Recovery WTF? Waking up having lost concepts.

[Pissed_and_messed]

I had this freaky thing in summer, somewhere between fourth and eighth week after my drop to total absence of benzos, where I woke up from my daily 3 hour sleep to intense panic and feeling as if someone had scooped huge chunk of left side off of my brain. I had this overwhelming cognition that I HAD to take SOMETHING SPECIFIC, but I couldn't figure out WHAT THE FUCK was it. I tried to scroll through my mind figuring out what it could have been, what drugs there even exist and what I had, but were only able to come up with oxycodone and benzos, but I knew it wasn't neither. I had very weak grip on concepts of reality. Trotting around in my flat in unexplainable, despaired panic, on edge of weeping for few minutes, it finally set off and it dawned upon me, that there was NOTHING I had to take, nor I had shit on me. Only coffee and propranolol.
Some weeks later I started to experience feeling I can not describe otherwise than "having menthol on my brain". I don't know if it is related but because it is highly localized sensation the same way as sensation of having chunk of brain scooped off, I mention this also. It still comes up about once a week and I actually like it, I dunno why is it but I can imagine it being just neurons learning to fire properly again.

THE ACTUAL FUCK was that? Aside of "generally-you-are-just-messed"-syndrome, I can only come up with some form of sleep paralysis (sleep paralysis where I have sensation of my paralyzed body but visions of complete dream is familiar to me) and seizure as explanations. I wasn't under effect of any drug other than maybe trace amounts of mirtazapine, nor had hangover.

 

[Pissed_and_messed]

oh yean never had seizure as far as I know

 

[December Flower]

where I woke up from my daily 3 hour sleep to intense panic and feeling as if someone had scooped huge chunk of left side off of my brain.

sleep longer than 3 hours. 6 or 7, your choice, but no less, no more.

I had a patient with pretty severe brain damage from oxygen deprivation, sleeping 2-3 hours a day for years
soon as I read abstinence from benzos and 3 hours of sleep alarm bells were already ringing for me

sleep longer. i know it's probably very difficult for you atm, but you need to get yourself to the point, no matter what.
do sports before sleep, drink sleeping tea, fuck, play five versus Willy, whatever.

There's always methods, and you need to sleep longer, this is not open for discussion

 

[Pissed_and_messed]

sleep longer than 3 hours. 6 or 7, your choice, but no less, no more.

I had a patient with pretty severe brain damage from oxygen deprivation, sleeping 2-3 hours a day for years
soon as I read abstinence from benzos and 3 hours of sleep alarm bells were already ringing for me

sleep longer. i know it's probably very difficult for you atm, but you need to get yourself to the point, no matter what.
do sports before sleep, drink sleeping tea, fuck, play five versus Willy, whatever.

There's always methods, and you need to sleep longer, this is not open for discussion

It has been while, I actually sleep 5 hour/day without ANY meds. 12 hours with mirtazapine.