Benzos Worried.. Benzos now causing my favorite high?

[OpiateKiller]

So for the longest time I hated benzos.. just saw absolutely no use in them,
No recreational value, no real fun or effects.

In the past few years I’ve gone through a whole lot of a shit, it’s amazing I’m still able to function after all the traumatic shit I’ve experienced. (Multiple overdoses, running from a police K9, my dad chasing me with a bat black out drunk, my girlfriend cheating on me, been to jail twice) ... definitely could be diagnosed PTSD.

But the scary thing is that, now when I take benzos and that feeling in my body of constant fear and anxiety and paranoia is lifted, it truly is the greatest high known. And this shit scares me cause I’ve been through H withdrawal and I don’t want to addict myself to another substance.

It’s just crazy how much life changes and how those changes can change the ways drugs affect us. The feeling 5 mg Xanax gives me is one of utter bliss and freedom, a feeling I haven’t known in years.

I think people who haven’t had anxiety or traumatic situations may feel the same way I used to, that benzos really have no value. But holy shit when you change from all the pain, those things are like magic. It’s dangerous.

 

[Cream Gravy?]

Benzos are the most dangerous drug WD wise. But they are valuable in treating life destroying conditions. I was suicidal from chronic Gi pain recently and now that I take alprazolam (prescribed, don't trust street bars) for the pain I'm not longer suicidal, it helps immensely.

Also works amazing for my anxiety, which probably ties into my IBS pain relief.

For those who have struggled with anxiety all their life trend to love the drug class. I love it, But it's not for everyone, and can be very dangerous if not tapered properly.

 

[ghostandthedarknes]

and now you hold a 2 headed snake.

 

[PurpleDANK9]

Yes, I got some friends that doesnt like Benzos high, says it doesnt do nothing on them. But for people who was anxiety, that is magic of course.

But watch out , the more you take it will make your anxiety even worst when you stop taking it.

And It will be a cycle that never ends.

 

[KS78]

I experienced the same change of effects from benzos, actually mainly Alprazolam. I never enjoyed it for many years but after having a few devastating problems, it became one of my favorite substances next to heroin and cocaine. Then it turned into a very serious problem which made me do incredibly reckless things while on it.
It seems like you know what kind of trouble you probably will face if you decide to use it extensively, abuse it. I hope that you manage to follow your own logic and stay safe. They are extremely useful when you genuinely need them but once you loose control, it can fuck up a person's life drastically.

 

[JoEhJoEh]

I would not even say it's just anxiety people who like benzos - like me. I'm taking them recreationally since 2008 - i had never a problem because i do it in a controlled way, But my tolerance of course is extreme - others would never wake up after taking what i take.

I'm an ADHS-person, perhaps thats why i love benzos so much - they make me calm down.....

 

[PtahTek]

... when I take benzos and that feeling in my body of constant fear and anxiety and paranoia is lifted, it truly is the greatest high known. And this shit scares me....

That is the "high" that we get from benzos... no anxiety. It is awesome and god-like to me.
If there is a script from a Doc?
If not stop or get a cript if possible as as posted a two-headed snake or as I like to spout "two-edged sword". IME H wd is bearable compared to a full-on dependence sudden cessation from benzos.
FUCKIN PLEASE... go back to something that will provide a little less dangerous wd or go see a dr and get a script... just tell him/her the same shit you posted here or show her/him the thread in person.
Best to you and love always

 

[JoEhJoEh]

That is the "high" that we get from benzos... no anxiety. It is awesome and god-lik

Hi,

thanks for your quick answer. Its much worse than you think...... I can take 25 mg (sic!) Clonazolam and 15 mg Flubromazolam and nothing worse happens. I never blacked out, perhaps i slept a bit. on these doses i'll sleep max. 5 hours.


THats it , unfortunally....

 

[OpiateKiller]

I would not even say it's just anxiety people who like benzos - like me. I'm taking them recreationally since 2008 - i had never a problem because i do it in a controlled way, But my tolerance of course is extreme - others would never wake up after taking what i take.

I'm an ADHS-person, perhaps thats why i love benzos so much - they make me calm down.....

thats what I mean the amount I can take and still properly function is pretty scary on the scale.

a 25 mg dose of Etizolam for a normal person would either kill them or put them into a psych ward with no in between ..

its absurd really

 

[JoEhJoEh]

thats what I mean the amount I can take and still properly function is pretty scary on the scale.

a 25 mg dose of Etizolam for a normal person would either kill them or put them into a psych ward with no in between ..

its absurd really

I believe you and know that very well. 45 mg Clonazepam and 20 Flubromazolam. no blacout, just a bit of sleep.

 

[PtahTek]

this is why i verbatim posted:

it is awesome and god-like to me.

the "to me" is a declaration indicative that this may or may not be the same for all. well aware that we all have differing experiences with erryting.
if i got it wrong forgive the ol fool.
one

 

[Xorkoth]

I believe you and know that very well. 45 mg Clonazepam and 20 Flubromazolam. no blacout, just a bit of sleep.

Dude I really hope you never get cut off from benzos, that is truly horrifying how large of a dose you're on, and for you to need more of very long-lasting benzos after 5 hours, holy shit. No judgment man... but if I were you, I would be seeking to taper myself down. What happens if you can't get RC benzos anymore? Cold turkey at that level is not an option if you want to survive. Good luck.

 

[THECATINTHEHAT]

Yeah that is a scary level of habit, the potential for tolerance building with benzos is just insane. I've had a daily habit of 200mg diazepam and done 80mg etizolam in a day but 45mg clonazepam daily is scary. I've met people with 1g diazepam habits before, the prognosis is not great when you develop a benzodiazepine habit that big.

Definitely a second voice behind encouraging you to think about decreasing the size of your habit here. Irrespective of the danger of getting cur off from a habit that big which is by itself frightening, if you let a habit like that go in for too long the potential for really severe PAWS is huge. I think that the effects of PAWS are often overstated by many, but it is definitely a real thing and a habit like that is asking for it.

I totally understand the OP though, they are my favourite high too. They make everything ok in a way that almost nothing else does for me. They're also the catalyst for destruction of any good in my life.

 

[Specified]

So for the longest time I hated benzos.. just saw absolutely no use in them,
No recreational value, no real fun or effects.

In the past few years I’ve gone through a whole lot of a shit, it’s amazing I’m still able to function after all the traumatic shit I’ve experienced. (Multiple overdoses, running from a police K9, my dad chasing me with a bat black out drunk, my girlfriend cheating on me, been to jail twice) ... definitely could be diagnosed PTSD.

But the scary thing is that, now when I take benzos and that feeling in my body of constant fear and anxiety and paranoia is lifted, it truly is the greatest high known. And this shit scares me cause I’ve been through H withdrawal and I don’t want to addict myself to another substance.

It’s just crazy how much life changes and how those changes can change the ways drugs affect us. The feeling 5 mg Xanax gives me is one of utter bliss and freedom, a feeling I haven’t known in years.

I think people who haven’t had anxiety or traumatic situations may feel the same way I used to, that benzos really have no value. But holy shit when you change from all the pain, those things are like magic. It’s dangerous.

There's 5mg where do you live?

 

[OpiateKiller]

There's 5mg where do you live?

no was just a general statement of dosage. I don’t usually get pills anyways I get gram bags of powder. Not pharmaceutical

 

[Specified]

no was just a general statement of dosage. I don’t usually get pills anyways I get gram bags of powder. Not pharmaceutical

Ah ok valium doesn't do anything for me...its all about xanax

 

[PtahTek]

cluldnt imagine an ounce of alp and diaz..... my nerves would be shot just holding it....

 

[nuttynutskin]

Dude I really hope you never get cut off from benzos, that is truly horrifying how large of a dose you're on, and for you to need more of very long-lasting benzos after 5 hours, holy shit. No judgment man... but if I were you, I would be seeking to taper myself down. What happens if you can't get RC benzos anymore? Cold turkey at that level is not an option if you want to survive. Good luck.

Holy shit, that's an obscene amount.

 

[OpiateKiller]

Yeah that is a scary level of habit, the potential for tolerance building with benzos is just insane. I've had a daily habit of 200mg diazepam and done 80mg etizolam in a day but 45mg clonazepam daily is scary. I've met people with 1g diazepam habits before, the prognosis is not great when you develop a benzodiazepine habit that big.

Definitely a second voice behind encouraging you to think about decreasing the size of your habit here. Irrespective of the danger of getting cur off from a habit that big which is by itself frightening, if you let a habit like that go in for too long the potential for really severe PAWS is huge. I think that the effects of PAWS are often overstated by many, but it is definitely a real thing and a habit like that is asking for it.

I totally understand the OP though, they are my favourite high too. They make everything ok in a way that almost nothing else does for me. They're also the catalyst for destruction of any good in my life.

Well said. I’d rather live than continue this path.. I’m trying not to get more it’s difficult

 

[OpiateKiller]

this is why i verbatim posted:

the "to me" is a declaration indicative that this may or may not be the same for all. well aware that we all have differing experiences with erryting.
if i got it wrong forgive the ol fool.
one

No you’re 100% on point. Having this kind of tolerance is a terrible thing and I need to be entirely sober for the remainder of my life or death is highly likely outcome. Almost 27 the average age of heroin addicts.. rip