on the phone??
It would be intresting to see how people feel about this.
 
pekkie, either sms me or email me and we'll have this discussion ok??
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sorry only joking, I agree totally, I much prefer talking to someone in person or on the phone to on icq.. mind you I find that in real life if you talk to someone who does not use the net and you try to say LOL to them they give you strange looks
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Personally I think we're in a Technological Age and its only going to get worse!!
By the way.. I wonder what we're talking about when you say "its hard to understand they're true feelings"
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Got any real life situations to tell us about??????
 
Hey guys what about good old face to face communication, e.g lets go grab a coffee and have a chat about something. Technology is only an express form of communication and is probably relied upon too much I reckon.
Not enough people just talking face to face today methinks.
Oh the irony of posting this on a message board to anonymous people.
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Talking face-to-face or over the phone is much better for getting the message accross because we are used to the many nuances in someone's voice/facial expressions/body language which we use to determine any messages not contained within the actual words they are using... This is done consciously by some people, but subconsciously by all...
Those hidden messages (there's a term for it and if i'd studied psychology I could prolly tell you what it is, but i can't, so I'm not gonna... er, back to the topic...
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) are a lot harder (and sometimes impossible) to convey in written (or typed) form.
So why do we talk on the phone less these days? A few reasons that I can think of...
  1. The electronic form is a hell of a lot more convenient. There are times when I'll want to tell someone something, but for whatever reason I can't call them at that time... I can always send an email tho (as long as I can connect to the internet, and yeah, I can just about always do that...) and just about always send an SMS (unless its like 3am and I know they're asleep but will have their mobile on just incase but will be pissed off if I send them an SMS and wake them up just to say "I'm chopped! This is friggin awesome!
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    "
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    )
  2. Its easier to say all that I want to without being interrupted... I hate butting in when someone is talking, so if they're the kind of person who can ramble on for ages without a pause (*waves at bk*
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    ) then it can be hard to say what I want to say on a certain topic... I'm also generally quiet anyway and don't say much unless I really want people to hear it because I think its important... However in electronic form I can pick parts of multiple posts/paragraphs and reply to each one at my own pace... In normal conversation it can become dan confusing if you keep jumping back and forth... I also have a pretty screwed short term memory, so once once topic of conversation is done with, I tend to forget anything I wanted to say as soon as the next one is brought up...
  3. Something which is less of an issue with me, but some people tend to hide behind the screen and use it to say what they want without fear of reprisal, or at least they can ignore any reprisal 'cos its just some words on a screen... Someone screaming in your face is a lot harder to handle
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    ...I'm pretty much the same in person as I am on this board (if given the chance to have my say
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    but as I said in the second point, I'm usually pretty quiet)
  4. Finally, and prolly the harshest point, while online, some people pretend to be someone they are not, and that fakery (that's a word right?
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    ) is a lot harder to pull off in-person... (no not me, I'm not like that! Shut up!
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    )[/list=a]
    But I think the main reason for the use of electronic forms of communication rather that calling someone on the phone or going out for a coffee or something is convenience
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    All your drug are belong to us
 
Personally I don't even think talking on the phone comes close to face-to-face. I much rather use communication technology to organise face-to-face meetings or only for discussion which can't physically be performed face-to-face (such as on this message board or with friends and family on the otherside of the country or planet).
Spending half an hour talking with someone is infinitely more fulfilling than spending that same half an hour chatting to them on ICQ or the phone.
 
With you there again Tars.
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I also think under the 'convenience' banner comes 'cost'. I can talk to 20 or more people online for hours at the cost of a local call basically, from all sides of the globe. Its a pity we've lost our old ways of communication, but i guess this is the way of the future. Its for these reasons that i push soo hard to get meetups going, because without those, we wouldn't know each other on a personal level, and that would be a big shame.....
DJC
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"We are the Children of the Revolution"
 
Xtine22: What the hell are you talking about
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.
I do hear what everyone is saying, but I'm thinking that I should meet up with people a lot more than I do though it's hard with a full time job and trying to organise my own business. I guess this is where ICQ, chat rooms, forums, message boards and SMS come in.
It's just not the same that's all.
 
of course it's not the same online.
that's why we go to parties!!!
=> so we can chat wif our friends, and hang out and meet heaps of new people and find out what people are like in real life?
and for music and chemicals too... but not as much for me...
 
I don't have a problem with the amount of time I spend using electronic forms of communication because I also spend some time on the phone, and some time going out with people, so I don't feel as if much is lacking...
Some people in my situation might not feel that way, but I'm not all that concerned, it's my shoes I'm filling, not theirs...
Hell, my mobile phone bill has tripled in the last couple of months, I must be doing more talking than I realise
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the one major problem with technology and communication is that ppl rely so heavly on a person's non verbal cues as to the real feelings/meanings of a conversation ect. and this is for a very good reason! only 5% of the truth in any given conversation comes from words themselves...95% is hidden in non verbal communication...which is why it is sooo important to talk face to face with ppl.
(there's ur psyc explanation tars)
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On my mobile? There's no way I could afford that! ...No, that's what I use the house phone... Oh Shit, said too much... *flees*
 
It's also possible in email or bb's as a non-confronting communication medium to make every sentence just right. If you call someone on the phone you have to deal with them then and there, but by email you have the chance to say everything you want, and control the direction of the conversation. That way you don't have to think on your feet, and you can write everything down exactly the way you want to say it, without any mistakjes.
BigTrancer
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Load brain into cannon. Aim at universe. Shoot.
 
When there's something really important that I have to say, i MUCH MUCH prefer to write it down.
I have always expressed myself better through writing - when I try and say alot of the stuff i mean to say, i get flustered and it all comes out wrong. When I write it's like a stream of consciousness which I can see take shape.
Even if I end up reading out what Ive written (which seems to work)it's like a thought process I need to go through to become clear about stuff.
So yeah, i agree you cant beat actual real life interaction, sometimes written/typed form proves to be more practical.
*nod*
 
weeeeeee - diskochik beat me too it ..... but i call them paralinguistic markers, things like volume, stress, pitch, speed that can change the meaning of speech in important ways, particualarly in communication of emotion.
so there's another psych explanation for ya's
bk
and whadda ya mean about me not letting anyone get a word in edgeways tars, i can be quiet ....... sometimes :p
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.... they like pornographic girls and dope beats ....
 
Yep - most of us still prefer face-to-face communication of course - but how many of us here would ever be 'chatting' if this type of communication didn't exist? Think of e-comms as additional to / over & above our normal comms & don't allow them to replace normal comms - but supplement them.
My $0.02. Looking forward to meeting some of you at the Enmore meetup - or would that blow my preconceptions? Maybe its safer to stay cyber.... :)
 
I can picture Tarsy now... Human Traffic-style calling the phone sex numbers
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hehehehehe
 
Nah I don't call those numbers anymore... It pays better being on the other end... Ha! And you thought that when I said I work on the phone all day that I meant call centre work for a phone company or something... Ha! Fooled ya's all!
Erm, anyways, the real reason for replying is to post a link to this thread: http://www.bluelight.ru/ubb/Forum29/HTML/001452.html?reload=20
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Its easy to be,
Easy and free,
When it doesn't mean anything...
You remain selfless, cold, and composed...
 
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